authoramalgam · 1 year ago
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HAH MNAF 3 Time babeyyyy! Featuring the worlds LONGEST park tour
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l-norris · 4 months ago
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Spanish GP 2024 Recap
Part 3 of this strangely therapeutic thing I call content!
Forgot to write out stuff that happened pre-race cuz I was busy stressing over final exams tomorrow and realised it only as the formation lap was complete lmao.
('Tis the reason I'm posting it today already as well, brother I am SUFFERING I HATE FINAL EXAMS)
Anyways, enjoy.
And, as always, numbers in brackets are lap numbers.
(Disclaimer: Remember that this is just for shits and giggles, I'm not trying to actually hate on anyone here cuz all the drivers are very dear to me)
- IT'S LIGHTS OUT AND AWAY WE GO!
- Lando looses P1 almost immediately
- and drops down to P3 in the first corner
- That was horrible my man
- But DAMN where did George come from tho??
- No crashes so far
- Oop Ferraris touched actually, nevermind
- Max in the lead (3)
- Is it even worth it to keep watching
- Like we all know how this is gonna end
- Fuck it, never say never
- Lando is back in George's DRS window (7)
- Somehow Fernando dropped down to P14
- Lando is slowly creeping up on George
- First pitstops happening already (Guanyu and Yuki) (10)
- Oscar is literally up Pierre's rear
- Haas fucking up yet another pitstop
- Oh brother I can see the negative points in my F1 Fantasy already
- Kevin apparently did a false start (this seems familiar)
- Max binned it in turn 7 (13)
- Which we never got to see btw
- Alpine fucked up Pierre's pitstop
- Kevin gets a 5-Second-Penalty (now hold on...)
- George in Pit (16)
- Mercedes also fucked up George's pitstop
- What's in Barcelona's air today lmao
- Lando is 8 tenths faster than Max
- Max comes in (17)
- 1,9 second pitstop😵
- Rejoins in fourth
- Carlos is complaining a lot today
- Stop yapping bro, DRIVE
- I'm scared of McLaren's strategy
- I need to go to the restroom but if I've learnt anything it is that something crucial happens if I do.
- Oscar in pit (22)
- Oscar flying past Nico (23)
- Lando pitstop (23)
- Rejoins in sixth
- Lando fastest lap (26)
- Lando closing in on Carlos
- Aaaand he's gone!
- Oscar overtakes Checo easily (28)
- "Tires are very inconsistent" - Max (30)
- OH?
- Lando is getting ready to overtake Lewis
- Gets by easily (32)
- Oscar flies through the field
- Lando is up in P2!
- But George ain't giving up without a fight
- Fight! (36)
- They're side by side for like half the lap
- Lando wins the squabble (37)
-George fastest lap (39)
- Checo is in P10 btw (38)
- I give up, I need to use the restroom
- Nothing happened, nice.
- Lapping starts (42)
- Max pitstop (44)
- Lando is speeding away
- Mom I'm scared
- Lando boxes (47)
- Rejoins P2!!!
- Nico gets a penalty for speeding in the pitlane
- 7 second gap to Max
- Is it too soon to say I can hear the Dutch anthem playing already?
- Wait hold on Lando is actually gaining
- Yuki also gets a penalty for speeding in the pitlane
- 15 laps to go!
- Lewis in P3!
- Max is pulling away again😮‍💨
- Alex bins it (60)
- My hopes are dead
- Max won
- silently fuming
- Not only because Lando didn't win but because somehow Oscar was kinda forgotten again? Correct me if I'm wrong here tho
- At least Lando got DotD
- AND LEWIS PODIUM!
- Everyone actually finished🤯
- This race was... meh.
- Not a single yellow flag, no safety car, no carnage.
- Only plenty of overtakes and battles
- Some of them were GODLIKE but still...
- Turned off the broadcast as soon as the podium celebrations started
- I do NOT want to hear the Dutch anthem rn
- I cannot physically handle hearing it I will cry
- Lando didn't do his signature champagne celebration apparently - very understandable.
- But at least he's second in the WDC now🥹
- inhaling the copium
- ... feel free to add on!
... Yeah. A rollercoaster of emotions, this one.
But hey! My homerace is next! YIPPEE! See ya in Spielberg!
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rallamajoop · 1 year ago
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Resident Evil 6: When a franchise has an identity crisis
I can’t tell you RE6 is a better game than RE5, but if nothing else, it’s a far more interesting failure.
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RE6 is famously the game that tried so hard to appeal to everyone that it wound up appealing to no-one: overlong, overproduced and utterly OTT. RE5 left the franchise at a crossroads: the previous two games were huge successes, but drew criticism for straying from the series’ horror roots. Faced with the choice of doubling down on the new direction or diverting back towards something more survival horror, Capcom attempted to do both, at once, and then some.
The new RE6 would have three different main campaigns (Chris & Piers, Leon & Helena, and Jake & Sherry), all aimed at different markets, plus a fourth which would unlock only after the previous three were completed, which was to be different again. It would have something for everyone! Provided ‘everyone’ wanted a co-op shooter experience with ALL the explosions, or was prepared to play through three different extended co-op experiences just to unlock the one that was kinda more designed to be played solo. Completing that fourth campaign would also be essential to ever finding out what the fuck was going on during those first three. How could that go wrong?
RE6 is, in other words, exactly what happens when a franchise has an identity crisis.
Experienced purely on the level of plot and cutscenes, RE6 remains hard to rate overall because while there are parts of this game I genuinely enjoyed in a way nothing in RE5 could boast, so many other parts of were legitimately uncomfortable to sit through, and in ways owing less to effective horror than to gratuitous, ugly misery porn.
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Watch, as these bit characters you barely know die in horrible, gruesome ways in front of people who care about them! Watch! As Helena is finally reunited with the infected sister she committed treason to save, just in time to watch her beloved Deborah transform into a horrific butt-naked-lady monster who will spend the ensuing boss fight posing sexily while her tits show off their jiggle physics! It’s so traumatic for poor Helena, you have no idea!
Watch! As Chris reaches desperately for the outstretched fingers of StarryEyed McNewKid in the final seconds before his body erupts into a monster cocoon! Chris, dude, how long have you been in this business? He’s not falling off a rooftop, Chris! Grabbing his hand is not going to help!
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It would all be hilarious if it wasn’t also all so skin-crawlingly unpleasant. There’s something uniquely gross about how these scenes play out, and largely not in the fun way.
With all four campaigns down, the big secret behind devastating bio-terror outbreaks in three different locations around the world turns out to be that some member of the Actual Illuminati gets Big Mad that Ada Wong won’t put out, and converts a loyal scientist (Carla) into an Ada-clone, who promptly sets out to end the world in a fit of clone-angst. There’s a bit more going on in some of the individual campaigns – Illuminati Dude also sets up a plot to kill the US president so he can’t reveal the truth about Raccoon City (whatever that means), then frames Leon and Helena for it. He’s also sent Sherry out to find Wesker’s son, whose blood may be the one cure for their latest alphabet-virus, Sherry little realising who she’s really working for. And the real Ada’s around too – you can tell her apart by how the clone doesn’t wear enough red to be the real deal.
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Among the many problems with this game are that Illuminati Dude and clone!Ada are our only real villains, and neither are up to the franchise standard. Ada is just too well-established a character to work as the kind of villain who just wants-to-watch-the-world-burn – you can see the twist coming long, tiring hours before it hits. And Simmons (Illuminati Dude) just does not have any of the personality that makes people remember villains like Wesker or Salazar. There is some impressive creature design in this game – some of the boss monsters are far more memorable than the villains. But by this stage of franchise-transformation, your base level infected-enemy is just a generic guy with a machine gun and maybe an extra couple of eyes up close. It's a military shooter with occasional monsters, expecting you to mow down mooks without stopping for breath.
Speaking of military shooters, Chris has a campaign too, but for the life of me I could not tell you anything in it that matters to anyone else. He runs around a few locations, he fights a lot of monsters, completely fails to stop a missile launch, and loses people in the field. In the wake of RE5, the new game has honed in on the one defining feature of Chris’ character, Man With Lots Of Feelings About Losing People In The Field, and doubled down. Chris loses a lot of people in the field in this game.
The four campaigns in this game are separate enough that I’m going to talk about them that way, so let’s start with Chris.
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Chris and Piers
Like the franchise as a whole, Chris is in the midst of his own identity crisis. Is running from place to place, fighting monsters and losing so many people in the field really his whole life now? Yes, Chris. Yes, it is. I don’t know what else to tell you.
As much shade as this game gets for not being proper horror, there’s a case to be made that Chris’ campaign is absolutely a horror story, just one about the specific horrors of toxic masculinity. Aww, Chris, are you having an alcohol-fuelled, amnesic breakdown after traumatically losing your whole team in the field? You think maybe you could use some therapy, some downtime? Well fuck you, Chris, what you need is for the one survivor of your big fuck-up to come yell at you, drag your amnesic ass back to base and give you a whole new team. Then you can go lose them all in the field again, this time down to the very last man, so you can learn how to be a fucking man about it! MEN DON’T GET TO HAVE FEELINGS!!
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Chris persists in having feelings nonetheless, mostly rage and denial. By the end game, poor Chris is about half a breakdown away from the point where he could see his whole team smeared into a bloody pulp, and would still have to be dragged away screaming “noooooo we can still save them!!!” The sheer hilarity can only temper the misery so far.
Watch as Chris solemnly retrieves the C4 cartridge that is all that was left of the last (non-playable) survivor of the second team he’s lost this game, which game text will dutifully label as Marco’s C4. Watch the sadness in Chris’ eyes as he slaps it onto a door and blows it open! (That was Marco’s C4, Piers! He loved that C4! He took it everywhere with him! Now it’s as burned and blackened as he is!)
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If you’re here for testosterone poisoning, Chris and Piers’ campaign is here for you. Up to this point in the series, one of Chris’ few vaguely-distinguishing features was how many women there were in his life, and how he generally managed not to be weird about that – Jill, Claire, Sheva, even Rebecca. In RE6, Chris is a man’s man in a man’s world, full of men – no lady partners around to slow down this Redfield!
Chris interacts with all of three women in the whole game, and is one of those is him telling a barmaid ‘Listen, sweetheart, you’re here to pour drinks and look pretty’ when she tries to cut him off during his drunken-amnesic opening sequence. Chris spends the rest of the game hunting clone!Ada after she gruesomely murders his first team in front of him. He never gets his final showdown with her. He never finds out she’s a clone. But he sure does get into a big punch-up with Leon when Leon has the gall to suggest they need to bring “Ada” in alive, not in a body bag (the clone herself slips away while they’re still arguing).
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Chris does manage to be nicer to Sherry, at least, but his biggest interaction with Jake is similarly testosterone-laden. If you play these campaigns in their intended order, you’ll have the big Wesker-junior-reveal exposed for you in other people’s dialogue long before you’ll ever see Jake find out for himself. Chris decides this means he absolutely has to let Jake know that I Killed Your Father at the first possible opportunity, never mind that the lives of millions could hang on whether he and Jake can get on long enough to get out alive. He and Jake very nearly come to blows over it.
It’s all so ridiculous that even Piers calls him out on it; Chris simply insists that Jake “had a right to know.” Sure, but why now? For which matter, why would Jake suddenly care about the death of the evil, asshole deadbeat he hates so much? Oh, let’s not kid ourselves, it’s all because the writers wanted their big, tense, manly, “I killed your daddy!”-confrontation, and were going to shoehorn it in at any cost.
And yet, for all the bullshit that is Chris’ manly, manly campaign, I can’t completely hate it, because there’s this one bit at the end where Piers injects himself with a virus in a desperate moment, and promptly grows a giant mutant arm that shoots lightning. Like, if you are playing as Piers, you get to wield his mutant lightning arm through the remaining combat scenes.
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The game even throws up a bunch of lightning-destructible barriers after the big boss battle just to give you more to do with it. I mean, how can you not love a thing like that? It’s amazing.
More importantly, why the fuck is there not more use of Piers’ horrifying lightning-shooting monster-arm in Chris/Piers fanfic? Do you all not see how 100% DTF Chris would be if he thought it had even a chance of helping convince Piers his monster-arm wasn’t so bad and he didn’t need to nobly stay behind to die? You can’t experience this game and tell me this isn’t the moment Chris has been building up for the whole damn campaign! Am I going to have to write monster-fucker!Chris myself?
Ahem.
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Leon and Helena
Leon’s campaign does not start in a bar, comfortably far from the action. It starts in a presidential office, where Leon is already pointing a gun at the zombified PotUS, who is even now eating another victim.
“Don’t make me do this!” Leon begs, demonstrating that Chris has absolutely set the standard for seasoned-pros-still-living-in-absurd-denial that we can expect from everyone in this mad game. Leon, c’mon – wake up and smell the decomposition! Fuck, your boss is so far gone already they can probably smell him from the building next door!
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Leon seems to be working presidential security, but he can’t be doing a very good job, considering that not only has the president been zombified on his watch, there’s a woman with a drawn firearm standing next to him in the president’s presence, and (in one of many record-scratch moments) we’re about to find out Leon hasn’t a clue who she is. Other games might have spent some time leading up to this moment, establishing how Leon, Helena and the ex-pres all got into this position. They might even have given us a scene or two to set up Leon’s relationship with said president, a man whose death has apparently been so traumatic that Leon’s forgotten everything he ever knew about zombies (and take note that this isn’t even Ashley’s-dad-the-president, it’s apparently some completely new guy, so even franchise vets are coming in blind). But not RE6! RE6 gives us a few seconds of flashback-montage right before Leon pulls the trigger, and gets right back to its regular schedule of misery porn.
Helena mutters, “It’s all my fault!” but refuses to elaborate in any way until they reach this cathedral on the other side of town (naturally hiding some kind of biotech lab facility) where it will all become clear. It takes a long time to get to the cathedral, however, because there’s a zombie outbreak in progress, and Leon and Helena keep stopping to watch people die.
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There’s a man who wants help looking for his daughter! “We don’t have time!” says Helena. “We’ll make time!” says Leon. Well, they sure do make time to watch that newly-zombified daughter eat her father in a horrific scene. Yay! Later, they find a security feed showing a couple of helpless civilians desperately waving “HELP” signs at a security camera, like there’s going to be anyone checking security feeds in the midst of the zombie apocalypse. Leon watches the feed. The civilians persist in waving signs in one of those awkward video-game animation cycles. Leon watches some more. The signs wave some more. Finally, “we should go help them!” says Leon, as zombies show up to eat everyone present. Helena points out it may be a little late. It’s all so hilarible it hurts.
There’s no good reason why Helena can’t explain anything until they get to the cathedral. All she needs to say is that she’s a federal agent whose sister was taken hostage to force her to cooperate with the villains responsible for the president’s death, and who've been making bioweapons in a secret lab under the cathedral. You could question why a major bio-terror outbreak was necessary for one little act of political assassination, but because this is the Resident Evil universe, any evil worth doing is worth doing with zombies.
You could question exactly what Helena was forced to do, but the game isn’t interested in any of that logical plot stuff. You could question exactly why whatever the president was about to reveal about Raccoon City was worth a political assassination, but the game isn’t interested in politics either. We’re going to the cathedral! It’ll all be much easier to explain there! (It won’t be, we’re not here to explain anything.)
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It doesn’t really get better from here. Leon’s campaign is, in short, an epic mess. But I can’t completely hate it, because despite all the bullshit material he’s working with, I am kind of into this take on Leon. This is a Leon who’s older, cooler and more sophisticated, and it just gets me something ridiculous. I’ve seen complaints from fans of the original RE4 who weren’t happy he’s more serious and has less goofy one-liners, which is probably fair – Leon still gets some good ones in, but Jake is hoarding most of the real one-liners in this game, and Leon does come across kind of absurdly over-earnest in a lot of early scenes. He's not going to be to everyone's taste.
But frankly, I’ll take this Leon over RE4’s any day. He feels so much closer to the version in the new games I fell for so hard (and not just because he can actually work with women without being weird about it). He also looks amazing in a suit and still has great chemistry with (real) Ada, and good god, they should just run away together already, those combined genetics would produce the coolest babies imaginable, you just try and tell me they wouldn’t!
And, y'know, sue me, but I kinda liked Helena too. I could do without the police-brutality backstory that she gets in documents, but she's a woman who has fucked up big time, who knows it, and is trying to make up for it, and that kind of complicated tends to be what gives me most of my female faves in this franchise.
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Jake & Sherry
Much as I enjoyed Leon and Helena though, their campaign at large is still a pretty miserable slog. And having already sat through two long campaigns of indifferent misery porn, I can’t tell you what a breath of fresh air it was it reach Jake and Sherry’s story and realise, oh my god, I’m actually having a good time! They’re actually having some fun together! They have such great chemistry! Jake even has an actual character arc where he looks back on his life with new eyes and real drive to become a better person! Did I accidentally switch to a whole different game?
Jake (aka Wesker Junior) is the kind of character who shouldn’t work: an above-it-all edgelord mercenary asshole who sounds like everything wrong with this game in a nutshell. His reaction to discovering he might be carrying the cure to a zombie plague is to cheerfully put a price on his own blood in the millions. And yet, he’s refreshingly not awful to Sherry, quickly get attached to her and develops a great dynamic, and he’s young enough that he’s out of his depth a lot in the world of bio-terrorism, and not too uptight to admit it.
Finding out his father was none other than Wesker prompts some serious self-reflection, but we’re not going to watch him spend the rest of the game angsting over it, and even through all the horror he mostly seems to be having a good time. Jake’s great.
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My only serious complaint about this campaign is that it’d be nice if they’d given Sherry a little more personality beyond being Jake’s no-nonsense handler. I like that she’s grown up from rescued-little-damsel into trusted agent, that she’s competent and comfortable enough with the world of bio-terror that nothing really fazes her (even if the game does get a little patronising about having Jake tackle her out of danger repeatedly), but she’s stuck being the straight-man to Jake’s wilder personality, and that’s just a bit disappointing.
For someone whose parents were neglectful Umbrella scientists responsible for throwing her into a world of horrific childhood trauma, Sherry comes across like she’s never questioned an authority figure in her life since, and that just doesn’t ring true to me. But at least she and Jake get to have friendly interactions with Leon and Helena, because god knows Chris and Piers can't ever be invited to a group cutscene without one of them having to hold the other back.
I can’t say whether I’d have enjoyed Jake’s storyline nearly so much had I not suffered through Chris and Leon’s first, but Jake’s feels like a far more complete story than either of the previous – and there’s a refreshing lack of stopping-to-watch-people-die-horribly. I don’t feel like I’m missing a preceding act’s worth of set-up, and clone!Ada has a smaller role, so the fact Sherry and Jake never find out what her deal is doesn’t feel like it leaves their story critically unfinished.
Which brings us to Ada’s campaign.
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Ada
So here’s where we learn that the Ada in the purple dress is a clone created by that one Illuminati Dude she ghosted after he got too clingy. And by ‘we learn’ I mean ‘just the real Ada learns’, because god knows Chris and Leon never find out – and one can only imagine the kind of furious arguments they’re going to have over Ada’s character, motives, and whether she’s even alive or not after the events of the game. Even Ada only finds out her clone exists because the clone insists on trying to best her original, in that classic clone-angst way.
I have such conflicted feelings about Ada’s portrayal in this game. I’d like to be able to enjoy how unflappably cool she is, even when faced with evidence that the Literal Illuminati may be trying to make her the scapegoat for the apocalypse. But the reality is that Ada flaps so little she’s utterly one-note here – like, if you thought the RE4 remake Ada was a little limited in range, RE6 is exactly that, only more so, for much longer. Surely she should at least be annoyed that someone with Chris’ connections thinks she’s directly responsible for major bio-terror outbreaks in multiple countries? A little flap or two would go an awful long way here.
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The most memorable part of Ada’s campaign is her final showdown with Carla, her clone – who mutates into a monster so huge and horrific that she basically becomes the whole battle stage, and it’s fantastically creepy and fucked-up (in a way I can actually enjoy, for a change). But most of the rest of Ada’s campaign is her wandering through her scheduled appearances in other characters’ stories, and there’s just not much of interest going on there. Time to fight all those same bosses that keep coming back over and over again!
A lot of what makes RE6 ultimately so unsatisfying is that in the end, thousands or millions of people have died around the world because of what amounts to bullshit illuminati infighting, well beyond the ken of any of the heroes running around the edges doing damage control. Even when Chris finally catches up with the Ada clone, it’s only to see her shot down by mysterious men in a black helicopter who just fly away out of the story again as inexplicably as they entered.
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The clone’s not dead, of course – she gets right back up again in time for her boss fight with Ada. There’s no need for the helicopter in this scene at all – letting the Ada clone throw herself off the rooftop without being shot would have served the same narrative purpose. But throwing in an Illuminati drive-by shooting sure does underline how little real agency any of the heroes really have, when the world can be brought to the brink of a bio-terror apocalypse because one rich, white man couldn’t deal with the fact a woman said no to him.
No-one other than Ada even seems interested in the real truth: no-one asks who was flying the helicopter, or ends their campaign with any ‘time to get the rest of those Illuminati bastards’-declaration. Had RE6 been a smash-hit success, I don’t doubt that some kind of get-the-Illuminati plot would have come up in the sequel, but as it stands, Chris and Leon seem unbothered by being mere pawns in the schemes of the unknowably powerful. That’s not much of a happy note to end on.
In the end, the best thing about RE6 is that its reception was so tepid that it led directly to the IP being almost completely reinvented for RE7. And without a trainwreck on the scale of RE6, that might not have happened.
For all the parts of this story I like enough to wish they’d appeared in a better game, it’s hard to call RE6 any kind of success. But it’s at least an interesting failure – a fascinatingly awful trainwreck of an experience – and that’s at least something worth talking about.
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ahquadthesecond · 2 years ago
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I think Dean does this thing where he thinks his job is an excuse for every other thing going wrong in his life. Every flaw in him is a result of him being in the hunting business.
He drinks too much? Comes with the job. He has a horrible attitude most of the time? Comes with the job. He's emotionally constipated? Comes with the job. His complete disregard for his physical and mental well-being? Comes with the job. His bottled up rage that comes out in waves and consumes him entirely until he does something that's so messed up he can never come back from it? Comes with the job. His entire life is just about saving people and hunting things and absolutely nothing else? Comes with the freaking job!
I think that's because that was the kinda role model Dean had growing up. John was an absent father who made a lot of mistakes and Dean probably thought it was okay because Dad was on a mission. It was okay that he was never around for their birthday's or that he never cared about their feelings or never respected their choices. Because he had a job. And that's all that mattered.
So, that's how Dean grew up, I think. Constantly looking for a cause to fight for. A role to play. And as long as he had a mission, he didn't care about anything else. That's why we see him so driven. As long as he got the job done, everything else was just a distraction.
But Sam didn't grow up with John as his only role model. Sam had someone else. Someone who showed him that you can do the job and also be yourself. Sam saw Dean, going on hunting trips with their Dad but also never forgetting Sam's birthday; sneaking him away to the arcade every once in a while; respecting his choice to go to college and just being their for him in ways their father never was.
So, Sam grew up different. He didn't make his entire life about hunting. He had hobbies and little habits that made him 'normal'. He never let the job consume him. But it was Dean who taught him that. It was Dean who taught him that he could be a hunter and be his own person.
But Dean doesn't realise that because when he was looking after Sammy, that was his cause; that was his mission. Look after your brother. Everything else came second. And in a way, as Dean grew up, that cause just blended in with his "saving people" motto. Because that was all Dean cared about. Devoting himself to the cause. That's why he was always saying he wanted to go out swinging. On the job. Because, maybe, that's all Dean Winchester sees when he looks in the mirror: a tool for a cause. He never saw himself for what he was: a human. With real feelings and doubts and questions. Because all his life, he's just been told to follow orders and do things you don't like if the job called for it. And I don't think that cage he was in, ever went away. He was always trapped in his cause: saving people, hunting things, the family business.
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helloalycia · 3 years ago
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a bitch [one] // leigh shaw
summary: you're used to leigh's constant mood swings and unpredictability, but didn't expect she'd ever do something to hurt you like she did.
warning/s: cheating
author's note: an angsty leigh shaw imagine was requested, so here we are! there's one more part to this so enjoy 😊
part two | masterlist | wattpad
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Leigh Shaw could be a very unpredictable woman.
Ever since the unfortunate death of her husband, Matt, she'd become very erratic. It was hard to remember what she was like before he died, but then she'd flash me a smile and say something adorable and I remembered. Other times though, she could be as explosive as they came. If you ever got swept up in her mood swings, you'd be screwed.
Despite this, I remained by her side. That's what best friends did. Even when she yelled at me or gave me the cold shoulder or treated me like dirt, I stayed because I knew that was what she needed.
One time, a few months after Matt's death, I was stopping by to see how she was. A prime example of the cold effect she could have on people.
I raised my hand to knock, but the door suddenly swung open, revealing a peeved Jules and a pissed Leigh further behind her in the hallway.
"Hey," I greeted her sister with a smile, but she moved past me moodily. I glanced at Leigh before catching Jules' arm, stopping her. "What happened?"
Jules smiled bitterly. "You know, you should reconsider where you put your care, Y/N. Some people just aren't worth it."
At that last part, she glared over my shoulder, no doubt at Leigh. I turned to look at Leigh, who merely stuck a middle finger up at her sister before storming towards to the kitchen.
"What a bitch," Jules mumbled, making me wince because it was such a horrible word.
Jules shook me off before marching to her car to leave. I sighed and turned around to let myself in to their house. Closing the door behind me, I followed after Leigh and found her making toast in the kitchen angrily.
"Hey," I began softly, not wanting to give her another reason to get pissed off. Sitting on a stool at the island, I asked, "What happened?"
She forced a smile as she grabbed her toast from the toaster and dropped it on a plate. "My sister can't respect my space is all."
I pursed my lips awkwardly, watching as she grabbed butter from the fridge. Noticing my silence, she glanced up at me through her eyelashes.
"What?" she deadpanned, pausing from her actions.
"I don't think Jules is trying to upset you," I began, knowing I'd probably regret it. "I'm sure she understands you want space, but she loves you. And when you see someone you love hurting, you feel like you have to do something."
A sour smile broke out on her face as she scoffed. "Wow. Could you have your head stuck any further up Jules' arse?"
"Leigh, that's not what I'm–"
"What the hell are you even doing here?" she snapped. "I didn't invite you, Y/N."
Tensing my jaw, I refrained from getting annoyed. "Believe it or not, I actually wanted to check on you."
She curled her lips into a frown. "Well, I'm fine."
As if to prove that she was, she continued to butter her toast, but when she set her knife down, it slipped off the edge of the table and clattered to the floor. Frustrated, she slammed a fist on the countertop.
"It's okay, I'll–"
"Just get out," she cut me off when I was making a move to help her. I paused, wondering if she meant it, then her deadly green glare settled on my face. "Leave."
Sighing with defeat, I nodded and wordlessly left.
Sometimes Leigh wouldn't apologise. She'd act like nothing had happened and we'd move on. Other times, she actually would, surprisingly recognising that she'd done something wrong.
There was this one time when I'd invited her over for the evening to eat dinner and watch some films. The dinner went perfectly fine – we talked, we laughed, we spent time together – but then when we settled in the living room to watch a film, things started to unravel.
I can't remember exactly what she'd said. One second we were choosing a film on Netflix, then she was trying to make plans with me on the weekend. Unfortunately, I already had plans with my girlfriend, Alex, and Leigh didn't seem to like this. She'd made a comment under her breath and though I don't remember it specifically, I knew it wasn't polite.
Before I knew it, we were screaming at each other, arguing over the dumbest things. It started off being about my girlfriend and then the most unrelated stuff was being brought up on both of our ends. Sometimes she could be so aggravating, managing to rile me up and bring the worst out in me. The argument lasted a few minutes before she left, leaving me seething and full of hurt.
It was the following day at work when she came to see me next. I owned a café a few doors down from her mother's dance studio and was working a shift when her sister came through the front door.
I smiled at her when she approached the counter dressed in gym gear, her usual getup when at work with her family.
"Hey, how're you doing, Jules?" I asked.
"I'm good," she greeted with a smile, before it faded. "Just a warning, Y/N, Leigh is incoming in one minute. She wants to apologise."
Eyes rolling with mild annoyance, I let out a sigh. As dreadful as our spat was last night, I knew I had to also apologise to her. I'd said some hurtful things that made me feel all icky inside. Going to sleep after a fight was never a nice feeling.
"I don't know how you've put up with her for this long," Jules commented, picking up a cupcake from the display. "She can be so horrible to you."
I frowned, not feeling comfortable talking badly of Leigh behind her back. "That's not fair, Jules. You know what she's going through."
Jules gave me a knowing look. "I do, but that doesn't give her a free pass to treat you like she does."
Shrugging, I busied myself with cleaning up the crumbs from Jules' cupcake and giving her a plate.
"I take it you're going to forgive her then," she stated, though she definitely knew the answer judging from her expression.
"We both said some things we shouldn't have," I tried to explain so it didn't seem like I was giving in so easily, which deep down, I definitely knew I was, but Leigh was worth it.
Jules chuckled. "Yep, you're forgiving her. Looks like it's Leigh's lucky day."
I didn't say anything as she picked up the plate, ready to take a seat at one of the tables. Just as she was about to leave, she paused thoughtfully.
"You know, if you didn't have a girlfriend already, I'd say you were whipped," she said casually.
Ignoring her words, I watched her take her a seat on one of the spare tables. She made jokes like that a lot, but the truth was that I would probably do anything for Leigh. We'd been best friends since university – that was way too long to simply throw away our friendship because she was going through a tough time. And yes, the girlfriend talk threw me off at times... by the time I'd realised I liked Leigh as more than a friend, she was engaged. And I got over it, but Jules continued with the jokes and I continued to dismiss it.
As Jules warned, Leigh entered the café and caught my eyes with a nervous smile. I returned it, just as nervous as she looked, before watching her approach the counter. She was dressed in gym gear, like her sister, but a fine layer of sweat coated her skin which made me think she may have just finished teaching a class.
"Hey," she said with a rare gentleness to her voice. Her hands rested on the counter, fumbling slightly, before she put them by her sides instead. "How are you?"
Uncomfortably, I played with a loose thread on my apron. "I've been better, not gonna lie."
She exhaled regretfully. "I want to apologise, Y/N. Last night... it wasn't fair what I did. Just snapping at you like that."
I didn't know what to say, so I stayed quiet and avoided her eyes.
"I just get so angry sometimes," she admitted, noticing I wouldn't speak. She sounded exhausted and I looked up to see her running a hand through her hair. "I can't explain it. My anger at you wasn't about Alex or the plans, it was just me."
"It's because you're still hurting," I told her what I'd observed, shoulders relaxing. "And you're not very good at expressing that."
She shook her head, eyes drifting to the till distractedly. "I should be because I keep hurting the people I love."
My heart ached at the devastation in her voice and I put my hand out, motioning for her to take it. Thankfully, she did and I squeezed hers gently.
"Look, let's just forget it happened," I said with a small smile. "I... I didn't exactly say the nicest of things either."
She grimaced, letting go of my hand. "No, I get why you said it. It wasn't fair of me to just start on you like that. You were just defending your girlfriend... God, I can be such a bitch sometimes."
I winced at the word, it grating my ears. "That's not true, Leigh."
"It is." She nodded slowly, rolling her eyes. "Everybody thinks it. Including you."
"I don't think that," I said with creased brows, meeting her saddened eyes. "You're not a bitch. I've never once thought that."
"Really?" She raised a brow, smiling with defeat. "Not even that time when I stole your doughnuts after that fight we had two weeks ago?"
I shook my head. "Nope."
"Not even when I snapped at you for no reason the other day when you tried to help me write my article?"
"Not even then."
Her expression softened with guilt. "Not even when I called you a selfish jerk last night for not wanting to spend time with me even though you have a life of your own?"
I rounded the counter and stopped before her, looking between her guilt-ridden eyes. "Especially not then, Leigh."
She breathed out quietly and I pulled her in for a hug, glad when I felt her relax beneath me. Her arms clasped around my waist and I was glad we were good again.
It was a year later when Leigh and I eventually got together as a couple. It was a long time after I broke up with my girlfriend and it was completely unexpected.
I'd invited Leigh to be my 'date' to my mum's birthday party, since the two had gotten on so well in the past. She was happy to oblige, but as soon as we arrived, her mood changed.
I was helping collect the pizzas from the delivery guy when he started to flirt with me. At the time, I didn't even realise, but I knew that Leigh had acted different since it happened. When I finally confronted her about her sudden mood swing, she proceeded to make out with me completely unexpectedly and then admitted she was in love with me.
I'm not gonna lie, it was a good time. Since breaking up with my girlfriend, I'd been single and falling for my best friend all over again. Leigh making the first move was all I'd needed to finally share how I felt, too.
That was six months ago, and since then, we'd been going strong. Of course, there were still times when she had her mood swings and took it out on me (and literally everyone else) without realising, but it wasn't anything I couldn't handle. I was used to it, used to her. So much that I should have trusted her even when presented with conflicting evidence.
We were at her workplace, Basically News, where she wrote columns part-time. It was a work party she'd been invited to and she'd asked me to be her date, which of course I said yes to. At the moment, we may or may not have been a little tipsy as we stood in the corner, drinking from flutes of champagne.
"Thank you again for coming here tonight as my date," Leigh said with a grin, arms laced around my neck as she held me close.
Pressing a kiss to my lips briefly, she pulled away and left my head spinning, and not just because of the alcohol.
"Any excuse to not be on the closing shift at work is good enough for me," I said playfully, resting my hands behind her waist.
She gasped. "Oh? So it wasn't me who persuaded you to come tonight?"
I pulled a face, feigning forgetfulness. "Hmm, I'm not too sure. Maybe you'll have to remind me why I agreed to come."
She bit her lip to contain her grin, eyes flickering to my lips. Leaning in, her lips met mine and I closed my eyes, enjoying the way she combed her hand through my hair and tilted my head towards her so she could get better access. She was a really good kisser and she knew the effect she had on me as I felt her smirk into it, catching her breath, before chasing down my lips and nibbling on them temptingly.
Remembering where we were, I gently pushed her back and tried to contain my smile. "Make it PG, Leigh. You're at work."
She licked her lips and began to laugh, green eyes darting between mine. "You're just so cute."
I rolled my eyes playfully. "I don't want everyone here knowing how irresistible you are or they might try to steal you away."
Her laughter filled the air, making my stomach flip at the sound.
"Though I think they may already know that because of how sexy you look tonight," I added, eyes fluttering down her body to appreciate just how well she pulled off her fitted black dress.
She raised her brows with surprise, making me mirror her expression comically.
Leaning close to my ear, she said above a whisper, "D'you wanna know something not-so-sexy?"
Her breath tickled my ear and sent shivers down my spine, making me tense up slightly. Judging from the expression on her face, she was very much aware of what she was doing to me.
"What?" I asked with amusement.
"I really need to pee," she said, and I began to laugh because she did, too, and I knew she wasn't kidding. Pressing a kiss to my cheek, she added, "I'll be right back."
Letting go of me, she waved goodbye before going to the toilets. I busied myself with getting to know her colleagues whilst I waited, until five minutes had passed and I realised she still hadn't returned. Deciding to check on her, I headed in the direction of the toilets, only to freeze when I saw something I definitely wasn't expecting.
Leigh was kissing another girl outside of them.
It was her colleague, Abby, that was the first thing I noticed. But I didn't stay to make out anything more as I immediately turned around and walked away, trying to make my brain catch up to what I'd just seen.
Leigh was kissing somebody else. Somebody that wasn't me. Somebody who I had always suspected had a thing for her, but I never considered that maybe Leigh had a thing for her, too.
Definitely not tipsy anymore, I found the nearest table and took a seat, trying not to assume the worst. But how else could I perceive what I'd just seen? It could have been a mistake, though I was so shocked and hurt and angry that I couldn't imagine how. Maybe she'd explain herself to me. Or maybe she'd tell me what actually happened. Maybe.
Leigh returned not long after, finding me at the table. Smiling like nothing had happened, she pulled me up and led me to dance. Not once, for the remainder of the evening, did she suggest that anything was out of the ordinary, nor did she explain herself. And I couldn't help but wonder how I had the worst luck with women.
This one hurt way more than the last time because it wasn't just anyone – it was Leigh.
A year and a half ago:
"Danny mentioned the breakdown you had last week because they didn't have doughnuts, so I, er, brought you these just in case."
Leigh cracked a small smile in the passenger's seat before accepting the box I held out to her. I'd just parked up outside the place where she went to her grief counselling group, having offered to drop her off. It had only been a few months since Matt died, but sometimes, the old Leigh shone back through and it made me feel hopeful that she'd make it through this.
"Thank you," she said genuinely, fingers wavering on top of the box, before she lifted her gaze to meet mine. "And thanks for the ride. You didn't have to."
I shrugged, thumb tapping the steering wheel mindlessly. "I don't mind. I just wanna make sure you get here okay."
She sighed, shaking her head, though a ghost of a smile was on her lips.
"Text me when you're done and I'll be happy to pick you up, too," I added casually.
"Thanks," she repeated, though didn't make a move to leave my car just yet. I didn't rush her.
Sadly, the silence was broken when my phone began to ring and my girlfriend's name flashed on the screen in my car where my phone was connected to. Glancing at Leigh, I just about made out the eye-roll she did.
"Sorry," I apologised, before declining the call instantly.
"Why d'you do that? Could've been urgent," she said with a clipped tone.
Oh, no, I thought. Whenever she used that tone, it meant she was picking a fight.
"I'm here with you," I said like it was obvious, hoping that one thing didn't ruin the moment.
She tensed her jaw, looking down as her hair fell around her face. "Whatever."
Before I could think of a way to make her feel better, the screen lit up again and my ringtone echoed through the car. I winced at the glare Leigh sent to the screen. If looks could kill, my car would be toast.
Declining the call, I looked to her worriedly. "What's wrong, Leigh?"
Her glare fell to me. "Why the hell do you keep declining it? She's calling you for a reason."
I raised my eyebrows. "Because I'm here with you? Alex can wait. I'm taking you to grief group."
"Well, I'm here at grief group," she mocked, turning to face me with an unexplainable frustration.
I didn't understand why she was so touchy all of a sudden. The car ride here, she'd been fine. Just a moment ago, she'd been fine. But now... now she was acting unreasonable.
My phone buzzed in my pocket suddenly, followed by a tone that signalled I had a text. Leigh smiled bitterly, rolling her eyes.
"Let me guess," she muttered. "It's her."
Still very much unable to keep up with her mood swings, I didn't answer. Her gaze snapped to mine as she stared at me with disbelief.
"Why the fuck aren't you checking it?!"
I grimaced, my own exasperation slipping out when I blurted, "I'm a little confused to what you want from me right now, Leigh!" Breathing out slowly, I said, "I'm sorry if this is bothering you. I'll turn off my phone next time."
As if I'd deeply offended her, she raised a brow incredulously. "Are you kidding me? Why would this bother me?"
Okay, I was extremely confused now.
"I don't know," I admitted, bewildered.
"Is that what you think of me? Some clingy bitch who won't let you live your life?"
I widened my eyes. "What?! Leigh! I never said–"
"Sorry if taking me is such a task," she said abruptly, moving to put the box of doughnuts on the dashboard.
"I never said that," I told her sternly.
"You didn't have to. I know already. I'm just a burden on everyone."
She got out of the car and slammed the door shut behind her. Meanwhile, my confusion was still trying to make out what the hell just happened.
"Don't bother picking me up," she said through the open window of the passenger's door. A scowl was on her face as she added, "You should go spend time with Alex. She's probably missing you."
Breathing out, I leaned back into my seat and watched her walk away and to the entrance of the building. When she acted like this – so push and pull with her emotions – I was so conflicted. What could possibly be going on in her mind that she managed to flip everything that just happened? A complete 180?
Knowing she'd just need some time to cool off, I shook my head and focused on leaving. But then I remembered my phone went off and pulled it out to see what was so important. Aside from two missed calls from Alex, I saw I had a voicemail, too, not a text.
Grumbling fo myself, still disgruntled by Leigh's attitude, I raised the phone to my ear to have a listen, whilst hoping it wasn't actually anything life-threatening.
At first, all I could hear was some very faint laughing and vague noises, kind of like material rubbing together and breathing. I assumed Alex had left me a voicemail without even realising since I'd done that countless of times to other people, having dropped my phone in my bag without realising it was still on. But then the noises became more distinct and I made out words.
"Jake, stop messing about," a voice said, whom I instantly recognised as my girlfriend.
I furrowed my brows. Jake? Jake as in the guy she worked with Jake?
"If you stop teasing me then maybe I will," a gravelly yet devious voice responded.
My throat went dry when I heard more laughter before it went quiet. It didn't take a genius to understand what was happening, especially when the moans that followed echoed in my ear, begging me not to forget.
Unable to listen anymore, I hung up and threw my phone onto the passenger's seat. Tears welled in my eyes as I glanced over at it hesitantly, almost wishing it hadn't even existed. And as much as I didn't want to accept the glaring fact, it hit me like a ton of bricks.
She was cheating on me.
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tsrookie · 3 years ago
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Always In My Heart
Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Alyssa Brooks)
A/N: On today’s episode of ‘I have no idea wtf I’m doing’, we have something that I cooked up because I had terrible WiFi and no other app but Google docs would open up.
Trope: Fluff, but a tiny bit of angst?
Rating: General
Word Count: 2.3K
Warning(s): Mentions of character death
Summary: Their son has a very important question to ask.
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The delicious aroma of chicken and rice wafted through the Brooks-Ramsey household. The couple worked side by side in the kitchen as they had all those years ago, the only difference being that it was now a dinner for five and not just two.
Allison Dolores Brooks-Ramsey came into their lives nine years ago, and while it was earlier than they would have wanted, they didn’t regret a second of their lives ever since they first heard her voice.
The twins on the other hand, were planned, but nothing had prepared them for the chaos that Nathan and Natalie would bring. A new broken object every week, a dozen fights for the TV every day, and yet were nothing short of tiny tornadoes when they joined forces.
It couldn’t be more perfect.
“What time did Jackie and Emilia say that they would bring the girls back?”
“6:30, I think.”
“Ah. So we have time till 7:00.” They shared a knowing smile. Two aunts taking their nine and six year old nieces to the mall meant a complete raid of the toy store, and a new guitar.
“You need to stop letting everyone spoil the girls just because you have a soft spot for them, Ethan. Ally’s grown old enough to understand that she has her daddy wrapped around her finger, and we don’t need Nat coming to that realisation as well.”
“I don’t- I can’t believe you would accuse me of not loving all my children equally!”, he exclaimed in mock offense.
“Mhmm. So why did I have to come up with an explanation to tell Nathan why his dad wasn’t on board with ordering dessert when he asked for it, but relented once his sisters kept bugging him for another five minutes?”
He opened his mouth in protest, but decided against saying anything for his own good. “Well what can I say? They’ve inherited their mother’s persuasiveness. And I can’t really say no to you, can I?”
Alyssa’s lips curved upwards at that. The playful look in her husband’s eyes caused her to finally break into a grin. “At least you’re self-aware.” Stuffing the rice into the bird she added, “But I can’t exactly tell our son that his dad is too in-love with his mom that he sees her in his daughters and hence can’t say no to them. He’d gag in disgust.”
He chuckled and wrapped his arms around her, resting his head in the crook of her neck. “That he would. Alright I’ll try a little harder to resist their charms. Wouldn’t want my only son to end up hating me.” He said it without a hint of worry over it becoming true someday. Over the years, he’d learned to put aside his fears of not being a good father, and with the help of some therapy, and Alyssa’s unwavering love and support, he’d locked up his insecurities in a box and let it sink to the bottom of the ocean.
They took the stuffed chicken and put it in the oven, washed their hands and plopped down on the couch for some rare downtime.
“Crap.”
“Everything okay?”
“Fred’s mom got called in, so she’s dropping Nate off on her way to work.”
Ethan sighed. “There goes the hour I planned to spend with my wife, who I barely get to spend enough time with these days.”
“I swear, you were never this busy when you were chief. I have no idea why my workload’s ten times bigger.”
“I do.” Ethan smiled with pride. “One usually does have a lot of work when they’re at the front lines of the battle for making free healthcare accessible for every single person in the country. My brilliant wife, though she could choose to leave most of the work to her very competent team, opts to take it all upon herself. So that’s probably the cause behind all the extra workload she complains about.”
She smirked and perched herself onto his lap. “Well your very brilliant wife also knows that you called my team very competent just to avoid hurting my feelings, and that you and I both know that they’ll be running around like headless chickens without me taking care of things.”
“I know, love. But you can still make them do a little more instead of working yourself to the bone while still making sure that you have at least one meal with the kids every day.”
She sighed. “Yeah, to make sure that they don’t forget what I look like.” She leaned in closer. “Besides, are we really going to spend our last few minutes of peace talking about work?”
Just as she uttered the words, the door burst open, and Nathan kicked off his shoes and jumped onto the couch as Alyssa slid down from Ethan’s lap. She shot him a look that very clearly meant What did I just say?
Ethan gave her an apologetic look and ruffled his son’s hair. “Hey buddy. How was your day at Fred’s? I know you wanted to spend more time with him.”
“I did, and we were just about to open his new LEGO set when Mrs. Watson told us that she had to run up to her office for some emergency meeting.”, he pouted. “But it was a nice day. We watched Thor: Ragnarok and Luca, and we would’ve watched another movie if his dad didn’t tell us that two movies were enough for a day.”
Alyssa shot him a mildly stern look. “Well he was right. You’re too young to have movie marathons just yet. Two are more than enough, unless you want to have a headache.”
“But mom, I’m not too young! I’m a big boy! I can swing along the monkey bars at the park faster than Natalie, and soon I’ll swing across buildings just like Spider-Man!”
“Well Spider-Man got bitten by a yucky spider before he swung across buildings. Do you want to be bitten by a gross and poisonous spider?”
“Mommy, not all spiders are gross and poisonous. Dad told me that when I was four and got scared of them at the zoo.”
She rolled her eyes. Leave it to her husband to convince her kids that insects were anything short of creepy and disgusting. In reality, they were, but as someone who ran a mile away at the sight of a butterfly, she wasn’t going to accept that.
“That’s right, Nate. Some of them are certainly very poisonous and dangerous, but that doesn’t mean that you should be scared of them. If you maintain your distance and admire them from afar, there should be no problem at all.”, he said with a pointed look at Alyssa, who just huffed in annoyance.
Nathan giggled, his brown eyes lighting up with amusement. He loved watching his parents playfully bicker. It was way better than seeing them- ugh, kiss.
“We were pretending to be superheroes and Fred used his full name for his pretend name cause it sounded cool, and it is. Fredrick Anthony Watson sounds like something from that show you and mom watch with the guys in the stuffy suits.”
“When did you see us watching the show with the guys in the stuffy suits?”, asked Ethan with a slight hint of concern. Whatever he and Alyssa watched on their free nights was definitely not kid-friendly.
“I don’t remember. Maybe a few months ago.”
Their year old puppy, Ivy, woke up from her nap and bounced into the living room to jump onto her favourite person. Nathan squealed with joy as the fluffy hair of the dog tickled his nose.
Ethan and Alyssa smiled at each other. Getting another dog after Jenner was a decision that took a lot of convincing, but their kids were responsible enough and it was impossible to say no after two years of constant pestering.
“Fred told me that he was named after his great-grandfather William, and that he was this really cool guy who saved a bunch of guys from getting mugged in a dark, dark alley.” He turned to look at his parents as Ivy snuggled into his lap. “Who was I named after mom?”
The question caught her off guard, and she glanced at Ethan for backup.
When they knew that they were having a boy, they immediately knew what to name him. They hadn't, however, anticipated Nathan Daniel Brooks-Ramsey to ask such a question this soon.
Seeing his wife at a loss for words, Ethan spoke up. “C’mere Nate.” He pulled him closer and pressed a kiss atop his head. “We once had a friend named Daniel. He worked at the hospital as a nurse, and he was close to your mom and Aunt Sienna when they were interns.”
Having found her voice, Alyssa joined in. “He was an amazing friend. He was the only nurse in the hospital who helped me out when things got messy, and cheered up Aunt Sienna when no one else could. He’d join us for picnics and movie nights, and you could always count on him if you needed something at the hospital.” She took a deep breath, and Ethan nodded. “Things were going well, but then in my second year, something really bad happened.”
“Oh no.”
“There was this bad guy, who wanted his revenge on another bad guy, and he was ready to risk his own life, and the lives of everyone around him to do so.”
“That’s horrible! Who would want to do something like that?”
Ethan smiled wistfully. “A lot of people in this world actually do. You’re a good person, so you know that it’s wrong. But some people aren’t, and they don’t care about other people getting hurt because of their actions. That night at the hospital, Danny tried to tell the bad guy that it was wrong, and to think things through. But he didn’t listen, and did something that hurt both himself, Danny, Uncle Raf, another friend of ours, and your mom.”
His little eyebrows creased with worry, Nathan asked, “What happened then?”
“He… he died. Along with our other friend, Bobby. Do you remember what we once told you about an autopsy?” Nathan nodded his head. “Well Danny asked for his body to be autopsied, and thanks to him, we were able to find out what was wrong with mom and Uncle Raf.”
He fell silent for a moment, remembering the horrors of the day, and how eternally grateful he was to Danny for being the reason he didn’t lose everything. He couldn’t imagine a life without the love of his life and his children, and he wouldn’t have either if not for the sacrifices that were made.
He looked up at Alyssa, and she squeezed his hand in support. “We’ll tell you more when you’re older, but to make it short, you’re named after a hero too. If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t have you, your sisters, or mom here with me.”
Nathan wriggled out of his dad’s arms, and set Ivy down so he could hug his mom as tightly as he could.
“Well… if you can hear me Mr. Daniel, I just wanna thank you. Thanks for saving my mom. I love her so much and I’m so thankful that I got to meet her because of what you did. I wish I could’ve met you, you sound like a really cool person, and I’m sure you were. So yeah, thanks. A lot.”
Alyssa’s eyes glimmered with unshed tears, and she held her son as she expressed her silent thanks along with Ethan.
What they had was precious.
Fifteen years had passed since they first met, and yet each day they fell in love a little more like they did when they held hands for the first time in the dim light of the NICU watching over little Ethan, or when she finally got to see the real him the first time she visited his place; the first time in years he let someone know a little of the worries residing deep in his heart.
With all the odds against them, it was a miracle that they survived, even more so that they managed to raise three perfect children who had more love to share than they could ever comprehend.
And they’d never forget all the reasons that made it possible for them to survive.
Ding!
The timer on the oven went off, and they got to their feet to get the chicken.
“Was he a good cook dad?”
“I… don’t really know, Nate. Your mom knew him better than I did.”
“Well there was this one time where he helped Aunt Sienna bake an amazing cake, so I guess he knew his way around the kitchen.”, Alyssa recollected fondly. It was for Jackie’s birthday, one of the few nights where the competition was completely forgotten about.
Nathan’s face melted into a glowing smile. “I love cake. So I guess I really would’ve loved him.”
She mirrored his radiant expression. “You definitely would’ve.”
“Why don’t you go play with Ivy while mom and I get the food ready? You can help us with the dessert later.”
“We’re having dessert?!”
Ethan grinned at his son’s excitement. “You bet we are.”
“Yay!” They watched as Nathan ran off to go play fetch with Ivy in their enormous backyard.
Ethan pulled Alyssa in for a sweet, lingering kiss as soon as he was out of sight.
“You’ve been wanting to do that for a while now hmm?”
“Something like that.”, he murmured as they broke apart.
She could see the ever-increasing strands of silver in his brown hair, and the faint wrinkles along the sides of his forehead, but his clear blue eyes were just as loving and devoted as she remembered from over a decade ago.
“We have a pretty good life, don’t we?”
Ethan kissed her again. “No, we have the perfect life.”
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A/N 2: Aaaand I’m going MIA again. Honestly though, to everyone who’s read so far, thank you so much for sticking around. Means the world💙
P.S: I finally chose Chyler Leigh as my face claim!
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themaribatpit · 3 years ago
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Jasonette July Day 15: Night
Written by: The Maribat Pit  @jasonette-july-event Prompt: Night Rated: T 
A/N: A continuation "Game On” and “Pixie” Marinette had been in Gotham for a little over a year now, having left behind her life in Paris to attend Gotham University.  It all started when she got involved with Catwoman, who saved her one night when she was in trouble.  Then she got roped into a little game between Catwoman and Batman, and that was how she met Jason and Roy, Red Hood and Arsenal respectively. While with Jason and Roy, they had their ups and downs. Initially she felt that the two were overprotective, but they were able to reconcile after a fateful encounter in the Iceberg Lounge.  Ever since that fateful encounter, what started as a harmless little crush began to grow over time.  For once, she got to know people who understood both the real her and her superheroine persona.  They knew her as a quick thinker in battle, and a civilian with a tendency to catastrophize things.  While she was sitting in the car with Jason and Roy, driving back from Star City.  The only sounds that could be heard were the scratching of pencil on paper, and the hum of the engine as they drove.  She tried to throw herself into her upcoming design assignments that weren’t due for another few weeks, doing anything to avoid thinking about Jason sleeping peacefully in the front seat of the car.  Tikki was nestled in her bag nibbling on a cookie and only Roy seemed to notice how quiet the drive back to Gotham was.  She had developed a close friendship with the three of them, one which wasn’t complicated by secret and civilian identities.  They had each other’s backs in combat, and they worked well as a team together.  Marinette cursed herself, for the first time in a long time, she had relationships that weren’t complicated by secrets and secret identities.   Now she was going to ruin everything just because she could not keep her heart and her feelings under control, it was pathetic.  It was easier to think that Jason was a stubborn, sarcastic brute who couldn’t possibly understand her.  He could still be stubborn and sarcastic at times, but then he had to go and have another side to him.  A side of him that cared deeply for those close to him, a group of people that now included Marinette.  It wasn’t fair.  Marinette shook her head and turned her attention back to her design work,  these patterns weren’t going to sketch themselves. It was also one of the few times she got to work with more delicate fabrics. Jason was pretending to be asleep on the drive from Star City back to Gotham, not unlike the one that happened a few months ago. It seemed like yesterday they first heard about a new superheroine who managed to take on two of his younger brothers.  Marinette was certainly a girl with many contradictions, even when they first met her on that rooftop that fateful night.  She could be very creative with her magic yo-yo, and in a fight she was usually a level-headed and quick thinker.  That much was clear to anyone who saw her in action, which was probably for the best, given that Jason had a very short fuse and a tendency to brute force his way through situations.  By the same token, the same person was prone to flying off the handle in much more mundane situations.   One time she woke up early for a test that wasn’t for another two days, and flew into a panicked stream of consciousness that made it sound like she was going to be shipped back to her home city in a matchbox if she was late.  Jason didn’t dare turn around to look at her in the backseat, but he could just about imagine what she looked like.  The scratching of pencil on paper told him that she was probably designing something that had more in common with a ball gown than body armour.  Her skills as a seamstress came in handy when their body armour needed upgrades or adjustments, not everyone could be gifted with the power of a magic body suit.  Even Hal Jordan was a test pilot long before he became a Green Lantern, Marinette was just a teenager when she got given magic jewelry. Secret identities and personas aside, at her core Marinette was still the same person.  She was kind, forgiving, but most of all she trusted him, something very few people did.  At first he wrote it off as all of them having each other’s backs in a fight. While that was true it wasn’t the whole  story, he knew because he could say the same thing about Roy.  He considered maybe it was because she managed to calm his pit madness, but that was because she had the very creatures who created them by her side.  Jason still called her “Pixie '' from time to time, really out of affection more than anything.  He only used her name when he was being absolutely dead serious.  It was a lot more than that and he knew it, he knew that she was worming her way past all the walls he had put up, seemingly without even trying.  He convinced himself that it was dangerous for all involved, that it would just leave him vulnerable in the end.  She was getting closer and closer to his heart, at which point he would be completely and utterly vulnerable.  He wanted to hold her close to him, but was afraid that she would hold his heart in her tiny delicate hands and squeeze.  
Roy was exhausted, not just from the mission, but from being caught right in the middle of two of his friends pining after each other. In the car ride back to Gotham, he could easily tell that Marinette was busying herself with design work while Jason was pretending to be asleep.  It would be cute if it wasn’t a sign that these two were actively avoiding talking to each other. Possibly because they were worried they might slip up and reveal their very obvious feelings for the other person.  He overheard Marinette confiding in the Kwamis late one night, when she thought both of them were out.   Jason by contrast was a little less expressive, but Roy could still tell that he was also pining after her, in his own little way.   He had tried to gently coax it out of them, and even though they refused to admit it Roy could tell.   Marinette was an open book whenever he even suggested the idea that she might be slightly attracted to Jason. At the slightest suggestion that there was something between her and Jason, her face would go tomato red and she would deny it.  Jason was a much tougher nut to crack, but Roy already knew that from the get-go. If Marinette wore her heart on her sleeve, then Jason kept his heart guarded with steel and lead.  He tried to ask him about it on a mission, when Marinette was out of earshot.   Instead he took a leaf out of Dick’s book and asked if it was really the time and place for a “man chat”.  The three of them could be compared to The Three Musketeers, but Jason and Marinette were more like Beatrice and Benedict from Much Ado About Nothing.  He was cursing Jason’s detective training, because it meant he would see right past a forged love note, while making things worse for Marinette.  If Roy was still drinking, he would have probably told them that they should just screw and get it over with.  He was starting to understand why Lian would smush her doll’s faces together and get them to ‘kiss’.  That gave him an idea...
Marinette and Jason were calmly watching TV together one night.  It was Valentine's Day, but neither of them really had any plans with anyone.  Staying in and waiting for chocolate prices to crater seemed like a much better idea.  Tikki was perched on Marinette’s shoulder, while Plagg was about to inhale a very large piece of camembert. The two of them were a comfortable distance apart, neither of them were willing to make the first move.  Suddenly, Roy busts in through the front door. Dressed up as Arsenal with a few extra accessories, a tutu and a pair of fairy wings he likely borrowed from Lian. He came in wide grin, wielding his bow with an odd heart shaped arrow. 
 “Happy Valentine's Day bitches!” he yelled out, taking aim at Marinette and Jason. The grappling arrow wrapping around the two, tightly binding them together on the sofa. Just as Marinette and Jason realise what just happened, Roy runs back out the door, slamming it on his way out.
An awkward silence hung in the air as Jason and Marinette were tied together, their faces mere inches apart. Marinette blushing a storm, while Jason tried to keep his composure and looked away from her.  That said, he could feel her deep blue eyes watching him, and he was fairly certain she could hear the sound of his heart beating in his chest.  Their arms were clamped firmly to their sides, and both of them thought that Roy had done this as a stupid prank.  “Did Roy tell you he was going to…” Marinette began. “...put on a tutu and fairy wings and tie us up on the couch?” Jason finished, he swallowed, she already looked embarrassed by the whole situation.  “No, did he tell you?” he asked. Marinette shook her head, “No, but he seems to have got it into his head that you’re interested in me.” she said as she tried to wriggle free, “as if that would ever happen.” “I mean...” the conversations he wrote off as late night man-chats were starting to make sense to him.  “...is that really so hard to believe?” he asked quietly.  There was no keeping her at arm’s length at that moment, physically or otherwise.  He noticed that she had stopped trying to wriggle free of the cord wrapped tightly around him. “A little,” she said, “It just seemed too good to be true,” she muttered.  “You’re one of the few people who knows about both Marinette and Ladybug, you know that they’re the same person.”  she explained, “the idea that you would be interested in me on top of all that just felt like it was too good to be true, like something will do horribly wrong sooner or later. Like there was no way the universe was going to let me be that happy.” Jason was surprised to hear that, but also he understood what she meant.  It was funny how on paper, they were two completely different people, and in some way they were.  It was moments like these that reminded them there were still similarities that kept them together.  For the first time since Roy had tied them up, he looked at her. “Marinette, take it from someone who’s a literal dead man walking. Trust me, that is not the most impossible thing out there, not even close.” he tried to say, Marinette looked up at him, trying to make sense of the meaning in his words.  “If anyone’s going to get slapped around by the universe, and feel as if they don’t deserve to have someone who’s seen different sides of them and still cares about them, it’s probably me,” he explained. 
Both of them finally knew what Roy was trying to do,  after all he had been painfully obvious. Jason himself tries to get a sharp batarang from his pocket, he assures Marinette, “Don’t worry Pixie, I’ll get us out of here and we can forget this ever happened.” 
 Marinette remains silent as Jason struggles against the wire tying them together, Tikki floats to her side and whispers into her ear. “Marinette, it's now or never.” Marinette looks back to see all the Plagg cheering her with a grunt. If lifting the piece of camembert with little enthusiasm counts as cheering. 
 Marinette takes a deep breath, and gathers her courage. “Jason?” she asks, and Jason pauses to look back at her.  Her face had a rosy pink glow as she leaned forward to give Jason a kiss. Jason pauses in shock at first before, and slowly melts to return the kiss. As the two kiss, Tikki helps untie the two. Just as Tikki finishes untying, Marinette and Jason hold each other in a tight embrace, eagerly savouring their newfound relationship. 
 Roy peeked his head through the window watching Marinette and Jason finally confess to each other. “About time you two got together” he cheered from the fire escape, giving the two a thumbs up and a big grin. This breaks Marinette and Jason from their affectionate moment together, embarrassing Marinette and annoying Jason. 
 Jason stomps over to the fire escape, Roy nervously greets Jason “Hey buddy, how’s it going?”
 Jason grabs Roy by the ankle, dangling him off the edge of the fire escape. “Pixie, why don't you give him a taste of his own medicine?” Marinete nods and walks over with the grappling arrow Roy shot at the two. 
 Roy pleaded, “Come guys, you two had it bad for each other it was obvious.” Marinette begins to tie Roy to the fire escape with the grappling wire. Roy attempts to struggle but Jason holds him down. 
 As Marinette progresses further in tying Roy up, his pleas become more and more desperate. 
 “I did you two a favour.” Roy begs, “Come on, is this how you two repay me? Help! Somebody! Batman! BATMAAAN!” Roy wailed. 
 Marinette and Jason ignore Roy’s begging. Once they were finished they both left, hand in hand, leaving Roy tied upside down to do some self-reflection. 
 BONUS 
Cupid: What's this I hear about you playing Cupid? 
Roy: Sorry, it was for two people who were actually in love. 
Cupid: Why you little- 
Roy: Cupid, it's been YEARS, you're a very attractive woman. It can't be that hard to find someone who loves you back, someone who doesn’t have a goatee.
79 notes · View notes
renegadewangs · 3 years ago
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Van Zieks - the Examination, part 11
Warnings: SPOILERS for The Great Ace Attorney: Chronicles. Additional warning for racist sentiments uttered by fictional characters (and screencaps to show these sentiments).
Disclaimer: (see Part 1 for the more detailed disclaimer.) - These posts are not meant to be taken as fact. Everything I’m outlining stems from my own views and experiences. If you believe that I’ve missed or misinterpreted something, please let me know so I can edit the post accordingly. -The purpose of these posts is an analysis, nothing more. Please do not come into these posts expecting me to either defend Barok van Zieks from haters, nor expecting me to encourage the hatred. - I’m using the Western release of The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles for these posts, but may refer to the original Japanese dialogue of Dai Gyakuten Saiban if needed to compare what’s said. This also means I’m using the localized names and localized romanization of the names to stay consistent. -It doesn’t matter one bit to me whether you like Barok van Zieks or dislike him. However, I will ask that everyone who comments refrains from attacking real, actual people.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10
Bring on the game's credits! BRING IT! The Resolve of Ryunosuke Naruhodo part 2 is here!
Episode 2-5: The Resolve of Ryunosuke Naruhodo, part 2
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This is the first time in a while that I actually want to try other options to see what happens. The 'accusation' leads to some witty banter with a frustrated Stronghart, but 'report' is one that gets a reaction from Van Zieks himself. Ryu theorizes that 'since Klint was a well-bred and fastidious man, and knowing the end was near, he might have wanted to tie up some loose ends in all of his outstanding business'. Van Zieks immediately replies that his brother had no outstanding business.
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DID I JUST GET PENALIZED BY THE DEFENDANT??? Just for implying his brother might've had some loose ends to tie up? Van Zieks really hates it when people show his brother even the slightest bit of disrespect, huh? Well, it's about to get a whole lot worse. Let's go for the confession option! Van Zieks definitely doesn't take kindly to this one.
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“What are you saying? Do you even realise?! A confession...about the true identity of the Professor... That, that would mean...”
He fumbled his speech, there. We've never heard him do that before. And he's gone back to that bobbing, unsteady animation halfway into the above dialogue. Ryu insists it's the only explanation that fits. The man who murdered those members of the aristocracy wasn't Genshin Asogi at all, it was the one believed to be the fifth victim, Klint van Zieks himself.
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Welp. We broke him. Stronghart remarks that Pandora's box has opened at last, making it clear he already knew what we just revealed. The gallery is outraged.
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We've gone from well-bred to thoroughbred, have we? Susato feels very bad for Van Zieks, but Ryu asks himself whether such a brilliant prosecutor never suspected “what his older brother really was”. To clear up doubt further, he asks whether Klint Van Zieks owned a dog. Barok doesn't intend to dodge the facts of the situation, it seems.
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Not what the concept art says, but it's possible Klint owned a different, smaller dog before Balmung. Van Zieks talks about how loyal the dog was and how it wore a jewel-studded collar which was stolen from the house “some years ago now”. This implies it was less than ten years ago, and must've been kept in the house as a keepsake even after Balmung passed away. Ryu and Susato bring up that they've seen such a collar; it was Selden's loot in case 2-2. They note the fancy B emblem on it, and this is the first time we find out that Klint van Zieks was a married man. His widow's maiden name was Baskerville. It's a little odd to me that for someone who thought so highly of his brother, Van Zieks never mentioned his sister in law before now. Conveniently, it never came up for the sake of a twist, I suppose. Either way, the emblem confirms the collar they saw was Balmung's. Ryu notes there was a considerable amount of blood on the collar (nobody washed this thing?) and while it could've come from typical hunting trips, it could just as well have been human blood. With that, the gallery begins to lean towards the truth that Klint van Zieks really was the Professor himself. Stronghart seems to have realized there's no way out of this now and announces that 'they may have the truth'.
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Here comes that 'true nature' thing again, just worded a bit differently. Van Zieks doesn't intend to shirk away from it, though. He's open to the insinuation that his brother was, in truth, something truly horrible. Stronghart explains that Klint attempted to fight the growing darkness in London, only to end up being consumed by it. He also admits that after the fourth victim fell, Genshin showed up at his office, putting forth the accusation that Klint was the Professor. He didn't have any evidence and needed a warrant to get some, but Stronghart refused to anger the aristocracy based on the accusation of a visiting student, so he sent Genshin away. As a result, the man headed over to the Van Zieks mansion and Klint perished. Stronghart continues to admit that he was responsible for pinning the Professor's crimes on Genshin, right down to ordering Gregson to fabricate evidence. Sure enough, the late inspector's earlier claims ring true: it seems he did genuinely believe Genshin to be the killer, but was reluctant to falsify anything until Stronghart strong-armed him into it. The jailbreak agreement was also part of Stronghart's plan; he manipulated Genshin into agreeing by proverbially dangling his 14 year old son in front of him. Van Zieks brings up one more point: that Stronghart was the mastermind behind the Reaper organization. Not only does he admit to it, he calls it a “brilliant idea” and even takes credit for how his “minions” worked tirelessly to ensure Van Zieks was never accused of being the Reaper himself. What a smarmy bumhole. He insists it was all for the preservation of law and order across the empire, and the gallery is actually suckered into falling for this ploy. It seems as if he's going to get away with his masterminding without decent consequences. Kazuma now has one more question for Van Zieks, and it's the exact one Ryu asked himself earlier; did he never have any doubts about his brother?
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“My brother's sense of justice was extremely strong. Perhaps...too strong, I observed. […] During the time of the Professor killings, my brother did not appear to be himself. But it was only once. Not more. Klint wasn't the culprit. That was my conclusion at the time. And I still believe that now. […] The third victim...was the Lord Chief Justice at the time. It was he who had recognized my brother's potential and trained him as a prosecutor. No matter what the circumstances, it's unthinkable that my brother could have killed his friend and mentor!”
So here, we learn that Klint wasn't an infallible paragon of virtue in his brother's eyes. Simply by saying that his sense of justice was “perhaps too strong”, a flaw is being brought to light. Younger Barok saw that Klint's need to ensure justice was overpowering him, and he also saw that during the time of the killings, something was off about his behavior. Enough to have the younger Van Zieks consider, for a brief time, that perhaps the Professor was him. However, the death of the third victim was like a lifeline to him, a flotation device keep him from going under- or perhaps more like a straw to grasp. It offered a sort of justification to him; a firm belief that Klint would never kill his own mentor and therefore he couldn't possibly be the Professor, and Barok was wrong to ever doubt him. However, it was just a very meager excuse to put his suspicions at ease and blind him to the truth. There are, after all, plenty of reasons why Klint would kill that Lord Chief Justice if indeed he were the Professor.
So Stronghart now tries to wrap everything up with a neat little bow, saying that's all the truth they'll be able to get from this trial and he'll present himself at the Ministry of Justice for whatever sanctions are deemed necessary. Since he's the Lord Chief Justice, I can't imagine the Ministry of Justice will give him more than a slap on the wrist. However, he says just a bit too much in his closing statement and Ryu jumps on that immediately. A third page of Genshin's will was hidden from everyone! Turns out, it was a personal message to Kazuma that they never bothered to send to Japan. Governor Caidin conveniently brought it with him and the contents are read aloud after some pressuring. With this last secret message left behind by Genshin, Ryu manages to find Klint's last will and testament hidden inside the Asogi clan's sword. GASP.
Oblivious to the shenanigans playing out in the Court Record section of the game, Stronghart once again tries to end the trial and even goes so far as to say Klint was basically insane when he took his mentor's life (to which Van Zieks objects fiercely). Ryu interjects, saying he has one more piece of evidence to present. When Stronghart calls the very notion absurd, Van Zieks once again raises an objection, pointing out that “this gentleman has an uncanny habit of producing evidence at the final hour that had escaped everyone else's attention.” Which, y'know, is true. That's how Ace Attorney works. I do want to draw attention to the fact that he said “this gentleman” as opposed to “this Nipponese” or even something like “this barrister”. He considers Ryu a gentleman now! So with that, Ryu has the opportunity to shove Klint's will in everyone's face and things escalate very quickly.
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Ooh, his speech faltered again. He is shook! And it gets even better when he gets a closer look at the document.
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Stronghart panics and demands Ryu hands the document over to him at once. When that fails, he even tries to forcibly adjourn the trial and get everyone to clear the courtroom. If that isn't suspicious, we don't know what is. It sure is satisfying to watch him squirm. Naturally, he can't actually put an end to the trial now- not with so many people watching, so the document is read aloud. It's revealed that Genshin challenged Klint to a duel, so that he might “depart this world with honor”. Klint goes on to write that he finds himself undeserving of this honor and that “the Japanese are a truly merciful people”. So here, already, we get the final nail in the coffin for Van Zieks's entire motivation for racial prejudice and for hating Genshin in particular. Klint never thought ill of Genshin, not even in his final moments. If anything, he was grateful for being put out of his misery and being allowed to 'depart the world with honor'. Genshin's actions were not betrayal; not ever. They were merciful. (COOL MOTIVE, STILL MURDER.) What we also learn is that while Klint did indeed take the life of the first victim on his own accord, he was then immediately identified as the culprit and blackmailed into the next three killings by someone else. You guessed it, it was Stronghart! Despite his earlier panic, he now has a myriad of justification ready, talking about how sacrifices have to be made for the sake of justice and whatnot. He also explains that he was the one who pressured Jigoku into shooting Genshin in the graveyard when Drebber showed up there. He acts like Jigoku is the only one to blame, but considering Stronghart was basically screaming in Jigoku's ear, I wouldn't be surprised if this poor man pulled the trigger by accident simply because he was startled by the shouting. Stronghart was the one who decided that Genshin needed to die and forced Jigoku to act, so Stronghart is the one ultimately responsible. Naturally, Ryu and Kazuma both attempt to argue Stronghart's justifications into the ground. At one point, Stronghart plays the victim card and asks them to acknowledge his 'struggle', but Kazuma insists that this jerk has done nothing and:
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WELL. Okay. Looks like we've finally convinced Kazuma that Van Zieks is a victim in this whole ordeal, as well as someone who 'acts justly'. That's a wonderful way forward. With all this out in the open, though, Stronghart offers a literal round of applause. It's true; he's “done nothing” and “merely been surrounded by fools who've acted very rashly indeed”, which means he can't be charged with any crimes. We can't even prove he threatened anyone into doing his bidding, as he says it might as well have been “bargaining”. Thing is, bargaining with someone to end a third party's life is known as “contract killing” and is, in fact, illegal. I can't find any sources to verify whether it was already illegal in 1900 England, but I can only assume so, or people would've gotten away with murders very easily. I guess the bottom line here is that we can't prove Stronghart really did extort or pay anyone to take a life, since there's no material evidence for that sort of thing, nor anyone who can testify on it. Stronghart claims that the minutes of the trial will be heavily redacted to remove matters not related to Gregson's death, in the interest of preserving law and order, as well as to protect the queen. The gallery has now turned against us as well, chanting Stronghart's name.
Here we have a singular opportunity to deviate into the closest thing to a bad ending this game series has. Anyone who remembers the iconic 'the miracle never happen' ending in AA2, or even the bad endings in AA5 where either Trucy or Athena is implied to be killed by Aura, will be sorely disappointed by this one. First, to compare... In the standard ending, no matter how far along you've gotten in the trial- including proving that Stronghart was the Reaper- Van Zieks will still be found guilty. Stronghart will utter the words that he “would like to think however misguided, [Van Zieks] acted out of a sense of justice nonetheless”, and then pronounces the poor man guilty of crimes we've already proven were never committed by him. Now, in this slightly different ending, if you run out of all your penalty points because you fail to present Harely, the dialogue is tweaked. Stronghart declares that for the sake of justice, “the only correct course of action has been unanimously acknowledged by the clear majority here present. All mention of that which has been discussed in this courtroom today will be struck from the records. Barok van Zieks – Or should I say, Reaper of the Bailey... The heinous crimes committed by your brother, Klint van Zieks, will be lost in obscurity, this time forever. May you also find peace now as you join your sibling in the eternal darkness.”
And then, just as in the standard ending, Van Zieks is pronounced guilty and the doors slam shut. So effectively, the only real difference here is that Stronghart really rubs it in our faces that Van Zieks is taking the fall as the Reaper in the eyes of the public. He knows Van Zieks isn't the Reaper- everyone present in the courtroom knows it. However, since the entirely gallery is siding with the real mastermind, the minutes of the trial will be confiscated and destroyed so that the truth will be lost forever. Neither Kazuma nor Ryu reacts to this turn of events on-screen, which is a shame. Van Zieks doesn't fight the adjudication either, he simply accepts the verdict in silence- Hang on, where have we heard that before? Genshin? And didn't Van Zieks say that so long as his death served a purpose, he wouldn't mind dying over being called the Reaper? Stronghart certainly seems to feel that Van Zieks ought to be thrown under the omnibus and sent to the gallows for the sake of minimizing crime in London.
But we're not going to let the true antagonist of this game get away with his bullshit! Time to pull Harely's ears! Cue another (S)Holmeus Ex-Machina where it turns out the entire secret trial has been livestreamed to the Queen of England through holograms. By royal decree, Stronghart is stripped of his title and will be prosecuted for his crimes at a later time. FINAL BOSS, DEFEATED.
With Stronghart out of the way, Van Zieks has some closing sentiments to offer.
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“Is that my brother left this world without a word to me.”
I can see why that might bug him. Van Zieks always looked up to his brother and shielded him from disrespect even a decade after his death, but Klint in turn didn't seem to want to leave any parting sentiments for him, not even a simple farewell. That's not the case, though! Susato points out there's actually more to Klint's will than was read aloud, so let's hear it now.
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“Barok, you have always looked up to me, and now, you follow in my footsteps to become a prosecutor. It is my fervent wish that my unspeakable deeds should not hinder your advancement. I ask not for understanding, for none could understand my depravity. I ask only for forgiveness. Asogi is a fine detective, and a hunter worthy of respect. He has agreed to honour my final two wishes. The first is that this document survives. The second... I cannot commit to paper. I have confessed my sins to my wife. May she find resolution in my death. With my eternal gratitude to my Japanese friend, I rest my quill.”
Imagine how different things would've ended if the will had found its way to Van Zieks shortly after Klint's death. It would've prevented so much grief and so much prejudice, because if Van Zieks had learned that Klint still regarded Genshin with so much respect and gratitude even in this situation, he would never have blamed him for Klint's death nor considered it too great a betrayal. Everything that happened was in line with Klint's wishes. As it stands now, the words in Klint's will basically serve to scold Van Zieks for his attitude and hatred these past ten years.
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Yep, there we go. The final straw. He's been truly, utterly embarrassed and made to confront his mistakes. When Stronghart explains how his ambition to become Attorney General is what prompted him to silence people like Watson and Gregson. Van Zieks asks him whether he ever bothered to count the number of brilliant people he had killed. Kind of a questionable remark, since Stronghart mostly had criminals killed. We don't even know for sure whether Watson was a good person or not; he comes across as a cowardly skeeve. I guess Van Zieks is mostly talking about Genshin, but even that is... Uh...
I received an Ask a while back, bringing up the matter that Genshin appears to be exonerated of any wrongdoing when the truth of Klint's death is revealed. That despite duels being outlawed and it being literal murder, Kazuma seems to take this truth as his father's name being cleared. Indeed, going over everything we've learned so far, it feels as if the narrative has set up both Klint and Genshin, and even characters like Jigoku and Gregson, as victims of Stronghart's manipulation. The thing is, though... Both Genshin and Klint took at least one life of their own free will, Jigoku pulled a trigger twice for the sake of his own career (and recruited someone into an assassin plot), Gregson conspired with a notorious assassin to commit over a dozen murders just because his boss told him it was the right thing to do... Feeling bad about murder or resorting to it because 'the other person is even worse and needs to be stopped' doesn't change that it's murder. It doesn't seem as if Kazuma or anyone else outright says their loved ones are absolved of any responsibility/their names are cleared, but it does really come across as if the narrative wants you to forgive them. So uh... Yes. This is something the game should have properly addressed, instead of just going 'oh, these poor people, all used as puppets by the final boss'.
Anyway, (S)Holmes takes the time to remind Van Zieks that he's the defendant in this case, not the prosecutor. Our old friend Santa Judge returns for the adjudication! Turns out, he was in the gallery all along. (Was he chanting Stronghart's name too?) He talks about how the darkness of the past ten years has lifted, in part thanks to a bright young star from the East. Awww, we've completely won over the judge! Van Zieks now also has something to add.
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“I had the faintest of intimations. That if British justice, so warped and twisted over its long history, was finally to know change... This might just be the man to do it. But at the time, I wouldn't allow myself to acknowledge the possibility. I couldn't overcome my hatred of the Japanese, after the circumstances of my brother's death. Mr. Naruhodo...”
He takes a flourishing bow here, an acknowledgment that Ryu is worthy of his respect and perhaps even that Ryu is superior to him, then stands up straight again for the final whammy.
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Ryu is shocked and Susato is brought to tears. We did it, y'all. We've secured the full, heartfelt apology. I'm not sure there's really anything to add to this, nor anything we could want from it at this point in time. Ryu doesn't say he forgives Van Zieks for his discourtesies, but considering how hard he worked to get this guy cleared of murder, that would feel kind of out of place. The forgiveness happened long before Van Zieks apologized, or so is the implication. (Is that the correct narrative path? Not at all, but I'll get back to that in the conclusion.) So after some more closing words from Ryu, Van Zieks gets his not-guilty verdict and court is adjourned.
In the defendant's lobby, Ryu feels a bit conflicted about how this whole thing went down. Susato tries to cheer him up by saying that everything will seem much better once he sees Van Zieks's smiling face. Indeed, in most other Ace Attorney games, this would be the point where at last, an emotionally distant defendant/witness drops their walls and allows themselves to smile (or cry). Just think of Gina, Lana Skye or even Athena Cykes when she cries tears of joy during AA5's ending. Hilariously enough, Van Zieks is not one of those characters.
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This is a really fun subversion of expectations and Ace Attorney tropes. And I still believe his face got frozen like that. Even so, he's got something heartfelt to say.
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“For you to have risen to the level of excellence you demonstrated today... Well, it's quite remarkable.”
Sounds like a hatchet job of a compliment at first glance, but the sentiment is there. It is extremely remarkable for a foreign exchange student who's only been in the country for about 9 months- and who only spent like 2 of those as an active lawyer- to rise to such a level that he not only uncovers the truth of the current case, but of a cold case from 10 years prior, which was part of a huge cover-up. Ryu points out that he exposed a most 'unpalatable truth' in court and that he feels as if he robbed Van Zieks of something precious. Van Zieks doesn't seem to agree. He reminisces on Stronghart's words.
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“But that... That was just the feeble excuse of a coward. Only those with a steadfast eye for the truth have what it takes to fight the dark forces of crime. You made fine work of establishing that fact in court today.”
So once again, he's complimenting Ryu's courtroom performance. Not only that, but he's acknowledging (in different words) the earlier sentiment that the truth needs to come out, no matter how painful. Perhaps, indirectly, he's calling himself a feeble coward as well. Ryu and Susato are proud of Van Zieks's growth, with Susato saying that surely Kazuma would be smiling if he were here. Naturally, when he shows up at that very second, he isn't smiling at all. Like mentor, like disciple! Kazuma takes a polite bow before Van Zieks and congratulates him on his acquittal. Naturally, after watching Kazuma prosecute so ferociously for two whole episodes, that doesn't feel sincere. Van Zieks asks him whether he doesn't instead want to curse him. Kazuma apologizes for his earlier behavior, which does feel 100% sincere.
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“Your father, Genshin... If I had been stronger, then perhaps... I made an unforgivable error of judgment. … I can offer no excuse.”
One more apology to add to the pile! And here we once again reach that question of whether the narrative is acting like Genshin should be absolved of all blame. In a technical sense, Van Zieks wasn't wrong to prosecute Genshin, since he did seriously murder Klint. That alone is already warranting of the death penalty, so the added crimes of the Professor on top of that don't change too much. However, I don't think Van Zieks's lines truly relate to the Professor trial itself. The error of judgment, in my eyes, can also be seen as the blind acceptance that Genshin betrayed him (as well as Klint) when there was actually far more at play. This notion that Genshin was a horrid traitor who abused their trust and hospitality was then allowed to grow into an irrational hatred which festered for a decade. Regardless of whether Genshin killed Klint, the insistence that the man's true nature was that of a monster was wrong, and I think that's what he's apologizing for. To be clear, he's not apologizing for racist sentiments uttered towards Kazuma or anyone else from Japan with these lines. This purely relates to his treatment of Genshin. However, he already apologized for his many discourtesies back in the courtroom and I think the racist outbursts were part of those discourtesies.
Kazuma says he can offer no forgiveness, which is totally fair. Kazuma isn't obligated to forgive this man. He does, however, admit that he has respect for Van Zieks, since he “fought for justice and the truth”.
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Awww! Remember how in my very first 'strong thought about Barok' post, I pointed out that Barok almost appears to have been designed to be Kazuma's rival prosecutor instead of Ryu's? Yeah. Here we see it very clearly. The reconciliation conversation between these two feels like a much better resolution than the conversation between Van Zieks and Ryu.
So now Kazuma brings up that Genshin promised to do two things for Klint, but the second wasn't mentioned in the will. Mikotoba shows up to share a very heartbreaking tale about Klint's unnamed widow, the lady Zieks-Baskerville, who was hiding out in Dartmoor and passed away from childbirth very shortly after Genshin was executed. The newborn baby girl survived, though! Van Zieks blurts out that that makes no sense. “Why on Earth wouldn't Klint have entrusted the child to my care in that case?!” And that alone is already kind of tragic, but what really packs a wallop is this:
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This means Klint and his wife deliberately kept the pregnancy from him. It's never explained why. Genshin showed up at the manor in the spur of the moment and Klint died that very same night, when his wife must've already been around 8 or 9 months pregnant. (she gives birth about a week or two later, after all.) Klint says that he 'confessed his sins to his wife', but that also must've been very recent, if not that very same night, since Stronghart was threatening to tell Klint's wife and brother of his misdeeds. Stronghart's hold on Klint would've weakened if he'd told her the truth months ago, which in turn implies the both of them decided not to tell Barok while she herself was still oblivious to the Professor truth. Honestly, it all feels like a vague plotconvenience.
What is explained is why the newborn baby wasn't entrusted to Van Zieks. It isn't because Klint had the amazing foresight to know his younger brother would become a salty, loner alcoholic; it's because he and his wife feared the truth of the Professor might come out. Heck, if Genshin had never been arrested for Klint's death, perhaps it would've come out for certain. “The girl would be forever branded as the daughter of the infamous mass murderer.” So the baby girl was distanced from the Van Zieks family as much as possible, with all of London unaware of her existence. This girl is, of course, Iris.
Right on cue, the Harely plushie activates to receive a call from (S)Holmes and Iris. She invites everyone over to 221B for a feast and makes sure to invite “Mr. Reaper” too. He very awkwardly declines the offer.
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Humanization? Humanization! He does, however, give Iris his word that he'll present himself at 221B in the near future to express his gratitude. I think a big part of why he declined the offer was because he wouldn't feel at home during the big celebration when a whole group of people is there. He'd much rather visit Iris during a more quiet, private moment and that's sweet too. Plus, I don't think he's in the mood for a celebration, considering all the horrible truths he's learned in a single day.
So now Kazuma prepares to leave and asks Van Zieks to accompany him. The wording of “would you care to-” makes it very clear this isn't a demand, it's a very soft request that Van Zieks is free to decline. Not that he hesitates for even a second. Here's some more parting words.
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“I believe... You saved my life.”
He takes a deep, flourishing bow and honestly I've lost track of how many times he's praised/thanked Ryu by now. More than Edgeworth thanked Phoenix, most likely. The prosecutor duo prepares to walk away, but Ryu calls after Van Zieks, asking him to wait. Which he does. Ryu asks him what he intends to do now.
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... “Prosecutor van Zieks chooses death”??? In a way, he's thinking of pulling a similar move. He intends to publicize the full truth of the Professor, and I can only imagine that includes Stronghart's involvement in what went down 10 years ago. Maybe he'll even share the truth of the Reaper who's haunted the courtroom all these years. He believes that “once that's done, the Van Zieks family will be ostracised completely from London society.” (I don't think he means living family members, but rather, the legacy of the Van Zieks name and the rights associated with it.) So because of that, he intends to leave the capital as soon as he's free of his employment. Considering how easily this man took a five year sabbatical and adding in the fact that the Lord Chief Justice just got arrested, I expect his resignation could be as easy as packing his desk and leaving his office without saying a word. Kazuma, however, calls him a fool and a coward. He basically dares Van Zieks to keep going now that he's finally freed from the pseudonym of the Reaper. Van Zieks neither agrees with the sentiment nor shoots it down, instead saying it's unexpected to hear those words from Kazuma of all people. With that out in the open, they leave for realsies.
Just as Van Zieks doesn't attend the Baker Street party, he isn't there when Ryu's at the docks to return to Japan. I like to think Kazuma did bother to tell Van Zieks that Ryu is leaving the country, because withholding that information seems like a bit of a jerk move, but... Well. Not showing up at the docks to say some final farewells is even more of a jerk move on Van Zieks's part. Though it's possible he felt he wasn't wanted there, and may eventually ask for Ryu's address so he can write a letter (which is far less imposing than invading a heartfelt farewell with a scowling face). It's a shame, though. I would've liked to hear his thoughts on Ryu's departure.
We learn that Kazuma will “stay in Lord van Zieks's tutelage for the time being” to become a full-fledged prosecutor. Which is fine, I guess. It doesn't matter whether he's a defense attorney or a prosecutor; all that matters is the pursuit of the truth. What catches my interest is that even with all that bad blood and refusal to forgive Van Zieks, Kazuma still agrees to keep studying as his disciple. This implies to me that he sincerely doesn't believe Van Zieks to be a bad person anymore, and acknowledges he can learn a lot from this man. Which is not the same thing as being on friendly terms with him, but at the very least he's giving Van Zieks the benefit of the doubt when it comes to improving their... Well, their dynamic, I suppose I should call it.
On to the credits scenes we go! This time, Van Zieks legit does get a scene of his own, but before we address this one, I want to skip ahead real quick to Albert Harebrayne's scene.
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“He sent me a very nice letter saying he'd like to show me around now that everything was settled. B-But what have I done? I was so excited, I picked this splendid hotel and now I can't afford the bill! Oh Barok! Come to my rescue again, please! I, I wish I could just vanish into thin air sometimes!”
Several things of note can be taken out of this little scene. First of all, with the Reaper nonsense behind them, Van Zieks seems to have wasted very little time with asking his best buddy to return to London for that sightseeing that was promised. Presumably, he even paid for the trip (again), since Albert still seems to be very low on money. This, coupled with the fact that Van Zieks was reading that letter with quite a bit of dedication in his jail cell, indicates to me that he's longing for the good old days, when he could smile and have friends. He's trying to return to a sense of normalcy and since Albert is still considered his closest friend, it makes sense he'd reach out to him instead of a relative stranger like Kazuma. Baby steps. Now, the fact that Albert says “come to my rescue again” sets the very clear tone that this guy believes Van Zieks has helped him before- during the trial, of course. It's another reinforcement of the notion that Albert is thankful Van Zieks chose the role of prosecutor in order to defend the teleportation theory, even if it meant that he himself would be branded a murderer. Despite his gruff exterior and blunt words, Albert thinks of Van Zieks as a sort of knight in shining armor who will come save him. … With cold hard cash, in this case, but it's the gesture that counts. Van Zieks might allow Albert to stay in his mansion instead, but it depends how high the risk of assassination is at this point in time. People are probably hating on the Van Zieks family now that the truth of the Professor is out.
On to credits scene of Van Zieks himself! We have confirmation by now that he hasn't retired as a prosecutor, since Kazuma already expressed his intent to keep studying under him. So we see Van Zieks in his office, addressing Klint's painting.
“In those days, when I was known as the Reaper, I felt your presence at my side. Once, unable to bear the burden of that grim pseudonym, I even retired from the courtroom. Despite everything, I still wear your prosecutor's badge with pride. But the darkness that beset me is no more. As you, too... Are no more.”
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The first two sentences of this bit feel very disjointed and barely related to me, so I had a quick look at some fan translations. First is the sub translation on Youtube: “I could feel you standing by my side through the days in which I was called the Reaper. Yet there were times I could not bear the burden of that name, and left the courtroom far behind me.” The “yet” is very crucial, since it makes the insinuation that feeling his brother's presence was very important to Van Zieks, but the burden became so overwhelming that he retired anyway. Taisa the Gamer's script doesn't have a “yet” in it, nor any equivalent, but the sentence structure still flows well enough not to cast doubt on how he felt about Klint's supposed presence. Contrasting that, the localization's wording with “even” almost makes it seem like feeling Klint's presence was a negative thing- that he was overwhelmed by it and that this was the burden associated with the Reaper name, as opposed to the killings. Which can't possibly be right; he already admitted to us that the idea of his brother's ghost helping him was one of the main reasons he kept on being the Reaper. So long story short, the localization's take on these first two lines is a little off.
The prosecutor's badge thing, however, is spot on. Despite everything- despite the 'true nature' of Klint now exposed, Van Zieks still wears the badge with pride. We know the badge is symbolical, of course. He still believes in Klint's sense of justice and he's still going to openly admit to being Klint's brother- to being a Van Zieks. That's sweet. He goes on to say that the darkness within him is no more. To really grasp what that means, let's go back to the end of case 2-3 for a second. There, Van Zieks says that after his brother's death, he found himself in “a very dark place indeed”. In case 2-4, he mentions that he refuses to trust others to protect himself against betrayal, but has now sunk into a proverbial mire which makes it impossible to breathe. All of that is the same darkness he's referring to now, I'm sure. I don't believe depression can lift this easily; there's no way that darkness is no more. However, I think what he means to say is that it no longer has such a strong hold on him that it manifests in paranoia and irrational hatred. He has a chance now to start fresh and that's what he intends to do. He's striding away from that darkness, towards a brighter future. In order for a person to change for the better, they themselves have to want to change, and it looks like Van Zieks is all for that. Which at last brings us to the conclusion of this essay series! The conclusion, which looks back on the original query posed in Part 1, will once again include a load of screencaps. To keep the post size lighter, I'm going to put it in a separate post. I hope you'll look forward to it!
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rosyl-stuff · 3 years ago
Text
Hunting the Beast
Paring: Ju Haknyeon (The Boyz) x reader
Genre: Beauty and Beast retelling/inspired; dark romance (does get a little suggestive at times), angsty end
Warnings: violence, old-fashioned thinking about mental health, as well as incorrect treatment of patients
Word Count: around 10k (I thought about splitting it into multiple parts but then I was like Nah; apparently it takes around 41 minutes to read this)
Synopsis: One fateful night you are not only attacked by a beast but also meet the mysterious Haknyeon. You are attracted to him, but his secret seems to stand in the way of your relationship. Will you two find your happily ever after?
A/N: I was inspired to write this, after reading Old as Time by Liz Braswell. It's a Beauty and Beast retelling. Not my favourite book, but still good. I bought this book because of the cover, lol. Would recommend it if you like fairytales. Another huge inspiration here was the game Cinderella Phenomenon (Dicesuki). I played the entire game with all the different story paths in one night, so be careful if you want to play it because it’s addicting.
It was the third day in a row that it was raining. Your father, however, did not seem to mind. He walked across the meadow near your cottage and piled up stones. You and your father lived near a village, which was far away from the rest of the world. Once upon a time you and your father were very close to the villagers but after that one particular night, you tried to avoid the village as much as possible.
You thought about how you would get your father inside. If he stays any longer outside, he would catch a cold. He was very fixated on his project. Unfortunately, his project didn’t seem to make any sense. He was just stacking stones and calls his invention that would save their lives one day.
“Papa!”, you yelled but he wasn’t even reacting to you.
Too much in his head for him to notice you. That did happen very often since that one night. You could still clearly remember it. It had been raining a lot just like now. Your father had gone to the next town to discuss some business and left you home alone. Clearly, you were old enough to stay home alone but you haven’t been prepared for what was to come that night when he came back.
Between the village and the next town was a dark forest. As a child, the elders would tell scary stories about this forest, how they were haunted and all kind of stories to keep the children from wandering away into the forest. Your father had travelled through these woods on regular basis, but on his way home that night something had gone terribly wrong.
What exactly had happened, you didn’t know and you weren’t even sure if your father knows it. The image of your father running out of the forest would haunt you forever. He was covered in blood and dirt and the fear was evident on his face. He collapsed right at your door. You pulled him inside and luckily, he only had some minor injuries.
But when he awoke the next morning, he didn’t remember anything. He didn’t even remember you at the beginning. It seemed like the horse wasn’t the only thing your father lost that night in the forest. Sometimes there are little silver linings, where his eyes begin to clear up but the only thing he then would say: "There is a beast, Y/N! In the forest. Promise me, my dear, never go into the forest.”
Overwhelmed by the situation you went to the village to consult the elders and the pastor, but this turned out to be a bad decision. Not a week later the pastor and mayor came by with a doctor who was a specialist for people with lost minds. But you couldn’t let your father go with him. You heard rumours about how badly they treated the patients there and that relatives were prohibited to visit. And after losing your mother at a very young age, you couldn’t lose your father too. So you assured the visitors that your father is no threat: You will take care of him and he will never bother any of the villagers.
But every time you wanted to go to the village and run errands your father would insist on accompanying you. The villagers didn't like that, they were afraid that his disease was contagious. Many vendors didn't let you buy their goods. You needed to find an alternative. You went hunting. In the forbidden woods, but your father didn’t need to know that. Every time your father was busy with stacking rocks, you sneaked in the forest to hunt something or collect berries, mushrooms or any herbs you needed. Before dawn and before your father got tired, you were back at the cottage. He never questioned where you got the dinner from. He just ate it while mumbling about his invention.
“Papa!”, you yelled again while stepping into the rain.
He only noticed you when you stood right next to him.
"Oh, dear! What is it?”
“Come inside, Papa. We don’t want you to get sick.”
“But my invention is not finished. We will need it very soon!”
“Tomorrow is another day. If you get sick, you will not be able to finish it on time as well.”
“Well, you’re right, my dear! Let’s go inside and have some tea!”
You sighed and the both of you, now fully drenched, went inside. After dinner, you spent your time reading a book while your father went to bed early. It was a romance novel and you wondered if your life would have been normal, would you have been married by now. The boys and men in the village didn't take a particular interest in you, and even though you knew that did not mean you were unattractive, you couldn't help but feel a little sad about it.
The next day the weather was significantly better, which was the perfect opportunity to go hunting. Unfortunately, your father got up very late which meant you had less time than usual for hunting. Nevertheless, you were confident that you could at least catch a hare, or maybe even a deer, for tonight's dinner. You snuck away and in the forest, you breathed deeply the humid forest air. Here, you could forget about your worries a little and have a little me time.
Unfortunately, the evening came sooner than you expected and it got dark in the forest. You still had nothing for dinner except for a few berries. That was not enough. You felt safe enough to walk to that one stream and then you would go back. You started to think of an excuse when your father asked where you have been. On the other hand, you doubted he would ask you that.
At the stream, you found many bushes with berries. You hurried to pick them up and made your way back to the cottage. It was getting darker and darker. Again and again, you tripped over branches or roots. The chirping of birds stopped and an eerie silence fell over the forest. Occasionally you heard the sound of branches cracking, and each time you had to convince yourself that it was just an animal in the undergrowth. It would be more afraid of you than you were of it.
Then you heard it: a howling. You never knew that wolves lived in the forest. You were not up to a confrontation with a pack of wolves, so you started to walk faster. But the howling got louder and louder. Not a minute later you saw blood-red eyes staring at you. The creature you faced was way too big for a wolf. It stood on his behind legs and breathed heavily. It had horrible claws and its teeth were bared. Escape or fight, you asked yourself as you reached for the knife you carried in your belt. Slowly, the smell of wet dog from the beast enveloped you.
Before you could react, the beast pounced on you. You couldn’t help the scream that erupted from you, as his canines sunk into your arm. You took your knife and ram into the direction of the beast. It let go and you got up as fast as you could and ran for your life. The beast was not distracted for too long and followed you. Not much later it had caught up with you and this time it bit you in the lower leg. Again, you screamed out as unbelievable pain flashed through you. You stabbed the beast with your knife but it seemed to be to no avail.
Then, you heard something thudding noises. The beast let go of you and ran away. For a few more seconds you lay there bleeding out on the forest floor. Father, you thought, he needs to eat something. The berries you had gathered were now squished. You didn't dare to move because the pain was too great and in your despair, you started to cry. You only noticed the footsteps when the boy was already bending over you and inspecting your wounds.
You looked at him in amazement. You had never seen him before. So he wasn't from the village and the town was too far away. You held your knife ready to stab him.
"Come on. You have to get up. Before it comes back.", he held out his hand to you.
You weighed your option. Unknown forest boy or beast? You decided to take the mysterious boy’s hand. He helped you to your feet and you both quickly realised that running was not an option for you.
"I'll carry you ok? I'll take you to a safe place," he asked.
Dazed by the pain of standing up, you nodded. He took your knife and before you could protest, he grabbed you and shouldered you. This triggered a new wave of pain and you remained silent. Instead, you concentrated on breathing the pain away.
He carried you effortlessly through the forest and you wondered if he could see anything at all. Unlike you, he moved much more elegantly and safely through the forest. After a while, he lowered you down. As you looked around, you found yourself in a ruin. He laid you down on a blanket and checked your wounds again.
After he had decided that you would not die any moment, he said: "I have to go now. Just stay here and try to sleep. I'll come back for you tomorrow!"
"Wait! Who are you anyway?"
"My name is Haknyeon!"
"And where are you going? You can't just leave me alone now!"
"Yes, I have to!"
"Are you going to get help?" you asked.
"Something like that!" he grumbled and disappeared into the darkness.
When he was gone, the panic set in. You were defenceless and injured in some ruin in the forest. You are going to die here. Your breath was going way too fast and only with difficulty did you manage to calm it down. Then exhaustion and tiredness came over you. You didn't really want to sleep. What if the beast returns? But sleep could no longer be stopped. You fervently hoped that your father would be all right.
You fell into a restless sleep. You dreamt of the beast and the red eyes and of the night your father came home covered in blood. Had he also been attacked by the beast? But he didn't have any bite marks. More like scratches and bruises.
Then you dreamt of Haknyeon, even though it was dark, you were sure he must have been a handsome young man. Or maybe it was the hopeless romantic in you because in the next moment he smiled at you and gave you a kiss on the cheek.
Only the background noises did not match the supposedly first beautiful dream of the night. You heard the howling and growling of animals. Was the beast nearby? But nothing could wake you from your beautiful dream when Haknyeon smiled at you like that and stroked your hair gently.
When you woke up a few hours later, the sun was up again. As long as you did not move, your pain was bearable. You looked around and tried to keep your body as still as possible. Haknyeon was nowhere to be seen. Just as you were about to try to get up and find your way home, you saw Haknyeon approaching you. He was all dirty and bloody. His clothes, however, were completely intact, unlike yours.
"Good morning!" he mumbled exhaustedly, grabbing a nearby bucket and turning to leave.
"Haknyeon!" you called, "what happened? Did you fight with the beast? Where are you going again?"
"I'm going to get water!" he said without turning around and then he was gone again.
This boy's got some nerve, you grumble to yourself, deciding he's not as great as in your dream. Nevertheless, you decided to wait a while longer to see if he comes back. After all, the chances of finding your way back with him were much better than alone. Last night you had completely lost your bearings. You could be anywhere.
In fact, Haknyeon came back a short time later with a full bucket of water. He seemed to have bathed himself because there was no trace of the dirt and blood. There was only a scratch on his forehead. He sat down next to you and gave you a drink.
"What is your name?" he asked.
"Y/N.", you answered.
"Do you live in the village?", he asked as he began to clean the wound on your arm. "
Yes, kind of. The cottage a bit further out."
He nodded as if he knew where you were talking about.
"And you? Where do you live? I've never seen you before!"
"Here!" he replied.
"Here?" you asked surprised.
He nodded and continued with your leg. The bite was much deeper than the one on your arm and also hurt a lot more when he cleaned it. You bit your lip and concentrated on not crying. After Haknyeon had finished cleaning your wounds, he tore some old sheets and wrapped them around both your injuries as bandages.
"Thank you!" you whispered.
He smiled at you and it was even more beautiful than in your dream.
"No problem," he replied and then gave you a handful of berries.
He had one himself and began to eat it contentedly. A little hesitantly you began to eat too.
"I have to go home again. My father must be worried already!”
He nodded: "Don't worry. I'll take you home in a minute!"
"How come you live here?" you asked again.
"It just happened that way. The people in the village are very averse to strangers or anything they don't know. That's why I decided to stay here. Free from responsibility and judgmental looks. I have everything I need here."
You look at him for a while and then ask further: "And the beast?"
"I've learned to deal with it," he answered quickly, "Let's go. Before we end up in the same situation as yesterday."
He helped you stand up and unfortunately walking was still not the best option. He picked you up and walked with you through the forest. Haknyeon smelled just like the forest, earthy and fresh and you quickly found that you liked the smell very much. On the way, you told him about your father and what happened to him. When you told him what the villagers wanted to do with him, he snorted contemptuously.
"It's so typical that they want to lock up a harmless old man right away."
Your arms tighten around him, as he wobbled down a hill.
“Don’t worry. I got you!”, he reassured you and held onto you a little tighter.
The forest slowly began to look familiar again and as soon as you emerged out of the forest, you could see the cottage. Your father was in the meadow, stacking his stones.
“Is that your father?”, asked Haknyeon.
“Yes…”, you answered.
Your father didn’t notice you coming, too focussed on his task.
“Should I take you inside or to your father?”, Haknyeon asked.
“To my father, please!”
He hesitated for a short second, but then he walked towards your father.
“Papa!”, you yelled and surprisingly he reacted.
He looked up to you and for a short moment, he had his clear eyes back.
“Y-you?”, he stammered.
“Papa! It’s me, Y/N!”
Haknyeon let you down into the soft grass of the meadow.
“I know, my dear. I remember!”
He looked at Haknyeon and studied him. He looked back at you.
“The Beast, my dear. Don’t go into the forest.”
“I know, Papa. I’m sorry. But Haknyeon saved me from the Beast!”
He looked confused at Haknyeon: “No, but-“
“I’m Haknyeon, Monsieur.”, Haknyeon interrupted him and hold out his hand for him.
Your father eyes clouded over again and he took Haknyeon’s hand and shook it.
"Are you interested in investing in my latest invention? Come on, young boy, I show you what it can do!” your father said and dragged him to the pile of stones.
You observed how your father talked, probably nonsense you guessed. Haknyeon patiently listened to him. You lay in the high grass of the meadow, unable to probably move due to your injuries and enjoyed the sun. Something was comforting about it after the many days of rain and the last night of terror. You fell into a dreamless sleep and when you woke up, you laid in your bed.
When you turned around, you could see how Haknyeon served your father a soup while he still listened to his ramble about his inventions. As he saw you were awake, he gave you smile and served your bowl of soup as well and came to your bed.
“Slept well? Here!”
“Yes, thank you!” you mumbled as you sat up.
Haknyeon sat next to you and was ready to feed you.
“I can feed myself!”, you grumbled and took the bowl and spoon away from him.
You instantly regretted it, as pain shot through your arm. You ignored the pain and began to eat. To your surprise, the soup tasted heavenly. Haknyeon observed you with mischievous eyes.
“It’s good, isn’t it?”, he said confidently.
You nodded and he grinned.
“Perfect. I will head home now. I will check by soon again and bring new food.”
“You can stay here. I’m sure my father wouldn’t mind.”
He shook his head and gave your sad smile:
“I appreciate the offer, but I can’t. I’ll see you soon. Get well soon!”
With that, he stood up and left without another word.
“What a strange guy!” you said to your father who hummed and you took it as he agreed to you.
That night you stayed awake because you couldn’t stop thinking about the moment when you laid there helpless on the ground of the forest. You read a lot about the damsel in distress and you absolutely hated that trope. Now you are one yourself, you scoffed and turned around in your bed. You tried to minimize the pain, but that turned out to be rather difficult. You will never let this happen to you again, you decided. Next time you will see the beast, the roles will be reversed. You will be the one attacking and the beast cowering in fear. With this thought, you fell asleep.
The next morning, your father attempted to make breakfast, it didn’t go that well so you two ate the left-over from Haknyeon’s soup. The pain was much more bearable today and your wounds seemed to start to heal. Short before dawn, Haknyeon came with some food and a balm for your wounds. He didn’t stay long and your father claimed most of his attention. Then he disappeared for three days.
When he came to visit again, you were able to move quite okay. You cooked something from the food he brought as a thank you and you never saw someone eat your food so enthusiastically. It made you smile like an idiot the whole dinner and you secretly hated yourself. Why are you so whipped for a strange boy who you know nothing about?
Soon after dark, Haknyeon wanted to go again and you accompanied him to the edge of the forest. When you arrived, you both stood there awkwardly.
“Why won’t you stay here? It is safer here!”
“For me, the forest is safe as well!” he countered.
You sighed. Why did you even try?
He chuckled: “You like me that much?”
You felt the heat creep up your neck and your cheeks and hoped he won’t notice it.
You scoffed: “No. I just don’t want the beast to kill you.”
“It won’t!” he said still grinning.
“Yes, maybe you right. Because before it can kill you, I will kill it!” you announced confidently.
For a moment you saw shock and surprise on his face, but then he laughed.
“Idiot!” you grumbled and turned around to go back to the cottage.
“Wait!” Haknyeon yelled and followed you.
Soon he reached you and grabbed your arm: "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to laugh at you. It's just…"
“You think I can’t do it. I get it. Now go.”
He sighed and ran a hand through his hair.
“The beast is very strong. It will kill you before you can even attack it. I think no one can kill it.” he said.
"Well, we will see," you said still a little angry.
You had to admit, you didn’t come up with a good plan yet. But there is still time and you will prepare accordingly.
“Please, think about it again. I don’t think it is a good idea.”
“What if we do together?” you asked suddenly excited.
He seemed to know a lot about the beast and the forest. If you both trained a bit together, you would definitely stand a chance.
"I can't.", he said with a sad smile.
You scoffed: “Why not?”
“I can’t tell you.”
You stare at him perplexed. Why did he have to be so mysterious? What couldn’t he tell you?
“I’m starting to think you want to protect that beast.”
“No, that’s not it.”
"You know what? Forget about it. Go to your oh-so-comfy ruin and cuddle with your beast.” you said and ripped your arm out of his hold.
You had enough of his mysterious shit and turned around to go to the cottage. This time he didn’t follow you and you didn’t turn around to see if he was still standing there.
The next morning you were still filled with anger. After breakfast, you went to the village to visit Gaston. He was the best hunter you knew and an old childhood friend of yours. He became popular as you were teens so he stopped hanging out with you. You were now sitting in his kitchen while his mother served you tea.
“So? You want to learn how to hunt?”
“Yes!, you said.
He didn’t seem to be opposed to the idea.
“May I ask why?”
"It is kind of a long story. But in the forest, there is some animal I want to see dead!"
He raised an eyebrow: “Okay? You want to hunt a predator, I assume.”
You nodded again: “Yes, can you teach me?”
He seemed to think about it for a while: “Yeah, sure. Why not?”
“Really? Oh, thank you!” you said excitedly and hugged him.
He seemed surprised but he reciprocated the hug nevertheless.
“Okay. When do we start?”
“Tomorrow?”
“Sounds great! Where?”
“You have that large meadow near your cottage. That should be a good place to start. I will come by after breakfast.”
“Thank you so much!” you exclaimed.
On your way home, you couldn’t help but skip like a little school girl. You hoped to make fast progress. Maybe Haknyeon will change his mind when he sees how capable you are.
The next two days were the most exhausting you ever had. Gaston didn't go easy on you and taught you many different techniques with different weapons. You were surprised how good you and Gaston got along. It was just like back in the old days. In your breaks, you would lay in the meadow staring up the sky and watching the clouds.
On day three of your training, you saw Haknyeon. He stood at the edge of the forest and watched you two with a dark and unreadable expression on his face. You sent Gaston home and went to him.
“What are you doing here?” you confronted him.
“Just checking by. What are you up to with that hunter?”
“You know Gaston?”
“I’ve seen him hunting in the forest.”
That made sense, you thought.
“So? Is he your boyfriend?” Haknyeon asked.
You couldn’t help but smile. “That’s none of your business.”
Haknyeon scoffed: “Is he trying to teach you hunting?”
You nodded.
“You know he’s not that good!” Haknyeon said.
“Is that so? He is the best hunter, I know!" you countered.
“Well, I hate to break it to you, but I’m better”
You chuckled. He might be right, you thought, but he won’t teach you.
“It doesn’t really matter!” you said.
“Why? So he is your boyfriend?” Haknyeon asked again.
You sighed. Why was he so obsessed with Gaston being your boyfriend?
“No. But I need someone to teach me how to hunt!”
“I can do that!” Haknyeon exclaimed.
You raised an eyebrow. What made him change his mind?
You decided not to question it, so you said: “Okay. Then teach me!”
He grabbed your hand and pulled you into the forest.
“First of all, just because you can do it meadow doesn’t mean it will work in the forest as well.”
So your training with Haknyeon began. It was very different from Gaston's. Instead of theory and technique, Haknyeon concentrated on using the forest to your advantage. He showed you how you could outsmart the beast and its instinct. He knew a lot about the beast, just like you had guessed.
But Haknyeon only came by every third day, so you kept training with Gaston. One day Haknyeon came at a day, he usually didn't. He saw you and Gaston laying in the meadow and laughing. You only saw him as he disappeared into the forest again. You really hoped he wasn't hurt by you still training with Gaston. This night you could barely sleep.
But the next day, when Haknyeon came to visit you, he wasn’t mad at all. He even brought you a rose. It looked ethereal.
"I didn't know roses grow in the forest!”, you said as you put it in a vase.
Haknyeon laughed nervously: “Yes, I found this one rather by accident too. I hope you like it.”
“It's beautiful! Thank you.”
“It reminded me of you," he said and you couldn't help but blush.
You stared intently at the rose. Carefully, Haknyeon stroked your cheek.
"You are both so beautiful. I'm afraid you'll fall apart every time I touch you."
The blood rushed in your ears and when you looked at Haknyeon you thought you were sinking into his beautiful brown eyes. He took a step closer to you and you could smell his scent: earthy and fresh. His hands cupped your face as he looked at you intensely. As if he wanted to imprint the sight of you forever.
He pulled you even closer and your chest touched his. Your body tingled with excitement. Your gaze briefly wandered from his eyes to his lips. When you looked into his eyes again, he had come much closer to you. You felt his breath on your lips and you closed your eyes. But your lips never touched because Haknyeon suddenly pushed you away.
"Sorry!" he mumbled sheepishly.
You just nodded, unable to process this situation.
"We should start training!" he said and walked towards the forest.
However, you couldn't concentrate on the training at all. Every little touch from Haknyeon brought you right back to the situation before. You wondered all the time what it would have been like if he had actually kissed you. Haknyeon was not much different. He just stared at you and didn't complain when you did something obviously wrong. When you both took a break, you both fell silent. Just when you could no longer stand the silence, Haknyeon took your hands and pulled you towards him so that you were pressed against his chest.
"Tell me when to stop," he murmured as he placed one hand on the back of your neck and the other on your waist.
You looked at him wide-eyed. He smiled softly at you as he pulled you impossibly closer. You smiled back at him.
“Why are you so beautiful?” he whispered against your lips.
His nose gently touched yours and you closed your eyes again. You hoped he wouldn't push you away again. He didn't. Instead, you felt his lips on yours.
The kiss started out hesitantly and very soft. But once Haknyeon realised you wanted this as much as him, the kiss got more intense. His hand on your neck pulled your more into the kiss. You couldn't help the little whine that left your lips when Haknyeon lips pulled away from you. Your lips chased his and with a deep chuckle, he gave in and kissed you again.
He slowly moved you backwards while kissing you and then he pressed your back against a tree. You moaned into the kiss and Haknyeon tongue slipped into your mouth. Your body felt hot and tingly as Haknyeon pressed his hips into yours. You pulled away since you really needed to breathe. He on the other hand didn't want to stop so he kissed down your neck. At a very sensitive spot, he stayed a little longer and slightly bit your skin. You whined and your hand went into his hair. You pulled it, so his lips will connect again with yours. Haknyeon obeyed and kissed you again with a lot of passion. Your hand that wasn’t in his hair roamed his chest and abdomen, which made him release a moan into the kiss. His moan excited you more than you expected and you pulled his hips closer to yours as wrapped a leg around his hips. His hand immediately started caressing your thigh.
You were so into kissing him that you almost didn’t hear the howl. It was unusual. Normally the howling could only be heard at night. Haknyeon heard it too and immediately he pulled away from you, but still kept you close. He swore under his breath and pulled you to the direction of your cottage.
“Why is it awake now? I thought it was nocturnal?” you whispered.
“I don’t know!” Haknyeon whispered back and constantly checked your surroundings.
You believed him. Something in you told, he being honest with you. The beast didn’t howl a second time and you made it safely to your cottage.
“Haknyeon?” you said as you took his hands and pulled him closer to you.
Almost naturally, his lips found your temple and he placed a kiss there.
“Yes, my love?” he said as he smiled at you.
You already hated yourself for what you were about to do.
“Please don’t get mad at me. But I really want you to stay here with me. It worries me, that you’re out there alone with the beast.”
“I’m fine. Don’t worry, ok?”
“You say that every time. I don’t understand that. Please explain it to me. Why is it so bad to stay here with me? You’re not a burden if you think that. I like you and I think you know that.”
He sighed: “I like you too. I really do. And that is one of the reasons I can't stay here… Wait no, that sounded kind of wrong. You're not the reason why I don't want to stay with you. I'm the problem, ok?"
"Haknyeon, you're not a problem," you said as you took his face into your hands to make him look at you.
You saw how sad his eyes looked and how emotional he got over it.
“Stay with me.”, you whispered as your felt your eyes water, “You’re not a problem, ok?”
He hesitated, but then he nodded. Later that night, you thought you should have made him promised to stay the whole night. You hadn't been asleep for very long, but you woke up from the sound of the door being closed. You looked around and found that the spot on the floor, where Haknyeon insisted he would sleep on, was empty. You cursed as you looked out of the window and saw a figure hurrying into the forest.
You locked the door from the inside. He shouldn’t come back in the morning and pretend he stayed here all night. He wasn’t fooling anybody here. Angrily, you went back to bed. The next morning, Haknyeon wasn't there and didn't appear for the next two days. But Gaston was there and he showed a lot of interest in the rose Haknyeon has gifted you. He was very curious about who gave you this rose. You only answered him it's from a boy, but more you didn't give out more information. You were still angry at Haknyeon, but you still wanted him to be your secret.
You regretted telling Gaston not more about Haknyeon when Gaston came with a massive bouquet of roses. You were actually waiting for Haknyeon. Today it was his turn to train you and you hoped he would actually appear and you could talk about what has happened. But instead of Haknyeon, Gaston appeared with his massive bouquet. A little confused you took his gift and let him in.
“Y/N! There is something very important I need to ask you.”
“What is it?” you asked as you turned around.
Gaston was kneeling one knee before you and took your hand: “Do you want to marry me?”
You were speechless.
“G-Gaston…” you stammered, "I didn't even know you liked me that way!"
“Well, you’re pretty and I’m quite handsome myself. It only makes sense if we marry. Everyone in the village is already wondering.”
“B-But…” you stammered, your gaze fell onto Haknyeon’s rose.
Gaston followed your gaze.
“This boy is nothing. I can give you everything you want and need. I got you dozen of roses.”
"Still, I don't think I can marry you," you answered.
You liked Gaston, yeah but as a friend. You don’t think he could erupt the same feelings you felt with Haknyeon that afternoon in the forest.
Speaking of the devil, there was a knock at the door and you heard Haknyeon calling your name.
Gaston raised an eyebrow: “Is that your boy?”
You didn’t answer and Gaston stood up.
“I won’t give you up. You’re destined to marry me.”, he said to you.
As Haknyeon knocked again, Gaston ripped open the door and immediately grabbed him by his neck. You couldn’t help but embarrassingly squeak Haknyeons name. His eyes instantly found yours and he gave your sad smile. In his eyes, you saw how sorry he was and knew that he had angered and disappointed you. Gaston pushed him onto the grass and punched him full force in the stomach.
"Hands off my girl!"
"Stop it!" you shouted as you followed them. No one listened to you.
Haknyeon scrambled to his feet and unceremoniously punched Gaston in the jaw.
"I don't think she's YOUR girl. Who do you think you are? Walk-in on her with a bouquet of flowers and think you've been courting her?"
Gaston muttered something unintelligible and lunged at Haknyeon. Haknyeon deftly dodged and pushed Gaston to the ground.
"Get out of here," Haknyeon growled to Gaston.
Your father had witnessed the tumult and was now at your side.
"What's going on here?" he asked, and you didn't quite know how to explain to him that you had just been proposed to by the village beau, had turned him down, and now Gaston and Haknyeon were fighting.
It was like something out of a cheesy novel. Your father didn't seem to expect an answer and approached the two. They both stopped fighting and your father told them both that it was not right to run around on his property and that they should get lost. A little perplexed, they both stared at your father but agreed. Gaston went towards the village while Haknyeon went to the forest.
When Haknyeon reached the forest, he turned to you again. Your heart ached and you couldn't explain why you wanted to run to him when you were so angry with him.
Your father came to you again and said: "Those tramps. They must have wanted to steal my invention!”
You couldn't help but smile at that.
"How about a cup of tea and a piece of cake, my dear?" your father asked.
You agreed and turned your back on Haknyeon, who was still staring at you.
Later, when you were about to start cooking dinner, it knocked again. You sighed hoping it wasn’t Gaston again. You opened the door and Haknyeon stood there.
Before you could say anything or even let him in, he said: “Hey, I know you probably don’t want to see me, but I really need to apologize.”
You open the door a bit wider to let him in and went to the stove to make some tea. Haknyeon closed the door behind him and sat down at the kitchen table.
"I'm really sorry, Y/N!" Haknyeon started, "I shouldn't have said these things to your potential suitor and shouldn't punch him. I'm sure he is a nice guy. I'm sorry I ruined his proposal. You're going to marry anyway, right?"
Astonished, you turned around. "What makes you think I want to marry him? Actually, his proposal took me completely by surprise."
Haknyeon smiled sheepishly: "I can understand him very well on that point. Who wouldn't want to marry you?"
You felt your cheek flush and tried to concentrate on pouring the tea.
"I don't want to marry him and I won't!" you said quietly as you put the tea down in front of Haknyeon.
When you looked up, Haknyeon was already looking at you and his look was somehow hopeful. But there was more. But before you could lose yourself in his eyes, you turned away again.
"I'm still mad at you though. Not because you ruined the proposal."
"Look, I know, I shouldn't have left that night. But I can't stay here."
You started to get very annoyed: "Why not? Just tell me!"
"I can't!" he replied.
"Then leave and don't come back until you can."
Haknyeon was silent for a moment but then stood up.
Just as you were beginning to regret your words, he said, "Please don't try to kill the beast, ok? It will kill you first!"
"Go!" you replied coldly.
With a sigh, he left into the rain again. As you watched him go, you decided the beast will die soon.
The next days you prepared everything for your beast hunt. Gaston showed up one day to ask again if you want to marry him. You dismiss him with a simple no and after a while, he left. Haknyeon didn't show up, but you secretly wished he would. Your heart seemed to long for him. Your dreams were filled with him and every time you thought about him, your heart ached. Is that what love feels like?
You also prepare everything in case you won't survive the night. Someone needed to take care of your father. You talked to an old lady in the village and she agreed to look after him in two days. Her husband was a soldier and when he came back he had also lost his mind. He was now in the asylum and his wife was forbidden to visit him. She understood that you couldn’t let your father go there.
As the night of the beast hunt came, you felt a tiny bit nervous. It was raining, which means finding the traces of the beast would be hard. Also was there a higher risk of slipping. But you went anyways. Not much later, the howling of the beast started. It must have been near you. You started walking in the direction of the howling. You needed to find the beast before it found you, so you hurried through the forest.
The training had made you more agile and now you practically flew through the forest. The next howl was very far away and came from a completely different direction. You changed your direction and a little bit later you found your first traces of the beast. You followed those, but you never came close to the howling.
You were confused. Where is this beast? It is a predator. They don’t hide.
You kept following the traces which ended in the ruins where Haknyeon lived. And then you saw it. His deformed body was on top of one of the ruins. His red gleaming eyes were staring at you. You stood there frozen. The beast didn’t move as well. Is Haknyeon here? Where is he? Is he hurt?
You looked around for him. You heard a loud thud and when you looked up again the beast had disappeared.
“Haknyeon?” you yelled and started searching the ruins for him.
The thought of him being hurt sent you into complete panic mode. You searched the ruins and its surrounding the whole night. No trace of him. Luckily, the beast didn’t come back.
In the early morning hours, you found Haknyeon. He was covered in dirt and blood. He was lying unconscious in a small stream. You ran over to him and dragged his head out of the water and into your lap. With shaking hands, you tried to feel his pulse. When you felt his pulse, breathed out loudly, feeling relieved. You shook him gently while caressing his hair. Slowly he opened his eyes.
As he saw you he smiled and your heart skipped a beat. His hand reached up to your face and gently whipped away your tears. You didn’t even realise you were crying.
“What happened? Why are you crying, beautiful?” he asked with a hoarse voice.
“You happened! I thought you were dead. I searched the whole night for you.”
“You did?” he asked.
The surprise was on his face for a short second but then it was replaced with a cocky smirk.
“You like me!” he stated.
“I thought you know that!” you replied and splashed some water in his face.
A boyish grin took over his face and he moved away from your lap and started splashing you with water as well.
You giggled: “Stop. Aren’t you hurt?”
“Nope!” he replied and continued on with splashing water at you.
You decided to also attack him with water. And soon you both played fighting in the middle of the small stream and you both couldn't stop giggling. Haknyeon’s arms were wrapped around you to keep you from splashing water at him. You squirmed in his grip as he pulled you close to him. You stopped squirming when you realised your faces were only inches apart. You looked into his eyes which were staring so lovingly at you. It still hurt that he wouldn’t tell you why he is staying in the forest. It just didn’t make sense. Doesn’t he trust you enough? You just wanted him to be safe.
He laid his forehead against yours and as if he had heard your thought he said: “I’m sorry. I just can’t tell you everything. And I’m afraid you run away from me!”
“Please try!”, you mumbled.
Both of your eyes began to water.
He placed a fleeting kiss on your lips and then whispered: "I'm cursed. And I physically can't tell you anything about my curse."
“The curse keeps you in the forest?” you asked and he nodded.
You slung your arms around his neck and hugged him. He pushed his head into your neck.
You heard of curses before. You knew there weren’t just stories to scare children. When you were younger, there was this cursed man who couldn’t remember his name and life anymore. He didn’t even know he was cursed. The curse was broken when he found out was his name was.
“Can you show me your curse?” you asked.
He shook his head.
“Do you know how to break it?”
“I have an idea. But it feels impossible," he mumbled into your neck and cuddled closer to you.
“I will try to help you, ok?”
He just nodded at that and moved his hand under your thigh to carry you. With you in his arms, he went out of the water and laid you gently on the grass growing at the edge. He bent over you and looked at you again with those loving eyes.
"You are the best thing that has ever happened to me," he said softly, his hand tenderly stroking your cheek.
You smiled at him and pulled his face closer to you.
Then, he kissed you. You still had so many questions, but his kiss and his proximity made you forget about everything. As his lips moved against yours, time seemed to stop and nothing else but he was important now. As he slowly pulled away, you didn’t allow him to be more than a few centimetres away from your lips. He chuckled lowly. One of his hands caressed your side lovingly.
“I’m not going anywhere!” he breathed out against your lips.
“You’re not close enough!” you replied, still a little breathless.
Still, you pulled him into another kiss. This one was more intense and you wrapped your legs around his waist to pull his body flush against yours. Haknyeon groaned into the kiss when your hips touched. He couldn’t help but grind a little into you, which made you moan in return. Your hand went into his hair and you pulled lightly. He kissed you again with more lust. Your body began to feel very hot from the fiery kisses you shared and you wanted more of him.
But Haknyeon began to slow down the kiss. You whined against his lips. He pecked your lips several times as an apology.
“You don’t deserve this. I should take you to the castle and make love to you on a huge bed.” Haknyeon mumbled with his eyes still closed.
“Which castle?” you giggled and softly run your fingers through his still-wet hair.
A blush crept up his cheek: "The one, you deserve to live in.”
You giggled again and Haknyeon showered you with short pecks all over your face, so would keep giggling. When he was finished, he smiled proudly at you. A small breeze came through the trees and made you shiver. You were still soaking from the rain last night and your shenanigans in the water with Haknyeon. He noticed immediately and rubbed your arms to warm you up a little bit.
“We should get you home before you get sick. Your father is probably worried.” Haknyeon said and sat up while pulling you with him.
As you two walked through the forest, Haknyeon kept you close to him in hopes to warm you a little bit.
“Has the Beast something to do with the curse?” you asked as you reached the meadow by your cottage.
Haknyeon didn’t answer but he didn’t have to. You were pretty sure that his curse and the beast were connected.
As you reached the cottage, you told Haknyeon to wait for a minute. Inside you went straight to your jewellery box and took out an amulet with a rose on it. You went back to Haknyeon and told him to close his eyes. With a grin, he closed his eyes and then he tried to relax his lips.
He was hoping you would kiss him and you couldn't let him down, so you gave him a quick kiss. Haknyeon had other plans. He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you closer, effectively prolonging the kiss. You smiled against his lips and softly laid the amulet around his neck.
As the lock clicked into place, Haknyeon detached himself from you. He looked back and forth between you and the amulet in amazement.
“It’s a little present. So you’re not completely alone. I’m always with you.” you explained and felt heat rush to your cheeks again.
Haknyeon’s cheeks also turned red but looked really touched and grateful. He pulled you again into a kiss. It was a very soft and loving kiss.
“When will I see you again?”, you asked him.
“Soon. I try to come tomorrow, okay?”
You only nodded. Your heart ached at the thought of letting him go.
“Will you promise to stay out of the forest?”
“Nope!”
He sighed: “I already thought so. But I thought asking wouldn’t hurt.”
He gave you a kiss on your temple and mumbled: “Thank you!”
You smiled at him and neither of you wanted to go.
“Please go inside now and warm up.”, Haknyeon whispered against your hair as he pulled you into a hug.
“Not before you leave!”, you replied.
Slowly, Haknyeon let go of you and started to walk backwards.
“Turn around. You will fall!” you scolded him.
He just grinned and shook his head. So you have to endure, Haknyeon walking backwards to the forest. When he has disappeared between the trees, you want into the cottage to wash up.
You had a lot to do today. First of all, tell the old lady in the village you survived the night and she doesn’t have to look after your father. Secondly, visit the library to find out more about curses and how to break them. And lastly, find a way to kill the beast. The beast puts Haknyeon in danger every night and maybe if the beast is dead, his curse will be broken.
After visiting the old lady, you went to the library. You found out if you’re cursed you can’t talk about your curse and how to break it. People close to the cursed shouldn’t help, that’s why witches took this precaution. A witch couldn’t take back her curse, so searching for the witch who cursed Haknyeon wasn’t really an option.
The curses are often inspired by fairytales. You searched in your mind, for a fairytale with a beast. The first one that came to your mind was Beauty and The Beast. Could Haknyeon be the Beast? You thought back to the first night you met both of them. He saved you from the beast and you once heard the beast while you were with Haknyeon. It didn’t really make sense. But maybe killing the beast isn’t the best idea. Just in case, you thought. Maybe catching the beast with a trap would get you more clarity. But you knew nothing about traps, so you decided to visit Gaston.
Gaston wasn’t home, but he was in the local tavern. You didn’t have a good feeling while you entered the tavern. You spotted Gaston drinking with his friend in a corner. You walked over to them.
“Hi! Gaston? Do you have a minute?”
“Have you changed your mind?” he slurred and almost fell out of his chair.
His friend laughed.
“No, but I need your help. I need to know how to build a trap!” you said.
“Depends on what you want to catch?”, a friend of his who is much soberer answered.
“A beast?”, you said and they all laughed again.
One of the older hunters came to the table: “A beast? The same story that your father tries to tell us?”
You hesitantly nodded and everyone else laughed.
“Get the pastor and send someone to the cottage to get her father. They both have lost their mind. They’re crazy. She keeps seeing a boy that doesn’t exist.” Gaston said, he still sounded drunk but no one cared.
He was popular, after all. You, on the other hand, weren't.
“Is that true? You see a boy?” a middle-aged woman asked.
“No. Haknyeon does really exist," you replied angrily.
“Oh, he has a name.” the woman laughed and everyone else joined.
“And where does your boy live?”
“In the forest!” you replied before you could shut yourself up.
Everyone laughed again but you didn’t care. You needed to get out of here. As you turned to the door to leave as fast as possible, the older hunter gripped your arm so tight that it hurt.
“Let me go!”, you hissed, but it was no use.
Before you knew it, you were locked in a carriage. Not much later, the villagers threw your father into the carriage with you.
"Papa! Are you all right?" you asked as you crawled to him.
He nodded, dazed.
"My dear, what are they going to do to us?"
You shrugged even though you already had a pretty good idea where they were going to take you. To the asylum. The carriage started moving. When the carriage stopped, you were met by guards in front of the asylum. When the heavy gates closed behind you, you felt so helpless again. How you hated that feeling. Would it never end?
Your father and you were locked in a cell together with the comment that the doctor would be here soon to take you for a first examination.
"I didn't know we were sick, my dear," your father said.
"We're not!" you grumbled as you paced up and down the cell.
Your father lay down on one of the beds. You didn't understand how he could relax with the agonising screams that came to you from time to time. You had to find a way out of here as quickly as possible.
The doctor arrived earlier than expected and had guards lead you both through the building to an examination room. On the way, you caught a glimpse of a crowd of tortured souls sitting whimpering in the corners of their cells. Soon your father and you would be one of them. And you could no longer help Haknyeon? But maybe he could help you? But that only happened in fairy tales. Gaston and his friends would probably hunt him to death at the latest. You really underestimated Gaston's jealousy.
Your thoughts were interrupted by the sight of the examination room. All sorts of bloody equipment hung on the wall and the doctor donned a bloody apron. Your stomach turned and you began to struggle against the guards' grip.
"Well, let's start with the young lady."
You were strapped to the table so that you could no longer move. Another gag was shoved into your mouth.
"What are you doing with my daughter?" your father asked indignantly, "She doesn't know anything about my inventions!"
The doctor laughed and ordered the guards to tie him to the chair. He was also gagged, for you only heard muffled sounds from him.
“That will hurt now a little.” the doctor said and felt how something is injected into your arms.
Shortly afterwards you felt your body getting heavy and you couldn't even move your fingers. You were briefly lit up once in the eyes. Then something cool was pressed to your temples. A little later you heard a slight chill and then an unbelievable pain went through your body and your muscles tensed up. Your scream was stifled by the gag. You wanted to move away from the cold metal touching your head but there was no escape. After the third shock, you passed out and woke up when you were back in your cell.
Your father lay in the bed on the opposite side. You were feeling dizzy but you got up anyway to check up on your father. His breath was steady and didn’t seem to have any injuries. You sighed with relief and went back to your own bed. Your body felt drained from all energy and you just wanted to sleep. As laid down, you close your eyes and could feel sleep taking over.
But then you were startled awake by a howl. At first, you thought you were dreaming. But the howl became louder and you heard the clashing of metal against stones. Some patients screamed, but that wasn’t really unusually.
You got up again as you heard a roar again. It sounded like the beast. You went to the bars that separated you from your freedom. One of the patients, whose skull was shaved bald and covered with scars, ran past.
"Wait!" you shouted, "What's going on?"
"A beast is here and it's tearing open the cells!" the patient shouted in panic and ran on.
You tried as best you could to stick your head out of the cell to look in the direction where the patient had come from. More and more patients ran past you and the turmoil grew even bigger. The first thing you saw was his red eyes. It was indeed the beast, fighting its way through the corridor. By now there were also several guards trying to fight the beast.
You retreated back into the cell and crawled to your father. You shook him awake. Confused and dazed, he looked around.
"The beast is here!" you whispered and his gaze immediately cleared.
"Crawl under the bed, dear," he ordered you and you obeyed.
He came to you under the bed. A little later, the beast stood in front of your cell and tore the bars out of the wall and threw them at the guards. It was bigger than you remembered which didn’t make it any less frightening. It didn't notice you and went to the next cell. Your father crawled under the bed. You followed it and your father helped you up.
"Let's get out of here before it comes back," your father said and dragged you out of the now open cell.
He turned in the direction away from the beast, but you couldn't help turning around to look at the beast. It was by now surrounded by guards and had to endure several stabs from their spears. What if Haknyeon was the beast? Then you had to help him. And you stopped running.
"Come!" urged your father.
Then the beast looked up and looked you straight in the eye. All your focus was on the beast. It knocked the guards aside, slapping them against the wall like dolls. Then it ran towards you and your father called your name. But you did not react. You stood rooted to the spot. Why else would the beast be here if it is not Haknyeon?
The beast came to a halt in front of you and let out a growl. Then you discovered the amulet dangling around the beast's neck.
"Haknyeon!" you breathed and reached out your trembling hand to him.
The beast came even closer. Neither you nor the beast saw your father coming. He had taken the spear of an unconscious guard and was charging at the beast. When its muzzle touched your hand, it crackled in the air and the beast's chest began to glow.
It was into this glow that your father thrust his spear. The beast sacked to the ground.
"Haknyeon!" you shouted and ran to the beast, which slowly began to change into a boy.
Haknyeon knelt on the ground, the spear still in his chest. Blood began to pour out of his mouth.
He coughed a little before speaking softly, "You have broken the curse."
Tears streamed down your face as you panicked, trying to calm the bleeding around the spear.
"My brother and I were both very conceited, so a witch cursed us. Every night we would become beasts and the curse can only be broken if someone loves both sides of us," Haknyeon explained.
"I didn't know you had a brother," you said as you tried to prop him up.
"He was the one who had hurt you and also your father. He is now more beast than man. He has started to change during the day. Every night he wanted to go out of the forest to attack people. I fought with him every night to stop him."
Everything seemed to make sense now.
"What is your brother doing now?" you asked, realising what it might mean if Haknyeon was here now and not stopping his brother.
Haknyeon murmured: "I'm sorry. I know the people in the village don't deserve it. But I couldn't leave you here."
You looked up to your father who was standing next to you pale as a sheet, guilt written all over his face.
"I-I'm sorry. I didn't know."
"It's okay. You were trying to protect your daughter. I probably would have done the same."
"You would never have hurt me!"
"No. I would have killed myself before that."
More tears stream down your face as Haknyeon's eyelids slowly began to flutter.
"No, please don't." you pleaded, "Stay with me!"
You heard the guards starting to collect the patients again and put them in other still intact cells.
"Go now! Get as far away as you can with your father. Start a new life, far away from here."
"No, I won't."
"I'm beyond help. Go!" he gasped, coughing up more blood.
"The boy is right. Let's go."
"I love you!" you murmured desperately, unwilling to break away from him.
"I love you too. You're the best thing that's happened to me. The most beautiful thing I've ever seen."
He smiled weakly and darted away briefly, driving the spear deeper into his chest. Your vision was blinded by your tears but you felt how you were picked up. You trashed against the hold, but the grip was strong. You saw the bleeding Haknyeon getting smaller and smaller. The last thing you saw was how he completely collapsed. You had found the love of your life and managed to break his curse, just to lose him.
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one-boring-person · 3 years ago
Note
If your still doing requests can you do a poly lost boys where there pretty much obsessed with the reader but she doesn’t want anything to do with them so they have to use there mind tricks on her please.
I'm sorry that this is so short, but I was a bit stuck for ideas 😅 I hope you like it, anyway!😊💛
Evening, Kitten.
The Lost Boys x reader
Warnings: mind control (I guess?)
Masterlist
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Thankfully, the Boardwalk isn't quite as busy as normal tonight, the popular attraction strangely empty and void of many people. A few roam the stretch, but most amble idly away from the usually heaving areas, the energy of the place distinctly lower than normal, for no apparent reason. As I walk down it, I try to think why it would be so empty, but nothing comes up, my mind too focused on getting where I need to - the video store.
It's surprisingly cold for a night in mid-July, a cool wind blowing around me as I hastily pull my jacket tighter around my shivering body, biting my lip against the uncomfortable chill. Mentally, I curse myself for going out tonight: i could've waited for a better night, but I was too impatient for my own good, so now I'm here, trekking halfway across town to get a movie I probably won't even like. My friends had recommended it to me, some vampire flick they had been raving about for weeks. I'd been sceptical, but they wouldn't let it alone, so I eventually gave in and promised to get hold of a copy, leading me to the Boardwalk on this cold night.
Harsh motorcycle engines roar at me suddenly, breaking me from my thoughts as four annoyingly familiar figures pull up beside me. Frowning, I try to ignore them, only for them to follow after me on their bikes, the sound quickly becoming irritating, a burst of frustration flooding through me as I reluctantly turn to face then. Instantly, the platinum blonde leader, David he had once introduced himself as, smirks and pulls to a halt, the others following suit.
"Evening, kitten. How's it going?" David greets me, eyeing me over as he speaks.
"Worse now that you showed up." I retort, unimpressed by the nickname.
"Aw come on, that's not nice." The tall blonde, Paul, pouts, blue eyes filled with playful teasing, "We aren't that bad!"
I scoff, turning away from them again.
"I beg to differ." I murmur, starting to walk away.
"Hey! Where are you going?" Another of them, Marko, calls after me, his grin almost audible in his voice.
"None of your business!" I snap back, rolling my eyes in exasperation. 
Just as I say this, however, an odd feeling starts up in my head, a nagging sense of need to turn back starting to chew at my patience. Shaking it off, I keep on going, a familiar sense of repulsion towards the four bikers accompanying the strange urge to return to them. Behind me, I can already hear them sniggering about me, the knowledge of which makes my jaw clench in anger.
Choosing to brush off the encounter and the new feeling, I carry on to the video store, starting to look around for the movie I'm here for. It doesn't take me long to find, but I still take some time, choosing to investigate some of the other flicks on offer as I do so; i find myself distracted, however, my head continuously returning to thoughts of the bikers I hate so much. Never before have I dwelt on an encounter with them, but for whatever reason I can't seem to get them out of my head tonight. Every corner I turn, I see either David or Dwayne browsing the collection of action movies, only for them to turn into unrecognizable people as I go closer, Paul and Marko almost always appearing near where I need to be, both giggling and grinning broadly. Shaking my head, I have to fight off the urge to snap at someone, feeling my irritation steadily growing, until something changes.
All of a sudden, I've forgotten why I hate them so much, and I start to look for them around the shop, curious as to where they are, wanting to find and talk to them. The movie in my hand is soon forgotten completely, and I put it back on a random shelf, striding out of the store to go find the boys, my head telling me too even though my heart is willing me to stop. Something is off about this, but I can't help it: I have to go to them. I have to be one of them. 
Somewhere inside my head, alarm bells are going off, the sane part of my brain screaming at me to stop and go back, telling me that something is very wrong about this, even as I step past the sparse people around. Everytime my common sense starts to creep back in, however, something pushes it back down again, and I feel a renewed sense of needing to be with them. It doesn't take me long to find them, and I'm quick to run over to them, vaguely realising how stupid I must look.
"Hey there, Kitten. What's got you in such a rush?" David drawls, smirking knowingly at me.
"I...I don't know..?" Is all I manage to respond with, my worldly intelligence completely leaving me now as I try to figure out just why I've run over to the four people I hate the most.
"You don't know? How's that?" Dwayne grins from his position beside David, dark hair falling into his face.
"I…" 
"Aw, she's speechless! How cute!" Paul giggles, coming closer and slinging an arm around my shoulders, pulling me into his body. Normally, I'd instantly push away from him and slap him for being inappropriate, but tonight? For whatever reason, I find myself leaning into him.
"And she wants a cuddle? That's very cute." Marko teases, lifting a hand to run it over the tips of my hair, smirking at me.
"Now, now boys. Let's not make it uncomfortable." David interjects, gesturing for Paul to pass me to him, which I allow him to do, despite the unwillingness in my head. It's a horrible feeling, my body not listening to me in any way, doing what something else wants it to do, and I have no idea where it came from, but the nagging sensation in my head is now much more prominent. 
It takes me a moment, but eventually I figure out who's voice it is telling me to obey what the boys are saying: it's David's. Somehow, I can hear his voice in my head, telling me exactly what to do in a way that is clearly non-negotiable, the use of which sparks up my temper, but also induces a sense of...desire? What?
"Come on, wanna come with us back to our place?" David offers me, smirking profusely as he watches me mentally struggle.
"Yes please." I say, somewhat against my will - a part of me has always been curious as to where these boys live.
"Ok, hold on tight." The platinum blonde grins, waiting for me to climb onto his motorcycle behind him.
Still unsure of what I'm doing, i do so, holding onto his waist as he starts up the vehicle.
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oftenderweapons · 4 years ago
Text
The Studio - Namjoon
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Pairing: Namjoon x reader (nicknamed Vixen)
Wordcount: 9.7k words
Genre: smut, angst, fluff
Rating: 18+
I told you I’d be back really soon ;) Tonight there’s a lot on schedule! I’ve been working on this piece for two weeks, since it carries a lot for both Namjoon and Vixen, emotionally speaking. It means a lot for me too, since to me it was truly a challenge in terms of the different levels of knowledge that Joon, y/n and the narrator hold. I think I’ve grown a lot in terms of writing even from Tiktok Towel Trick, which I wrote last May, but I’m really proud of myself comparing to what I used to produce a couple years ago.
Now, let me introduce this fic. The piece takes place two or three months after the two have started sleeping together (ideally late January or February). In this piece Vixen visits Joon at the studio after a bad fight and Joon’s self-imposed isolation. The two feel like they’ve come to a dead-end as they wait for the other person to cut ties. Namjoon is suffocated by his job, his tendency to lash out at his closest ones when he’s stressed and his previous traumas; Vixen is locked in her head, shut out by Namjoon and repeatedly accused of infidelity, as a sign of Namjoon’s lack of trust. Will the two manage to work things out?
Description and trigger warnings: The piece was written referring to Namjoon’s Rkive as in his vlive log. There is ANGST. Loads. There is some crying and it is not Vixen’s. Longing and miscommunication. In terms of filth: so much dirty talking the walls exude holy water by now. Unprotected sex (STAY SAFE GUYS!!!!!!!!), DDLG/daddy kink, Masturbation paired up with Voyeurism and Exhibitionism, Fetishism (Shoes, tights and lingerie), Oral (female receiving), Cumplay (eating), Marking, Spanking, Angsty doggy fucking followed by a very soft ride on the sofa. That should be all. Fluff alarm: Namjoon doesn’t want to lose his little fox and Vixen just wants to cuddle her big teddy bear Joon. 
Wordcount: 9.7k
Here is my masterlist
Enjoy!!! 
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Standing in the main corridor of the studios felt very strange. You looked around, uncomfortable, while the receptionist at your side stared at you, waiting. "Don't worry, he's busy all the time. We can wait, no big deal." The fact that you'd been greeted by Namjoon's driver at the entry desk had helped you get to the studios unannounced. "That boy always gets caught up on something. He shouldn't make you wait." He tutted, looking at you with a kind smile. 
"____? What are you doing here?" Taehyung smiled at you brightly, close behind him Hoseok and Yoongi approached with heavy-looking bags on them. 
"Oh, hi. I sort of stopped by for Namjoon." You bit your lip, smiling embarrassedly. 
"He's still in his room. I can show you the way." Taehyung said, grinning. 
Yoongi seemed to be observing him closely while Hoseok looked absolutely oblivious. 
"No, I only have to give him this." You showed them two small bags, one containing food and the other a few things he had left at your place. 
You tried not to let your heartbreak show. 
"Maybe you could bring them to him, I don't want to distract him." 
You smiled but you felt the tears welling up. 
Yoongi's glance moved to you. It felt scorching. "I think you should bring those to him. I think he'd like to see you." His serious tone made you realise that maybe he did know what was happening. Maybe he did know better. 
"I think he'd rather not see me right now." Your lips tightened in a thin line. 
Both the guys turned to Yoongi. "Go, I'll see you tomorrow."
They both patted him on the shoulder and waved at you, Taehyung hugging you close. "It'll be alright. I'll see you."
Taehyung smiled at you, his cute cheeks popping upwards. Maybe it had to do with the fact that you had just granted him an exclusive piece by one of his favourite photographers. Maybe he was just friendly, maybe he simply liked you because he deemed you a decent human being. 
Right at his heels, Hoseok gave you a cute wave, saying bye-bye in a cartoonish voice. 
Beside you, Yoongi shook his head, still sporting a fond smile. "Uhm, I never know whether I should introduce myself. Anyway, we've never met before, so– I'm Yoongi. " He said with a tiny smile, his cheeks jumping upwards. 
You introduced yourself with a small bow. 
"You are just like he described you. He talks about you a lot." He commented. You blushed, almost feeling like dissolving into thin air. You never thought you would meet his friends like this. 
Yoongi looked at your face. "You're exactly his type — in the best way possible." He blushed. "Let's go." He said, leading you. "I actually want to say a few things." He threw his bag on the floor, getting comfortable on the sofa in the common room. "How are you doing?" 
You stared at your feet. "Decent enough."
"I'll be honest, ____. He hasn't been doing good. Not even decent, in my opinion." Yoongi announced, as if trying to prepare you for what you were going to see. "I feel like telling you a couple things about him. He can be hot-headed, and an absolute pain in the ass. He is a perfectionist, and a terrifically clumsy one at that." Yoongi huffed out. "He holds himself to extremely high standards and punishes himself whenever he feels like he's not delivering. And he has the horrible tendency to lash out when he's stressed. He just takes it all out on those who are closest to him." Yoongi patted the spot at his side, inviting you to sit. "I'll be inappropriate, maybe, but I have to say it. You don't have to stay at his side."
The sentence was like a slap to your face. It had never come to your mind to part ways with him. 
"You don't have to put yourself through his tempers and tantrums. You need to be ready to handle those emotionally. If you aren't, I don't think you'll be able to go for the long run." Yoongi looked at you in the eye. "Sorry if I overstepped, usually people come to me to talk, I'm not used to giving unsolicited advice." He blushed and laced his fingers together, laying them on his thighs. 
"I don't want to let go of him, Yoongi." You confessed. 
"Then you should go bring this stuff to him in person. And remember, you don't have to be his therapist. If you want, you can be his partner, walk by his side, but it's not your duty to carry him." The man was incredibly smart and thoughtful. And sensitive. The more you got to know him, the more you understood Namjoon's adoration for him. 
"Thank you so much." You bowed your head briefly, placing your palm on top of his hands. 
He moved one on top of yours, patting gently. "Let's go find your grumpy bear, uh?" 
With a groaned "aigoo" He pushed himself up, standing on his feet like an old man before bending to catch the strap of his bag. "This way." 
He led you through the winding corridors until you recognised the door to Namjoon's studio. "Go on. Knock politely and be smart. Discuss. Negotiate. Compromise. And be kind to each other." He gave you the official salute and left. 
You found yourself staring at the door, wondering if he'd roar at you for interrupting him. 
The room sounded quiet. 
You counted to three. Knocked. 
"Come in." Said his voice with a weak rumble. He was probably distracted. 
His studio was warm and welcoming, if a bit clustered. The lights were low and yellowy, coming from his desk and contrasting with the white gleam of his computer screen, still you could see everything perfectly in the slight penumbra, your eyes perusing your surroundings. It was easy to see why his apartment felt like a hotel room: he barely spent time there while this place really felt like home. It felt like stepping into his soul. Small sculptures and toys and collectibles were neatly lined in his bookcase together with some books. Then the baby shoes. Art catalogues. Candles. Art. A drape too big for the wall, but still there, a painting, probably from Yoongi, since you vaguely recognised his style. On the back wall, you noticed two drapes embroidered in traditional patterns. The floor was covered in thick cream carpets with geometric prints that reminded you of tribal symbols. And sweet lord, that was his wooden, swoon-worthy, customised low table, matching with the piece by the door holding one of his bonsai. A comfy couch with a fluffy, warm blanket, and embroidered pillows. You were mesmerised. You didn't have time to take it all in, your glance running from the upright piano to the microphone standing beside his chair. He didn't turn around, he kept staring at the screen, typing every now and then. His beautiful desk was crowded with stationery, electronic devices, a keyboard and all kinds of knicknacks. 
"What is– oh. Hi." His expression was ice-cold. 
"Hi. I was passing by, I wanted to bring you some stuff you'd left at mine."
His heart froze. This is the end then.
He'd been avoiding it for almost two weeks, hiding from you in his studio, even though the only things he could write were heartbreaking blue rhymes that had Jimin and Jeongguk exchanging pitying glances. 
The beginning of this tragedy was almost comedic in its stupid futility. It was just him incapable of perfecting a pre-chorus. A dumb verse or something. He had called you, talked it out but apparently all he did was just turn down your ideas and suggestions, snapping at you until you exhaustedly told him that you were tired and needed some sleep. He took that as you umpteenth sign that you didn't care about him — which you both knew was entirely wrong — and caused a huge fight which ended on you telling him to go fuck himself, at which he unceremoniously replied that he was okay with that since you were clearly already fucking someone else. 
You didn't bother correcting him, since no matter how many times you told him, he always seemed to get back at you being unfaithful and uncaring. You were done justifying yourself, apologising for things you had never done. 
"Uhm. I also brought you some food. I didn't know if you had already eaten."
He looked at you like you had finally lit a candle in a dark and cold room. 
Your heart broke some more. You asked yourself if there was any more breaking to do, at this point. 
You figured there was the moment you heard his hoarse voice speak. "Let's eat together."
You didn't have the guts to deny him. 
You laid the bags on the small table and took off your coat. He stood on his feet immediately, crossing the room in a few broad steps and hugging you to his chest. 
Let it hurt. You told yourself. It heals faster like that. 
His palms settled at your waist and his eyes closed. He breathed you in. He had never felt something really end. His exes were like a song slowly slipping into a diminuendo until they became silence. His interest burned out, his curiosity simply died down and the feelings never seemed to grow fully. They felt like a balloon which was never supposed to be blown that big. This thing with you was like a song being stopped mid-chorus, silence biting in where it wasn't supposed to be. Is this what the end feels like? He asked himself as he held you tighter, one of his hands climbing up and burrowing into your hair. He pressed your face into his chest, where his heartbeat was so strong and so loud that you asked yourself if you could somehow amplify it, if your body could register it and replay it once you were alone in your bed, mourning over this. "You feel taller." He said, noticing how your forehead reached his lips instead of slotting under his jaw. 
"I still have my heels on." You replied. 
"Wanna take 'em off?" He asked. 
You shook your head. "No, if that's not a problem. 
He breathed out heavily. He interpreted your refusal as a sign that first, you were keeping your tough-woman shield up — which he couldn't blame you — and second, you weren't intending to stay long. 
You tried to part yourself from him. "One more second, little Vixen. Just a second." He whispered. 
You allowed him. 
"Come on, dinner is getting cold." You said softly. 
He didn't let you go, he simply loosened his grip and dragged you to the sofa. He was willing to keep you as close as he could until you ripped the bandaid off, unraveling this small spell that had turned his life into a perfect, dreamlike snowball. 
Sitting on the sofa, he made you sit beside him, your side sticking to his from shoulder to hip to knee to ankle. 
It was all too much but you didn't have the strength to part from him. He bent down and opened the small boxes. 
It was fried chicken. 
Like the first time at his place, at two am, naked in his bed after he had owned you in every way that mattered. 
He loved fried chicken. And now it would always mean you to him. 
No chimaek after fucking with anyone else. He wanted to keep it for you, in case one day you decided to come back, and he would say he had never done that with anyone else, that he had been waiting for you. Because some part of him told him that you would come back. 
Both your brains were going on the same path, already mourning someone who was right there in that moment, but already felt so far away. The room was quiet but both your minds were screaming, thinking so loud that the silence was welcome. 
"I got you fried chicken. I know you love it." 
I love you, his brain replied. But his mouth stayed silent. It was too late anyway. 
"Thank you." He said brusquely. He reprimanded himself for sounding so harsh. 
"It's okay." You said quietly, using the lid to grab a couple pieces out of the ten or so. You didn't feel like eating and he always ate two thirds of the box anyway. 
He exchanged one of your wings for a leg. "You prefer the leg." He said with a shy smile, trying to make up for the coldness he had shown previously. 
You had been sleeping with Namjoon for three months now, spending all your spare time together at his place, sometimes moving in for the weekend, the both of you leaving your job early so you could spend Friday afternoon together and go on small dates. He usually had his schedule on Saturdays and Sundays too, so it wasn't uncommon for you to spend several hours alone at his place. You had made small improvements, making his house feel more like a home with small handmade crafts. And when he came back, you would usually try to keep it chill but eventually you ended up in bed, or on the sofa, or the kitchen counter. Or the carpet on the corridor leading to his bedroom. Or the shower. Let's just say that you would be all over each other. 
You thought how different it would be now, and how difficult it would be to get him out of your system. 
"How is it going." You asked quietly after you swallowed your first bite. 
"Tough. I'm polishing some stuff, but this is the part where I doubt everything and want to rewrite all of it." He explained, his fingers gripping the chicken with a precision and finesse that reminded you of his delicate, careful side. 
"You'll get through it. You're a pro by now. And I'm sure you have excellent taste. You know what you want and you'll find your way to it." You praised him, rubbing your shoulder against him since your fingers were dirty. 
He leaned his head on your shoulder, shrinking down to reach you. "Thank you."
The more time passed, the more you realised he still hadn't said sorry for what he had implied during that phone call. 
"That's okay."
"How have you been doing?" He asked, trying not to let his worry show. It still showed, though. 
You decided on being honest. "I've been missing you."
He paused eating. "I've been missing you too." He put down the chicken, using the ball of his wrists to press against his temples. "I'm sorry about what I said that day. I know my past relationships and nerves are not valid excuses for how I treated you, but I got swallowed in those and I dragged you in."
You looked at the leg and finished munching on it, stripping the bone of the last few strings of meat. You put down the naked bone, licking your fingers. "You never talked about your most recent ex." You commented. 
He picked up his head. "To put it simply, I was her side piece." He said, plainly. "She was getting married to someone else. And she messed around with me." He looked at his feet. "At the beginning I didn't know. It lasted around eight months, as she was waiting for her fiancé to finish his military service. After I discovered it, we kept going for a couple weeks, but I found the whole thing so upsetting and disgusting that we parted ways. Her fiance forgave her and they got married a while ago, a few weeks before I met you." He snickered sarcastically. "I even sent them flowers." 
You blinked distractedly. "Joon, I'm so sorry, baby." You brushed your forehead against his arm. 
"It's cool. I mean, it's not since I'm still traumatised by it. I've been talking about it with my analyst, but it's been a while since I last went, almost three weeks, because this project had been swallowing me whole — after chewing me a little, clearly." He had his exhausted laugh on. 
You felt like you needed to talk about the whole story about that girl, but right now he didn't seem in the right mindset to do that. For now, knowing that he knew he had a bias and he was tackling the issue with a therapist was enough.
"Have you been sleeping, babe?" All the breaking up was momentarily suspended. There was something to save here. You had a lot you still wanted to save from this. 
He seemed relieved when you called him that. Don't get your hopes up. He shook his head. "A couple hours at a time. Small naps when I'm tired."
"Okay, so once you're done eating, we're gonna take a good, long nap."
He didn't want to sleep though. He wanted to hold you close, kiss you, make sure that he did everything he could to make you stay. The meal continued quietly, and as soon as you were fed he asked you about your job, how it was going, if you had any new clients or if you had met any new artists. You replied to each question fully, telling him about curious accidents and little inconveniences. 
And he listened. He had missed your voice and it felt good to listen to someone who wasn't himself or the boys' voices over speakers and headphones. 
As you were both done with dinner, he guided you to the bathroom, standing behind you as you washed your hands. He took some soap, foaming it up between his hands before he caught your left palm within his, pressing and rubbing them together to clean you up. And then he laced his fingers with yours, lathering your digits in bubbles and making sure that the sticky sauce from the chicken disappeared completely. He moved to the other hand as you laid your head against his chest at his collarbone, tipping it back so you could stare at him. You were sure you had never adored someone this much. He turned slightly to look at you, smiling softly. He bent down and pressed his lips to yours gently. No man, no person in the world had ever touched you or kissed you like he has. No one has ever talked to you like him, showed you their world like he has. He reluctantly parted from your lips. 
He led your joined hands to close the tap, moving to the hand dryer. It felt all too intimate. 
"Joon." 
"Let's get back to my studio, yeah?" He whispered in your ear. You nodded. 
He laced his hand with yours. 
Once you reached the studio, he quietly dragged you to the sofa, pulling at your arm so that you fell with your ass on his lap. He hugged you again. "I am so sorry about what I said. You have told me countless times that I'm the only one."
"You hurt me, Namjoon." You said quietly. 
It felt like a slap, his full name. 
"Let me make it right." He kissed your cheek and your eyes fell shut. "I want you."
And you wanted him too. You thought yourself crazy for wanting a man so complicated, someone who had disrespected you, who had repeatedly and blatantly demonstrated his lack of trust towards you. Still, when you needed reassurance, affection and devotion, your bodies always came into play, talking with a language so simple and obvious to each other that you simply nodded, whispering "I want you too."
With his index finger he turned your head, kissing you square on the lips and forcing you to part them, his tongue sweeping in your mouth, making your head spin with the intimacy and intensity of it all. 
Let him take you, if that would reassure him that you only thought about him, you wanted only him and no one else. 
His free hand curled around your thigh, climbing up under the tight knee-length dress you were wearing. The woolen grey number was the first thing to come off as he tugged it over your head and off his way. "You're so gorgeous," He murmured painfully, looking at you and taking in every small detail. "A work of art, little Vixen." He kissed your shoulder. 
You smiled shyly, trying to straddle his waist. He toyed with the lace covering your breasts and nipples, teasing them with his fingers until they pressed hard against the fabric. Next he fooled around with the waistband of your tights, making you stand between his legs as he dragged the nylon down your thighs and calves. He stared at your feet, where the garment bunched up, noticing your black stilettos. "Off." He whispered, tapping his foot against yours. Once you took off the shoes, he bent down to help your feet out of your tights. He bit your leg harshly, leaving a mark behind. "Heels on again, Vixen."
Smiling darkly, you slipped them back on, shivering a little, but so happy to wear your favourite black lace set and stilettos for him. 
"Walk for me?" He asked, making you put on a little show. 
And God, did you enjoy it. His jaw went slack at the Brazilian cut of your panties, exposing to his hungry eyes the perfect curve of your ass, the way it swelled fully before meeting with the back of your thigh. 
That was his favourite place to bite. And spank. 
You did a small catwalk with your back to him, reaching his chair, which you turned around from his desk to the sofa. Facing the chair, you bent forward, your thumbs catching the fabric of your panties at your sides and pushing them down as you bent forward, offering him the whole panorama. 
He groaned. "I'm gonna get an heart attack, baby." 
You smiled at him viciously over your shoulder, letting your lower piece of underwear fall to the floor. Next you dragged your full palm up the curve of your ass, smacking it playfully as your fingers made their way to the clasp of your bra. 
"You're gonna kill me, Vixen." He cried out. 
Bra undone, you let both strings fall down your shoulders, removing one side first and letting the garment dangle from the other side, making your arm fall and drop the delicate lace ordeal. 
Your smile disappeared in an innocent pout when you turned around, completely naked except for your shoes. 
"I'm gonna sit here." You announced, waiting for his approval. 
He nodded eagerly. "Make yourself comfy, Vixen."
You sat down, crossing your legs and propping your elbows on your knees. Shyness was not a word in your vocabulary in that moment. Your only intention was that of distracting him from whatever it was that was mauling his brain. 
"Are you going to make me wait, Joon." You teased demandingly. 
He stared at you, meeting your glance. "Stay there and sit still." He ordered before grabbing the hem of his sweater and pushing it upwards, taking off both sweater and undershirt in the process. His upper body appeared, a bit skinnier than two weeks ago but maybe it was just the distance and the slouching position. His sweatpants were taut around his lap and you bit your lip as your eyes traced the outline of his length. He laid his palm there, stroking himself over the cotton. "Missed you so much, baby." He groaned and huffed. His eyes closed, his hand grew tense, stronger and heavier. Licking your lips, you kept staring at him, squeezing your thighs as he touched himself for you. 
He was hot, all the time, but this… This felt like a fever dream. You were soaked. Thank god his chair was leather and it could be cleaned easily.
He moaned your name, his eyes struggling to open enough to look at you. His voice was so deep and needy, mixed with heavy huffs. "Namjoon." You whined. 
He opened his eyes fully, his hand coming to a halt. It was like a cold shower. He was reminded why you were doing this, why you had come to this, the sudden distance that had come within the two of you. "What is it, baby?" 
You pushed your ass against the chair, looking for friction. "Come here. Touch me." You begged. 
It pained him seeing you so needy and whiny and stressed. "Listen to me, baby thing. Listen very carefully." He wanted to reassure you but he couldn't come to you. "I need you to touch yourself, little one. Can you do that for me? I promise I'll touch you after you cum, baby, but I want to see you first." He asked, palming himself again. 
You licked your lips. "Can I?" You questioned innocently, placing your palm on your thigh, your fingertips grazing your crotch. 
"You can, doll. Do it for me." He growled, pushing his fingers under his waistband, grabbing his hard on at the base and stroking it as you parted your legs, exposing your wetness. You were beautiful, naked on his chair, dragging your middle finger along your dripping slit. Your other hand grabbed your breast. 
"You're a vision, Vixen. You're magnificent, pretty thing."
"I want your tongue, daddy." You mewled, your finger dipping inside, emerging covered in glossy wetness. 
He groaned, taking his cock out of his pants, moving the waistband to his thighs. “I’m gonna eat you later, pretty doll. I’ve been starving for weeks for that sweet cunt of yours.” His erection immediately sprung up, arching to his belly button, the lower tendon looking so inviting along that thick vein that always had him throwing his head back whenever you traced it with the tip of your front teeth. As your fingers met your clit, eliciting a whine from your throat, he used four fingers to press on the vein, his thumb already playing with the tip. His hands always looked incredible whenever he used them on himself, strong fingers and spidery tendons making the vision sinfully erotic. However, he was lost in you as much as you were lost in him, his lips parted, his breath panting while you opened your legs wider, using two fingers in small upward circles that teased the underside of your clit. You felt a chill run down your spine, your legs trembling and closing a little with an involuntary reflex. You giggled at that, closing your eyes and moving your grip to the armrest of the chair. Your upper body inched forward a little and your hand stopped. 
“Too much, babygirl?” He asked and you smiled brightly, nodding. 
You’re gonna miss it, the way she smiles when you’re doing it right, his brain reminded him and as a way to shut it up, he stroked himself faster, with more pressure, his spare hand brushing his abdomen and moving upwards, spreading over his pectoral, scratching the skin there before his thumb and forefinger curved around the base of his neck, pressing there. 
You observed the motion, unpausing the movement between your thighs and humming as he gave you his desperate stare, the one that meant that he couldn’t take it anymore, that he was on the verge of it and even the smallest addition to the current situation would have him screaming and cumming.
“Joonie, lemme get close. Cum in my mouth, Joon, please.” You whined. 
“No, naughty girl. Stay there and cum for daddy.” He groaned. “Come on, baby, I’m waiting for you.” He said, with a harsh and strained command. 
Arching your neck, you started moving faster, opening your legs as far as the armrests allowed, but they only allowed an inch more than what you already had. Huffing with disappointment, you closed them and propped the back of your right knee on top of the armrest and repeated the gesture with your left leg, spreading yourself wide, almost hitting a split with your legs bent at the knees. 
“God, you’re the dirtiest. You stretching it out for me? You’re so good, showing daddy how wet you are for him.” He teased, using that raspy voice that he knew always drives you insane. 
With short, quick breaths you brought yourself closer and closer to the edge. “Daddy, please, keep talking to me.”
His hand slowed down. “Need to hear my voice, babygirl?”
You nodded and he snickered. “Then I’ll talk to you, little one. You know what I’m gonna do after you cum? I’m gonna crawl to you and kneel between those wondrous legs of yours. I’m gonna push your ass to the edge of the seat and feast on you like I’m trying to die eating that pussy. And do you know what you’re gonna do, Vixen?” He provoked. 
You shook your head. “What am I going to do, daddy?” You questioned innocently, your words stumbling a few times as your breath got stuck somewhere in your throat.
“Oh, little fox, you’re gonna grab my hair and push that lovely cunt on my lips and tongue, fucking my face so hard and fast, pressing your sexy heels on my naked shoulders. I want to hear you gasp for air because I make you cum so good you forget to breathe, you forget how to speak.”
“Joon, I’m cumming.” You cried out, your legs starting to quiver and your clit getting too sensitive to stand the movement of your fingers, slipping them inside and pushing them in slow circles around your cervix. 
His fingers moved back to the tip, the other hand massaging his balls. “Take it, Vixen, that’s it baby. I’m cumming, ____.” He moaned your name, spilling his release on his lower stomach. 
You were still staring at each other with your chests heaving, eyes wild, hands stained by your pleasure. It was always the two of you. Always getting caught up in each other, always getting tangled in each other's fantasies with this constant lust pulling you in and never having enough. You wondered when the hunger would stop, when you would grow tired of his insecurity and possessiveness, when he would find out you're too kinky, too needy, too fucked up for a busy man like him to handle. 
He cleaned his hand with one of the unused paper towels from dinner, crumbling it and throwing it in the box with the garbage from dinner. 
"Joonie." You whispered, waiting. 
"Coming, baby fox." He replied, standing up and taking off his sweatpants and boxers, walking straight to you. You closed your legs, a bit cold and embarrassed now that your high was over. Standing right in front of you, he cupped your cheek, making you look up at his face, however, even though your head was tipped back, aimed at his eyes, your glance hung low, staring at the droplets smearing his abdomen. "What are you looking at, spoiled little fox?" He said, with a sardonic smile. 
"I wanna lick."
He grinned and scooped some liquid with his digit, bringing it to your lips. 
Parting your lips, you licked your lower one first, then you let your tongue dart out and swipe at his finger, carefully sucking it into your mouth before he lowered his eyes, staring into yours and smirking seducingly as he pulled his digit out. You smacked your lips and savoured his taste, your eyelids falling shut as you hummed at his flavour. 
His cock, once half soft, was now hardening again, swelling intermittently and slowly rising to his navel. But Namjoon's eyes were focused on your face. "Want more?" He asked once your eyes opened and your gaze focused on his face. With a sex-addled, lazy grin you nodded, opening your mouth. 
He grinned right back. "Such a hungry little girl."
Impatient, you grabbed his hips, pulling him towards you and licking his belly clean. He groaned, observing you closely. 
I'm going to teach her some patience and some manners, he thought darkly. However, he immediately reminded himself that he would never have the time, your liaison coming to an end.
With this unfortunate thought, he cupped your face. "I'm the one supposed to be eating now, ____. Let me take care of you, darling." He said, before falling to his knees. Immediately he pushed the back of the chair to the table, so that it wouldn't cartwheel out of his grasp. 
Once more you asked yourself how many times he had done that before, thinking about how the relationship with the bride-to-be must have been mostly sexual, since you don't usually have much romance and dates with someone who is taken. Even though he didn't know she was taken. Whatever. 
In that moment he was there, kneeling before you, placing your heels on his shoulders, cupping your ass and tipping it forward so he could easily and comfortably give you that first, glorious lick from your hole to your clit. "Taste so good." He said, nuzzling his lips side to side as he spoke, mixing the movement to the vibration of his voice. He bit the small tattoo at the top of your thigh, where it met your pelvis, just shy of your hip bone. "Sexy little thing." He kissed it. "Drove me insane since day one." As usual, he sucked at it, causing a dark purple mark to bloom over it. "Fucking perfect."
He laid his tongue flat against your slit drawing the tiniest circles with the whole length of it. 
You hand-combed his hair back, holding it so you could look into his dragon eyes. He looked vicious and dangerous and so cunning, so smart in the most atrocious way. 
"Namjoon." You moaned, your hips arching closer to his mouth. 
He snickered cockily, moving his tongue slowly back into his mouth, allowing only the tip to wander up your crevice and reach the apex of your labia. He delivered a set of ten licks, slow and curling perfectly against your nub. "Are you good, little fox?" He asked. 
You nodded and pushed his head back between your legs. 
He laughed loudly, fighting against you. "I'm not done talking, brat." He bit your lower belly gently. "I'm gonna pump your clit with my mouth, Vixen. I'll suck it twenty times, then I'll let you rest until I'm ready again. I'll keep going until you cum. Remember that after twenty I'll pause. This could easily turn into edgeplay, baby, so you'd better get very horny very fast. You okay, Vixen?"
He checked on you and you nodded, impatient to simply have him on your clit.
"Be verbal, little girl." He reprimanded.
"Yes, daddy."
"Good girl. Let's get started."
He wasted no time. He wrapped his lips around your clit and started sucking, sucking so hard that you knew the following day his jaw and ears would hurt. At pump fifteen you already knew you needed more than twenty to cum. And as twenty arrived you whined but you felt confident that the next set would suffice. 
This time you felt your edge at twelve, still you needed more. You were getting wetter and wetter, so soaked that his saliva and your slick mixed up and made you feel uncomfortable between your asscheeks. 
"Joon–" You said, at which he mumbled "language" in between two pumps. 
"Daddy, I want your fingers inside." You said, indulging his every whim. 
He fumbled around with his arms, securing you with his left, making sure that your backside wouldn't get too close to the edge of the seat, and cause you to fall. His right arm moved back to your front, his index and middle finger coming to your entrance and waiting, his drool sliding from his tongue down your slit and directly on his fingers which, now lubricated, slipped in with no friction or resistance. The pressure was mind-blowing, your head spinning. "Daddy, please."
"Please what?" He said, hitting his pause. 
"Make me cum. Let me." You asked, as meekly as you could. 
"Why should I, uh?" He teased. 
"Because I am a good girl." Because I love you, said an obnoxious part of your brain. 
"Then I need you to say it one last time, Vixen. I know I've tormented you, but I need to ask it once and for all. Is there anyone else?" He said, his voice almost breaking. 
"No, Namjoon. I swear to God, there's no one else. I promise it. I swear on everything that I love the most. Please." You begged, hoping that he would feel the desperate honesty in your voice. "Please. You're my only daddy. I have you, only you. I am yours." You said, and God if it felt right, if it felt true, being his, belonging to him. 
Tell him you love him, your brain said again, but you refused. 
He smiled brightly at your declaration. "We're done playing, if you want to, Vixen."
You simply nodded, batting your lashes at him. "I want to."
"Then hold tight because I'm not going to stop until you're fucking my face and screaming my name and shaking on this seat. Understood?" He warned you. 
"Yes, daddy." You replied. 
"Then hold tight, baby fox. I'm gonna eat you alive."
"Try." You challenged him. 
And that's when he pounced. His pumps became longer, impossibly tighter, and the small pause between one and the next became shorter. Your eyes locked with his, brows knitting together, lips parting in a mewl as you threw your head back. "Namjoon. Please, daddy." 
Smirking, he mixed the pumping motion with a barely-there curl of his tongue, teasing your clit with such delicate pressure that you couldn't even wrap your head around the incredible amount of tension that it was causing in your body. Your hands tightened in his hair, your moans dissolving into small giggles. 
He wanted to tell you how good you sounded, how pretty you looked, how he wanted to see this every day for the rest of his life. He loved seeing you this happy, this carried away. He loved your morning voice and your late night cuddles. He loved breakfast in bed and midnight snacks and three a.m. quickies. He loved watching you take off your bra from under your t-shirt before going to bed, he loved seeing you shiver as you went to the bathroom early in the morning, clad in his t-shirt, plain cotton briefs and a pair of socks even in the dead of winter, since he always kept you warm under the covers by holding you close. He wanted to confess it all: the heartwarming wonder he felt staring at you had when you focused while reading and studying, when you brushed your hair, when you got dressed before leaving for the day, when you stood at the kitchen counter, cooking, with your back to him, and again when you applied lotion all over your body after showering, when he kissed your nape, standing behind you and donning the zipper of your dress. 
However, he stayed silent, showing it all with the reckless ministrations of his mouth as your chest blushed, your hands grabbed his hair almost painfully and your hips snapped, your mouth opening in a silent scream. 
You hadn't even bothered telling him you were cumming. He knew anyway. His mouth became more gentle, resolving to small licks while his fingers massaged your walls deep and slow, perfectly responding to the contractions of your muscles. "Here, pretty thing." He murmured, his hair tickling the skin of your stomach. "I've got you, baby. Shhh." He calmed you down, your breath coming in heavy pants, your heartbeat going like crazy. He rubbed his soaked fingers against his thigh, briefly cleaning himself before coming up to your face, cupping your cheeks. "Are you okay, little one?"
You nodded with your eyes closed, getting sleepy. 
He caressed your face. "Open your eyes for me, baby girl, let me see your pretty eyes." 
With a beatific smile you tried to look at him, eyelids lifting, taking a few seconds to focus on him. 
"There she is, my moonshine." He cooed, pressing a kiss to your lips. "You look really happy, baby thing."
You simply moved your head in a nod. 
"Do you want more, little fox?" He asked, still fussing over you. "Can you take it just one more time, babe?" 
Licking your lips you nodded again with a giggle. 
He smiled. "You keep nodding, baby. Are you saying yes to daddy?" 
"Yes, Joonie." You whispered slowly. 
"Good girl. Can you walk, Vixen?" 
"Yes."
"Great. I want you to kneel in front of the coffee table, darling." He commanded, rising to his feet and helping you stand up. 
This would be the last time, he decided. 
He would allow himself your heaven just one more time, then he would hold you close for a few minutes, clean you up, accompany you home and let you go. He wasn't man enough to look into your eyes. He was weak and unfair. He turned you around with your back to him, his erection brushing against the small of your back. Once you were in front of the table, he moved your hair to the side, skimming the curve of your ear with his lower lip. "Kneel, Vixen."
You did. 
He kneeled behind you, moving the books and magazines on the floor, away from the two of you, while the traces of your dinner were thrown into the bag, which he would discard later. With an empty table, he pushed his palm from the small of your back to your nape, making your front adhere to the table and making sure that your hair was out of the way. "I know you love this table." He murmured. 
"I do."
"I do, too." His heart felt like a burden. Without further hesitation, he grabbed his length and rubbed his tip against you. "You ready, ____?" 
"Please."
With a groan he slipped in, the filling sensation causing a loud whine on your behalf. "Quiet." He reprimanded. 
You got a little scared at his dark voice, knowing that at this point you'd better obey. However, it lasted little. Once he bottomed out, he growled, bending down to your neck. "You good, little one?" He said, his sweet persona back in place. 
"Yes, daddy."
He was breathing heavily through his nose as he sucked at the skin of your neck, marking you. As soon as he was sure the mark would bruise and stay for at least a couple days, he released your skin. "Do you want your spanks, baby girl?" 
Your eyes rolling with pleasure, you hummed. "I want them so much, daddy. Spank me, please."
He simply breathed. "With pleasure, little one." He knew no one would ever be this good to him. 
His chest parted from your back, a small shiver settling in instead. 
The first smack was harsh, angry. You clenched around him and he thrusted in violently, growling. 
The second one hit the tender skin of your outer thigh, where it met your ass. "Daddy." You whined. 
"Quiet." He chastised again, his voice strained. He hammered into you four or five times. 
"Daddy, it hurts." You cried out, at which he stayed silent, simply spanking you again, twice, without rubbing soothingly at your skin. You emitted a shrill huffing sound of complaint, at which he answered with violent ramming into you, using both hands to push you onto his lap. 
This was not how Joon usually did it. This was not normal. With worry distracting your mind, you turned your head, looking at him. His eyes were closed, droplets falling down his cheeks. Was it sweat or tears? 
"Namjoon?" You asked, alarmed. 
He shook his head, biting his lip. "You good?" He asked, eyes still closed. 
"Stop." You murmured. 
He obeyed, exiting your warmth and opening his eyes, still avoiding your gaze contact. "Did I—?"
"Look at me." 
He shook his head. "I can't." 
"Namjoon." You reprimanded. 
As your eyes met his, you noticed they were rimmed with tears, and he was biting his lip to hold back a sob, shaking his head in shame. 
Your initial shock was followed by an overwhelming sense of tenderness for the beautiful, delicate man in front of you. 
You quickly decided what to do. 
You turned around fully, facing him as you stood on your knees, your hands caressing his cheeks. "What is it, Joonie bear?" 
He simply frowned and hid in the crook of your neck, desperate. 
"What is it?" You asked again. 
He nuzzled even more into your chest, inhaling the damp feel of your skin. "I just want it to be a good memory." He huffed with a broken whisper. 
A memory? "Why would it be a memory, Namjoon?" You asked, confused. 
"If it's our last time, I wanna be good to you." He said, and you could feel every ounce of sadness in his voice. 
Last time? "Joonie bear, why would it be our last time?" 
His shoulders shook with sobs as he stopped holding back his tears. "I've been a bastard, it's okay if you want to go." He tried saying in his most composed voice.
You frowned in confusion. "No, Namjoon."
"You want to leave me. It's okay. I need it only one last time."
You shook your head, trying to grab his chin and make him look at you. However, he strongly opposed. 
"Joonie." You murmured, hugging his head and caressing his hair. "I'm not here to leave you." You whispered. "I want to be with you." You continued. 
He shook his head even more. "I was dumb. You have every right—" 
"No." You kissed his head, caressing his shoulders, hugging him tight. "I'm not going anywhere." 
He looked up at you, his face covered in tears. 
"Oh, baby bear." You cooed, touching his cheeks, kissing his forehead. "Don't cry, Joonie." He disappeared even more into you, hugging your entire figure, dwarfing you. "Don't cry, my love." You whispered, the word tiptoeing out of your lips. He sobbed harder. "I'm so in love with you, Joonie bear." You crooned, offering him all your soul in those simple, childish words. 
"You love me?" He asked, confused, alarmed, petrified. 
"I love you, Namjoon." You repeated. 
He completely forgot his messy face and brought his lips to yours, his mouth melting into you eagerly as your tongues spoke a language that came so natural to both of you. 
Breathless, he parted from you. "I love you. I love you so much." He pressed tens of kisses on your face with such speed and pressure that you felt like disappearing into him. 
"I love you too." You giggled, trying to clean his face. 
You both laughed, elated, his hands coming to your waist, holding you closer and closer. "I wanna make love to you." He whispered. "Let me love you."
"Missionary on the carpet or cowgirl on the sofa?" You asked. 
"Why choose when you can have both?" He wiggled an eyebrow. You smiled. He smiled back. "Let's get on the sofa." He replied gently. "You'll catch a cold with your sweaty back on the freezing floor."
"But no missionary on the sofa…" You cried out like a child. 
He smiled. "Do you want missionary so bad?" He kissed your temple, smiling. 
"I guess I'll be happy with anything you want." You pouted, still doubtful. 
"C'mere." He said, getting even closer. You slipped your stilettos off and he picked you up by the back of your thighs and with some strength you didn't know he had, he carried you to the sofa, careful not to step on your shoes. "I'm going to sit. Careful with your legs." He warned, plopping down as carefully and as gently as he could, mercifully avoiding to sit with your calves underneath him. 
"Don't worry, I won't make you ride me, baby." He kissed your brow. "You're too tired for that." He cradled you to his chest, offering you a bit of his body heat. "Can you push it inside you for me, love?" He asked seducingly, kissing your neck. 
You smiled and reached between your bodies. He was already pulsating, you knew he would come undone in a few strokes. Slowly, you lifted your hips and pushed his tip inside, making him groan. 
"You're always so tight, babylove. Fuck, you feel amazing." He sucked at your neck some more, drawing a twin bruise to the one you had on the other side of your throat. "I feel like a fucking teenager with you. I can never get enough." His hips jutted a little, pushing into you while his forearm around your waist pulled you down, his hand gripping your ass. 
"Daddy." You breathed out, your forehead pressed against his neck as he bottomed out. 
"Yes?" He replied, soothing you with long caresses down your spine. "Does it hurt, doll?" 
He had so many nicknames for you but you couldn't wait for your next. "No, daddy." He held your face away from his shoulder. "Are you sure babylove?" 
Your face stretched in a slight grimace. "Maybe."
He giggled and kissed your cheek, sliding down to your mouth. "I'm sorry, Vixen." He pressed his lips to yours once and then again. "I'm so sorry, baby. For everything." He combed your hair back. "I can't promise you I'll never hurt you, but I can promise I'll try to make it better every single time." He held you close as your brow furrowed. "I love you." He whispered, one hand cradling the back of your head, the other pressing on your lower back. 
"I love you too." You said right back. "But please, Joonie…" 
"Need me to move?" He asked.
"I want you to cum." You murmured. 
He smirked and nodded. "Want me to finger you?" He asked, already drawing short thrusts into you and helping you ride him with his forearm around you. 
"Yes, please, daddy." You whined.
His right hand left the crown of your head, coming to the top of your thighs and beginning to draw small circles at the apex of your labia, the flat of his thumb wide enough to cover your bundle of nerves entirely.
"Would you like to take your time, Vixen?" He asked kindly, knowing that sometimes it took you a bit longer than him to actually get worked up. 
"I just need you to keep going exactly like this. You're perfect, Joonie."
He grunted and started pushing into you from below. "Like this?" He said, his voice a tad strained. 
His thrusts were low and deep, curling just enough to hit your sweet spot. He realised you started holding your breath. Usually that meant you were close. 
He bent his head, looking down where your bodies joined. It was hypnotizing, his thumb drawing perfectly identical circles. He started kissing and licking any and every inch of skin that came close to his mouth, your shoulder, your chest, your neck, sucking whenever he managed to grip the skin for long enough to bruise and mark. 
When you started shoving yourself on him, bouncing in earnest, he kept his cool and stopped fooling around, staying focused on lasting long enough, doing the exact same thing, knowing that with a few thrusts delivered just right, you would become like putty in his arms and he could just get crazy and chase his high. 
With your lips parting in a high pitched moan, you pressed your hips to his two more times before your chest collapsed into his with a tired whimper. "Take what you need." You murmured before propping yourself with your forearms against the back of the sofa, lifting your hips. Your face was pressed at the crook beneath his jaw, your tongue blindly chasing the droplets of sweat sliding down the column of his throat. He emitted an animalistic groan before his palms thudded heavily against your glutes, gripping your hips so hard that both his knuckles and your flesh turned white. And then he started ramming into you from below. The sounds in the room were a mix of his grunts, the smacking of flesh and the wetness between your legs, but more quietly, under all those layers, in between a groan and the next, there were his whispered love declarations, which poured out of his mouth like prayers, until he was so close, so fucked out that he could only repeat 'I love you', over and over, interrupted only by a final howl as he spilled inside you. 
In all of this you had tried to stay quiet, shushing him and kissing his neck, not sure that you were allowed to mark him. 
You laid both exhausted, his body sliding sideways down the sofa, trying to rest on the seats, his head laying on an armrest as his ankles dangling from the other. You covered him like a blanket, your hair draping over his chest and tumbling down the edge of the sofa. 
You were both sweaty and messy with cum and drool, still you simply laid there, until you felt too cold and shivered. 
"Blanket?" You asked. 
He shook his head. "I'd better dress you and take you back at mine. I can go home tonight. There's no use working late. I need to rest anyway."
"Are you sure." You asked, touching his face. 
He kissed your wrist. "Sure."
"I have to clean your chair first. I should have some wet wipes in my handbag." You mumbled. "And I should clean myself too before I drip on your lovely sofa."
He hummed, tired, fake-crying as he said "I don't wanna get up."
"My bag is right beside the sofa, just stretch your arm backward." You directed him. 
He fumbled around a bit, moving the bag from behind his head to your side, where you could easily reach inside. After a bit of rummaging, you fished out your wipes, making a quick work of pulling him out and cleaning yourself. 
"Cold." He muttered with a pout, which you kissed away from his face. 
"Come on, baby bear, get up and get dressed. I wanna shower with you and shower you in kisses." You pampered him, trying to convince him to get ready to leave. 
He whined as you sat up, quickly dashing to recoup your underwear. Once you were wearing it, you cleaned his chair, quite happy when you noticed that it wasn't half as bad as you though. When you turned, you noticed he was staring at you, already completely dressed, your dress in his hands. You moved closer.
"Up with your arms, love." He said gently, and for a second you realised that your simple and emotional confessions weren't a mirage caused by arousal or desperation. 
You followed his instructions as he helped you wear your dress, slipping it over your head and helping you find both sleeves. Next he gripped the hem at both sides, delicately rolling the fabric down your body. Once it reached your knees, he let his hands skim back up your hips and waist, crossing his wrists behind your back before squeezing your ass. He stared at your throat. 
"Will I have to wear a turtleneck for the next ten days?" You asked, slipping the neck of your dress aside and checking the damage. 
"Sorry." He murmured. 
"It's okay. I like it. I'm just teasing you." You said with a playful smirk. 
"Brat." He mouthed with a snicker, bending down to pick up your tights. 
You tutted, stealing them from his hands. "Let me do these, they're tricky."
He simply stared, his body trembling with a new tide of arousal at the mannerism you used to put on the garment, rolling up one leg between your thumbs and forefingers, pressing your toes against the stitching and dragging the nylon up your leg. He had seen this scene in an old Italian movie, but seeing the gesture in real life helped him understand the frenzy that the main character experienced after such an act. After you repeated the movement on the other leg, his mouth practically salivating, he watched some more as you fixed the gusset and the waistband, stretching the garment around the curve of your ass. 
"Call me whenever you need to wear those." He whispered in marvel and agony. "I might take them off you just to see it all over again."
You smiled coquettishly, grabbing your coat and wearing it. 
He kneeled in front of you, holding one of your shoes. "When's your birthday?" He asked, making you lift one foot as he slipped your heel on. 
You frowned, the connection unknown to you. "Mid-november. Why?" 
He held your other shoe and you held onto his shoulder as you lifted your other foot, wearing the black stiletto. "I loved seeing those on you tonight. I might buy you another pair or eight as a birthday gift."
You shook your head and laughed. "I don't need a sugar daddy, I'm happy with my plain, regular one." He rose to his feet and you grabbed his cheeks, planting a big, fat smooch on his mouth. "I'm actually very, very in love."
"Hello, Actually Very, Very in Love. My name is Head Over Heels — he pointed at your shoes — in Love. Pleased to meet you."
You laughed and he felt his heart explode with joy, his nose brushing against yours with Eskimo kisses. "Your bag." He said, bending to pick it up. "My bags." He said, collecting his tote and the small paper bag with his belongings that you had brought him. He neared his desk, checking the various devices. "Equipment off, computer off–" He mumbled as he moved the mouse to shut down the system. Meanwhile you fixed the low table, putting the magazines back on top of it. He switched off his table lamp and moved towards the door. "Dinner." He reminded himself, picking up the trash bag by the entrance. "You ready, Vixen?" 
You hummed in confirmation. 
"Let's go." 
259 notes · View notes
aurora077 · 3 years ago
Text
The Value of Recognition - Chapter 3
Chapter 3 - Well shit
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13934252/1/The-Value-of-Recognition
“Wei-qianbei, are you okay?” asked Lan Sizhui. Healer Zhang had been quietly filling in Second in Command Pan about what they knew so far, but the juniors had been focused on their Senior Wei and the adorable child who they couldn’t believe was actually the irascible Sect Leader Jiang. As such, they noticed when the mood on that side of the table dropped.
One minute everything was fine and he was enjoying the food and the next, Wei Wuxian’s chicken had slipped out of his chopsticks, Jingyi style, and had (luckily) landed on his bowl of rice without him noticing a thing. He’d fallen silent and seemed to be far away. None of them knew why he was reacting this way to the toddler’s innocent words.
“Who’s A-Ying?” Ouyang Zizhen whispered to Lan Jingyi.
“Beats me…”
But he remembered something and it seemed to click. “Wait.. Do you think... that it’s Wei-qianbei?” Jingyi replied, thinking of all the Wei Yings Hanguang-Jun had said since his return.
“Young Master Jiang,” said Jin Ling, also concerned about Wei Wuxian’s reaction and as straightforward as his uncle he asked, “Who is A-Ying?”
“A-Ying is A-Ying,” he chirped, “Wei-shufu said A-Ying will be fwens with A-Cheng, like A-die and Wei-shufu. But he didn’t bwing A-Ying.”
Jin Ling seemed like he’d caught on. He looked between his xiao jiujiu and Wei Wuxian with a mix of pity and sorrow.
Wei Wuxian had noticed none of this. His head was filled with white noise. Wei Changze. When did Jiang Cheng meet Wei Changze? Jiang Cheng never mentioned meeting his parents. And he himself didn’t remember ever being to Lotus Pier before Jiang Fengmian found him (though granted he did have a shitty memory). Mini Jiang Cheng said his Wei-shufu promised to bring A-Ying to play with him. Was that… Did it never happen because his parents...didn’t make it back?? Was three year old Jiang Cheng’s memory of Wei Changze the last time he ever set foot in Lotus Pier? Grief held his heart like a vice at the thought.
Wei Wuxian did not remember how long he was on the streets. He vaguely remembered being around five in the only memory he has of them that remained clear. Him, getting a little too big to ride on his father’s shoulders, but his father humoring him anyway. His mother was laughing and happy, sitting on a donkey and looking at them fondly.
His years on the street blurred together. All he knew was that his parents were on a night hunt and when they were done they would come and get him. But he waited and waited and nobody came. Eventually the food they had left him had run out and he had gotten hungry and wandered away from their camp (and later, couldn’t find his way back). He’d had to fight other children, even adults, for little scraps of food and the best places to find shelter for the next few years. And of course, the worst thing to happen to him was those feral street dogs who would chase him and bite him, especially if he’d managed to scrounge up any little food from the stuff people threw out.
(“Senior Wei.”)
When Jiang Fengmian had found him and taken him home, he was amazed at the beauty and splendor of Lotus Pier. To a nine-year old who’d been on the streets for years, he had never seen such a sight. If he had been there before, he would have surely remembered it! He could only conclude that he hadn’t gotten the chance to visit Lotus Pier. He didn’t recognise Jiang Cheng when he met him as a child and Jiang Fengmian had only said that this would be his home now. He hadn’t asked him if he remembered him or Lotus Pier.
Wei Wuxian hadn’t gone with Jiang Fengmian because he knew him, he had gone because the man said he knew his parents and had offered him food and shelter. By then, he was old enough to know that his parents were never coming back.
My god, his parents. When was the last time he thought about his parents? He’d told Jiang Cheng to leave the past in the past. The bitterness and the pain. He’d wanted them both to move forward and live happily. But now he was staring the past in the face, forced to confront things he had buried. Things he hadn’t even known he’d buried.
(“Master Wei?” “What’s going on with him?”)
Jiang Fengmian had rarely actually talked to him about his parents aside from the time he’d found him and told him they were his friends. He’d doted on him and treated him like he was his own son (unlike his actual son who’d gotten treated coldly many times, causing an argument between Jiang Fengmian and Yu Ziyuan every time without fail…).
It made Wei Wuxian feel terrible. He was happy that Uncle Jiang liked him and treated him well, but it felt really horrible to be the reason why Jiang Cheng’s face fell every time Wei Ying was praised and he wasn’t. He’d loved his grumpy shidi and causing him pain was the last thing he’d ever wanted to do. (Though he’d managed to do it time and time again.) But he’d meant it that day when he’d told Jiang Cheng that he didn’t want people assigning him to other households. His parents had been real people in this world. It was funny that now, it was Jiang Cheng who had to remind him of that, albeit unknowingly.
When was the last time he’d thought about his parents?
He choked back a sob.
(“Wei Wuxian!” “What is happening right now, is he okay?”)
How did he never know that he looked like his father? Who was left alive that knew his parents? Lan Qiren? (A man who disliked his mother... and hated him.)
Who was left to talk about them and honor their memory? Wei Wuxian had been so young and his memory was poor. He hardly remembered them at all. Why did nobody ever tell him he looked so much like his dad that a toddler, who surely couldn’t have interacted that much with the man, could recognise him in Wei Wuxian’s face to the point he’d thought it was him?
(“Senior Wei, can you hear me?”)
Wei Wuxian, in his obliviousness, had not even realised that was the case. Because he hadn’t known. Oh he’d heard about his mother. How she came down from Baoshan Sanren’s mountain, how she’d been so much like him. How Jiang Fengmian had loved her but she chose his father anyway. Just like Cangse Sanren, is what people said about him, once upon a time that is. Rarely anyone mentioned his father. And now, nobody mentioned them at all. Because nobody (save the uptight Lan Qiren) could even remember them. They were like footnotes in the grand scheme of his life.
His parents were footnotes in his life. He hadn’t intended to do it, but it seemed like they were part of the past he’d left behind when he told his shidi to leave it there.
He felt like weeping.
And indeed he must be, because the sound of it reached his ears. He reached a hand up to wipe his tears but.. his face was dry?
He felt a tug on his sleeve.
“Wei-shufu, A-Cheng is sorry.”
His vision cleared. Oh. He was surrounded by worried faces and a now teary-eyed baby, whose cries were a lot more silent than before but also a lot more sorrowful now.
“Wei-shufu don’t leave A-Cheng. A-Cheng will be good,” he cried, “Pwease don’t tell A-die A-Cheng was bad. A-Cheng won’t ask for A-Ying.”
Tears silently slid down the toddler’s face, and that was the impetus for his to fall too. He picked up the toddler and cuddled him, hiding his own teary face from the others in the child’s hair.
“Who said A-Cheng was bad? Was it the scary geges?” (“Hey!” protested Lan Jingyi.)
He stroked the child’s head consolingly, trying to control his own sorrow. He didn’t know what expression he had on his face when being struck with the past, but he hadn’t meant for the child to think he was to blame.
“A-Cheng didn’t do anything wrong. Wei-shufu was just missing his family.”
(Lan Sizhui gasped. It seemed like he too realised what was going on. He shared a look with Jin Ling. Wen Ning too had realised what was happening, and if a corpse could have cried, he would be sobbing on his friend’s behalf.)
“W..wei-shufu c..can *hic* bwing them to ‘otus Pier too,” said Xiao Cheng, sniffling.
Oh that precious little thing. “Maybe next time,” he deflected, “This time your Uncle Wei is here for you.”
He patted the child’s back. “Don’t cry now, come on, let’s finish your breakfast okay?” A-Cheng nodded. But he was quiet and let Wei Wuxian feed him the rest of his meal. Everyone else was subdued as well, each thinking that those two people never seemed to be able to escape an encounter with each other unscathed.
------
With the awkward breakfast over, Wei Wuxian had pushed his emotions aside; he’d reflect on those another time. Right now it was time to get down to business.
“Second in Command Pan, can I call you Senior Pan? That’s a bit of a mouthful isn’t it?” he quipped.
Pan An huffed but acquiesced.
“Okay so Senior Pan, Healer Zhang has briefed you already on what we know. With your sect leader currently… indisposed… Lotus Pier of course will be your responsibility and I beg your leave to help and to use the library etc as needed. It falls to you to grant us permission to stay but if we have it I promise I’m going to do everything in my power to make this right. A-Ling has a sect to run as well so the both of you can’t do everything alone. It’s going to be difficult enough to contain the news of what happened. People talk and lots of people would have seen Wen Ning bringing him in last night. The Lans have a song called Inquiry which I’m sure you’ve heard of. Lan Sizhui is proficient enough and I thought we could start our investigation by communicating with the spirit to find out what exactly it cast.”
“I admit Master Wei, I’m not pleased to have to accept your help for this. But yes you have my permission to do what it takes to break this curse, even though Sect Leader might break my legs when he... comes back,” said long suffering second in command Pan. “Why would A-Die bweak gege’s legs?” asked A-Cheng innocently. Crap.
“Uh your A-Die isn’t going to break anyone’s legs, A-Cheng,” Wei Wuxian laughed sheepishly. “Gege was just joking,” said a panicked Pan An.
Healer Zhang facepalmed. “Young Master Jiang, may I make a suggestion?” she said earnestly, seemingly invested in going along with the idea that he was in charge while his father was away. She had not, however, forgotten for a moment that this child was in fact her sect leader. He was responsible to a tee and would take Wei Wuxian’s words about being in charge to heart, even as a toddler. But he was also a child at the moment and there are some things you just don’t discuss in front of a child. Especially when it was about him. He would hear his name come up and wonder what he had done and how would they explain things to him then?
He hesitated but nodded.
“Why don’t you and your Flower-gege go with Flower-gege’s friends to do a patrol of the sect? Your Uncle Wei, Sizhui-ge, and Second-In-Command Pan have some boring adult things to talk about.”
Mini Jiang Cheng looked up at his Flower-gege who smiled encouragingly. “Okay,” he said softly, wanting to do his best while his family were away. He already messed up and made Wei-shufu sad. Maybe A-Die would give him a hug if he did a good job and didn’t cause any more trouble..
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fuckyouquiznak · 4 years ago
Text
Jschlatt's Return
= Future developments in the Dream SMP plot (theories)
How does resurrection work?
• According to Philza and Eret to revive someone his ghost must be killed in the same way he lost his last canon life (that would also explain why Glatt and Ghostbur came back online recently).
• We also know they may need a totem and the knowledge of the resurrection book, which is now kept somewhere out there in the server, considering Dream said he didn't have it physically in prison with him. (He also said he destroyed it, but do we trust him? Absolutely not)
• We didn't see Tommy's revival from Dream's point of view, so it could be that Phantommy actually appeared and Dream easily killed him on the same spot of Tommy (maybe using the clock or his mask as a totem idk), but we still don't know what kind of information the book provides and how resurrection really works.
What is going to happen?
1. Quackity and Sam
• Quackity's last stream made pretty clear Big Q's intention of taking the book from Dream using all the means possible.
• However, despite the torture, Dream won't give any information. First of all he doesn't like Jschlatt, because he finds him annoying and boring (not like Wilbur) and second, of course, he knows the book's knowledge is the only thing that prevents other people from killing him. And then again, why should he give away the same power that made him a god? Quackity won't kill him without the book, and he is used to pain. Moreover he'll have some company at least.
• Quackity won't give up. He will keep visiting Dream everyday and will eventually start to like making him suffer.
• Sam instead will feel more and more guilty for what he made possible and for the person he became. He has changed since Tommy's death. He had promise to protect him and then he failed him. And then everything went wrong. He likes to believe that Dream deserves this for what he did to Tommy, but he is not sure that's the right way. Sometimes he even feels sorry for him, especially after Quackity's visits. After all Dream is just a broken person. Isn't he?
2. Tommy and the boys
• Meanwhile Tommy goes to Puffy's therapy sessions and opens up about his traumas and fears. It's hard, but it really helps having someone to talk to. Especially now.
• Since he returned to the server he has felt so lonely.
• Everyone treats him differently. Some people see him as miracle and keep asking inappropriate questions. Some others pretend nothing happened. For few of them the server just moved on; for others he is still dead.
• Even so he can't focus too much on himself right now. Stopping Dream is much more important. If Wilbur comes back... he doesn't even want to think about what he is capable of.
• They need to kill Dream, but Tommy is still too scared to come back to prison or to even touch a sword. Every time he suffers a damage he can't breathe: it's like it's happening all over again.
• He can't stay at his house anymore, on the ashes of L'Manburg, nor at his hotel, which is in Jack's hands, and he doesn't want to be alone (it reminds him of exile).
• He'll pass the time at Ranboo and Tubbo's, meeting Michael and working out a plan to kill Dream.
• In Tommy's stream Tubbo showed him his investigation report, pointing out that both Foolish and Ranboo were online when someone damaged the prison (before Tommy's dead).
• Tubbo obviously blames Foolish, nonetheless Tommy understands that something in Ranboo is corrupted.
• He tries to warn Tubbo, who underestimates his friend's words, thinking he might just be jealous of their relationship. They fight. It's a huge argument.
• "It's like you don't want me to be happy" Tubbo screams, shaking his head.
• "I don't want you to be happy without me" as soon as these words leave Tommy's mouth he immediately regrets it.
• Tubbo stays silent for a while. He seems disappointed: "You've changed".
• Tommy tighten a fist. "That's what death does to people, Tubbo, it changes them".
3. Kinoko Kingdom
• At the end Tommy will leave Snowchester and will move into Kinoko Kingdom (he liked the sign of the "free stuff", so why not?). Tommy there is welcome.
• He explains the Wilbur situation to the others, but then something bad happens.
• Hanging out with Sapnap, they talk about Ranboo and Dream's friendship and about how he acted when he received the ":)" message.
• It turns out Ranboo is guilty for the explosions in the prison that kept Sam busy during Tommy's visit to Dream.
• Tommy shows Tubbo the evidences.
4. Platonic Divorce
• After that, the platonic husbands will go through a "divorce arc".
• "How could you?" Tubbo can't help crying and screaming. "I trusted you".
• Ranboo wishes he could do something. But he is scared. He doesn't remember any of that. Did he really help Dream? Why? He doesn't...
• "I kicked out Tommy, my best friend, when he most needed me because of you! I think you should leave".
• Tubbo goes back to Tommy, apologizing. "You were right". And as much as he hates Ranboo, Tommy is broken-hearted seeing his best friend that hurt.
• However he can't help smiling when Tubbo says: "Guess it's just you and me against Dream like it has always been". It's selfish, but he really missed his best friend.
5. Connor's betrayal
• Sam talks with Connor about his doubts related to the all 'torture thing'.
• Connor tries to comfort him and decides to visit Dream with Quackity.
• Dream is relentless: "That villain arc you sewed for yourself is nice. But I won't tell you anything. And the book doesn't exist anymore, now. You can control every book in the server. It will not bring it back" saying these words Dream keeps his eyes on Connor. "The only way to find it should be... be able to travel in time"
• Connor freezes.
6. Karl's arrest
• Karl finds the resurrection book during one of his travels.
• He immediately plans to give it to Tommy, but when he comes back, someone is waiting for him in the library.
• "Well, look what the cat dragged in" Quackity stays still, his arms crossed, next to Connor and Sam. They all wear armours. "So it is true. That's a huge secret you have, Karl"
• The library behind them is destroyed. Books lie on floor ripped. They were looking for it.
• Karl puts the book of Necromancy back, his voice shaking as he realises Sapnap and George aren't there. "What are you doing here?" He asks, making eye contact with Connor, who quickly looks away, ashamed.
• "I'm sorry, Karl" he whispers "But Jschlatt is my friend"
• Quackity walks slowly towards him. "Give me the book, Karl". He has a creepy smile on his face. Is that even the same Quackity? This one looks different.
• "Quackity, you don't have to-"
• "Don't tell what I have to do. If you refuse, I might have to declare you under arrest"
• Karl holds the book tighter. If he gave him the book... no, he can't do that. For Tommy's sake, and for the rest of the server. If the book has the power to revive Wilbur... it must be destroyed. He grabs his sword, ready to fight.
• Quackity looks disappointed "You didn't give me another choice, man" he says, before killing him and taking the book from his inventory.
7. Dream and Karl
• Karl is later taken to the prison and put in Dream's cell.
• "Well, green boy, seems like you service is no longer required. However, I want to keep having fun with you. I'll revive Jschlatt, and then I'll execute you publicly. Enjoy your last hours: I got you company" Quackity leaves with a victory smile on his face.
• Dream looks horrible. He is covered in blood, his body painted by new scars. Karl has never seen him like this. His hearts are low and he hasn't eaten in days.
• Dream is the first one who speaks: "You found it".
• Karl freezes. What does that mean? "I though I had hidden it too well" he keeps saying, washing his blood away. "Maybe I should have really destroyed it"
• How cool would it be if Dream actually hid the book in the timeline? He couldn't burn it. Otherwise if he died no one would have revived him. So he just hid it where only Karl could find it.
• So yes, Dream knows Karl's power because he has a similar one. And yes, the prison was actually built for Karl (that's the only theory I care about).
• "We are not that different, Karl. Forgetting the people you love.. I know what it feels. I can help you controlling it. Have you reached the In between yet?"
• What if Dream is the one leaving Karl books and suggestions about his travels?
• They spend some time together and they surprisingly get along well. It's like someone finally understands.
8. Sapnap's lore
• Sapnap finds out Karl has been arrested, but he doesn't know why. He is angry.
• He faces Quackity who giggles. "Apparently there are a lot of things we don't know about Karl" but he doesn't tell him Karl's secret.
• Quackity and Sapnap break up (I won't ever be over Quackity's stream with El Rapid)
• Sapnap joins the children group. They are breaking into prison, right? He needs to save Karl.
9. Escape from Pandora's Vault
• Tommy, Tubbo, Ghostbur and Sapnap manage to break into Pandora's Vault when Sam and Quackity aren't online.
• When they arrive in Dream's cell, he is talking with Karl.
• Sapnap, horrified, takes Karl away from him. He doesn't trust Dream anymore, not after what he did to Tommy. He is sure it's his fault if Karl is here now.
• Dream can't help smiling when he sees the little party there. Especially when he sees his best friend Tommy. He tries to get closer.
• "I'm gonna kill you man. What the hell-" Sapnap punches Dream away. The anger and the resentment spread all over his body. They didn't deserve so much pain. Maybe the server will be a peaceful place without him. "You killed Tommy and then you gave Quackity the book- you"
• Karl stops him, defending Dream. "Sapnap, please. He didn't give them the book. I was the one who did".
• Everyone hold their breathe. What? Why? Wasn't it burned? How did you...
• "We need to get him out"
• Tommy grifts his teeth: "No way he is coming with us". He tries to grab his sword trembling and gagging, but it's too much. He can't... that place...
• Dream steps away. "Oh, you came to kill me" he whispers. "Do it. I'll be dead by tomorrow anyway"
• "You can't die yet!" Karl screams.
• "C'mon, Karl-"
• Dream smiles. "Don't forget who you are, Karl. And don't stray from the path. The SMP needs you more than you know" (= Dream is the one who leaves Karl notes about time travelling in the In Between :])
• "We don't have much time, guys"
• "Yeah, Tommy you don't have much time. Are you going to kill me? Or are you too afraid?" Dream starts teasing Tommy. "I bet you can't do it, right? You're too weak. And down deep you know you love me. We are best friends after all, aren't we?"
• Tommy doesn't react. He is as pale as a ghost, his eyes wide open.
• Tubbo steps in. He can't look at Tommy like this. He hates Dream so much. "Stay away from him". Looking back at his life, Dream has always been responsible for the bad things happened to him. The discs, L'Manburg, Tommy's exile, his death...
• Dream raises his eyebrows. "Tubbo, how's Ranboo?"
• It happens in a moment. Tubbo just loses control and kills Dream. Don't worry Dream's stans he'll come back one day. Bigger plans for that greenboy.
10. Resurrection
• They all run away.
• That same night Jschlatt is publicly revived. "¿Por dónde empezamos?"
• Quackity, Sam and Connor stay behind him.
• "Tonight our country has faced a loss. Four intruders entered the Pandora's Vault, killed Dream and helped the prisoner Karl Jacobs escape. Sapnap, Tubbo, Tommy and Ghostbur are now officially wanted. Dead or alive."
End of the season? Maybe?
How does the server react?
• Tommy, Tubbo, Sapnap, Ghostbur and Karl are criminals. They become nomads for a while. Samnook gives them an hand.
• Tommy keeps thinking about what Tubbo did. They really didn't talk about it after the break-out. Tubbo just pretends nothing happened.
• Karl and Sapnap aren't talking neither. And when they do they fight.
• The only happy one seems to be Ghostbur, who is excited to be on a vacation with the boys.
• Dream's ghost (Specdream? Nightmare?) appears to Ranboo, who is alone in a self-exile because he doesn't want to hurt anyone. Dream's ghost would be much more like Clay, so he won't be that dangerous like c/Dream (cfr. Ghostbur and Wilbur). But still it would be insane to see those two hanging out.
• Jschlatt and Quackity open their Casino, helped by Jack, who sells the hotel.
• After Dream's death and the destruction of Kinoko Kingdom, George takes Quackity's side. He is sure Sapnap killed Dream and he doesn't know how to feel about it...
• Philza, Techno, Eret and Niki, wanting Wilbur's return, will do the same (they need Ghostbur btw). Techno in particular will hunt the fugitives.
• Puffy and Fundy, contrary to them, will try to find Ranboo and the others in order to stop Jschlatt and Quackity.
• Wilbur and Dream meanwhile are having so much fun in the afterlife.
Even if solitaire is not chess
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boebluewrites555 · 3 years ago
Text
From dusk till dawn Chapter One
(A Xabrielle uber fanfic)
It had all happened by chance one day when Xena had decided to give a coffee shop along her usual patrol route a chance at redemption. It wasn’t until later down the track when she would realise that nothing ever truly happened by chance, somehow it was always fate that intervened, and thank the gods for that! 
She had only been their once before, but it hadn’t taken long to convince her that it was far better than her usual haunt and it wasn’t just the better than last time coffee that had her hooked, it was far more to do with the view.
The beach was always pleasant to look at and it sure beat staring at the parking lot her old haunt had so drearily looked out upon.
Though most of her colleagues might have thought that Xena was not the kind of person who’d get all sappy about that kind of stuff, they had no idea just how ‘sappy’ she could be. Especially lately when she had admittedly become rather desperate. Of course, she didn’t mind being alone she pretty much always had been after all. It was more to do with the strange feeling she had always had in the pit of her stomach. A sort of yearning feeling that seemed to tell her that something was just…. missing in her life. But she could never quite put her hand on what exactly that missing thing was. So, she tried to fill the void, with anything she could use to take her mind away. Whether it was putting everything into training and work until she couldn’t move another muscle, or even having sex with some random person she had met at a bar after work, it didn’t matter what it was…as long as it did the trick.
But no matter how hard she tried, straight after she had done those things the feeling of emptiness had always seamed to creep back over her shoulder. It just wasn’t the sort of thing that she could fight off with kicks and blows, or even her gun and Xena was beginning to think that it might never fade, until one-day when for the first time since she could remember, it had.
In fact it was that very day when she had been looking out at the beach, sipping her scolding hot drink. She was following a sea gull with her eyes as it had glided over to the waves and gracefully landed upon them when out of the corner of her eye something else drew her attention. It was the movement of a person that had caught her eye, and although Xena wasn’t usually too interested in other human’s antics, she couldn’t help but to keep her eyes on this one because something about them just drew her in.
The girl on the beach was dancing. She was wearing a bikini with an orangy-pink sarong tied around her waist. She was the most graceful person Xena had ever seen, and yet something about her dancing seamed full of emotion and almost, sad. Xena couldn’t help but to think that this woman could easily be dancing for a crowd with those moves, and she had to wonder why she wasn’t.
Xena had felt drawn to the girl, almost like she was pulling her in with her fluid like moves and Xena was raptured. She had wanted to walk over to the girl and introduce herself, ask why she was dancing so early in the morning instead of later where she would draw a crowd…. But for once Xena was scared. Scared that the women might not like her, or that Xena herself wouldn’t be good enough to even be considered by her beautiful self.
Xena had a past, that much was certain, though she had always tried not to think about it it had followed her wherever she went. When she was younger her father had walked out on her and her mum and her mother had become a drug addicted alcoholic. She was constantly bringing nasty men home and Xena had had to grow up rather quickly. She had been able to fight since she was small, instead of dancing and singing like a lot of other young girls did, she had kicked and practiced her punches on a punching bag, it had just come naturally to her for some reason, and it sure came in handy when the men her mother had brought home had tried to hurt her.
Her mother got worse and worse until one-day Xena had come home when she was just fifteen years old to find her conked out on the couch like usual. At first, she had thought that she had just drunken too much again, but it was only later when she had realised that one of those despicable men had given her too much of the drug they were having and left her for dead. When the ambulance had come, they had told Xena that she had been dead hours before.
After that Xena had gotten into the wrong kind of crowd, the criminal kind that got her into the kind of business that hurt others and stole things. She had stayed with that crowd for a long time, until when she was in her early twenties, she had been caught on one of her jobs, and though she could have easily escaped the cop who had got her instead had decided to let her go, on one condition though. She had made Xena promise that she would come alone to the career camp they ran for struggling young people where they taught them everything about being a cop and afterwards, if they wanted it, offered them a job.
Xena wouldn’t have kept her promise if it wasn’t for her determination to always keep her word when she gave it. She after all had been promised many things before by many people, and had experienced what it was like to have a promise broken over and over again, so although she had gone to some very dark places and done some truly horrible things…..she always kept her word.
So she did go, and after that she went again, and the next day she also showed up. Because Xena kept her word. Through out that time the cop who had made her promise to go had become a mother figure for Xena, she had believed in her and shown her more kindness than anyone ever had. It was that belief in her, the belief that she could change that got Xena to open up to her about her past. Cyrene had listened to her without interruption and afterwards Cyrene had cried. Xena had loved her ever since and had made sure that she accepted the job she was offered, and she put her everything into it out of gratefulness to her.
Xena had also vowed that day never to do the bad things she used to do again. Cyrene had told her that her efforts to not think about her past and to get out her anger and sadness would be better served by helping to take drugs off of the streets so that kids like her could be saved, and fighting the kinds of people that where like her dad, the sort of people who hurt others. Her skills where better served helping than they where hurting. Xena really began to understand that in Cyrene’s care and now, she wasn’t even close to the person she had used to be.
In fact, she felt terrible about what she had done in her past every single day and although Cyrene had told her that she could forgive herself now that she was helping others to repent for her sins, Xena knew that forgiving herself would never be on the cards.
Xena hadn’t even realised it but while she had been watching the beautifully alluring dancer gracefully move on the beach, for the first time in a long time that empty feeling she always seamed to feel had left her. It was actually as if it had never been there, and Xena was surprised to say the least. Usually, the only thing that stopped that feeling was destructive behaviour on her part, but here was something good, something pure, bright and beautiful that had done it, and it left Xena absolutely breathless.
The one thing that she knew for sure was she had to make visiting that coffee shop a regular thing.
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heytherejulietx · 4 years ago
Text
Haunted ~ Jughead Jones
Masterlists
Requests are OPEN
Notes - Hi so I’m seriously proud of this fic, and even though I feel like all of my Riverdale fics flop I’m super happy with this, so if you could reblog this and get it more reach that’s be amazing. (Also, on a note not related to this, I am working on the requests and I’m so sorry about the wait for them, but I was having trouble writing them so that’s why I wrote this fic. Sorry everyone they’re coming soon!)
Warnings - Pure angst and hurt. Be warned.
Word count - 5.6k.
Riverdale tag list - @idont-knowrn
If you’d like to be added to any tag list please just tell me!
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You and I walk a fragile line
I have known it all this time
But I never thought I'd live to see it break
~
Everything changed when Jughead moved to the South Side. Of course, she couldn't blame him for moving, she knew he had to. With his dad behind bars for a murder he didn't even commit and not being able to stay at the Andrews household any longer, he didn't have a choice in moving. Living in his dad's trailer was better than staying with a foster family whom he didn't know, though living on opposite sides of town and now attending different schools meant they saw less and less of each other. And to be completely honest, Y/N missed him so much. She missed having him stay over at her house before school since her house wasn't far from Archie's. She missed waking up with him in the mornings, being greeted with lazy kisses and warm hugs. She missed sitting with him in class, helping him in math and getting his help in English literature. She missed after school dates at Pop's; sharing each other's milkshakes and helping him write his novel.
But once he'd moved, the cracks in their relationship started to appear. At first it was just missed phone calls and being left on read, though soon it developed to frequent arguments, being stood up on dates for the Serpents, and just not seeing each other much anymore. It hurt her, because she missed her once perfect boyfriend, who was now so caught up with his new school and his imprisoned father's gang to give any sort of time or attention to her. Maybe it was selfish, but Y/N wanted him to focus on her, and not anybody else, even if just for one night. She could tell that their relationship was headed downhill, though she thought that it would be fixable. They had been through so much already, surely this wouldn't break them apart, right?
~
It's getting dark and it's all too quiet
And I can't trust anything now
And it's comin' over you like it's all a big mistake
~
Y/N frowned down at the Pop's menu sat on the table in front of her, scowling at the small printed words there. This was the third time he'd missed one of their dates, or just forgotten about it all together. She was guessing it was the latter, as Jughead had been too wrapped up in the Serpents and with Toni Topaz to think of anything else. She was certain that he was getting bored of her, or tired of her company. He was hanging around with a gang now, his people, so surely his plain old north-side girlfriend was getting tiresome? She took a glance out of the window beside her seat, seeing that the sky was darkening into evening - dark oranges and blues swirled together as the sun went down like an artist mixing paint on a canvas. When she'd gotten to Pop's it was still daylight, but he had taken so long to show that now it was getting dark.
Before she knew it, disappointed tears were brimming in her eyes, and a lump was forming in her throat. Why couldn't he just spare a few hours to go and see her? At first, she had given him the time he quite clearly needed, and the benefit of the doubt. He had just moved and he was adjusting, and she got that, but now it had been weeks and there was still no effort put in from his end. It wasn't like he was even a proper member of the Serpents, so she just didn't get it. 
After another few minutes she had paid for the one milkshake she had drank and the one that had been left sitting on the table untouched, that was meant for Jughead, and then left the diner. It was cold outside, the kind of cold that seeped through your clothes and gave you goosebumps. Though she already felt the cold disappointment that had been sticking with her for weeks, now. On the colder days before Jughead had moved, he would give her his denim jacket as they walked to Pop's after school, but just the thought of that now made her want to start crying. She couldn't remember the last time she had been wrapped in his jacket, or even his arms for that matter.
Before she knew what she was doing, Y/N had pulled her phone out and called him, anger washing over her and replacing the sadness she felt. He picked up after six rings. Usually it would only take one.
"Y/N?" He asked, no 'love' or 'baby'. "Can I call you back later? I'm with the Serpents."
"Couldn't you have spared one night from the Serpents to show up to our date?" She scoffed, lifting her free hand to wipe her eyes which were now streaming with tears. 
"What?" Jughead asked, sounding confused. "We didn't have a date today."
"Yes we did." Y/N sniffled, her lip quivering when realising he'd forgotten. "This is the third one you've missed for Christ's sake, Jug. I shouldn't trust anything you even say, anymore."
"I'm sorry I've been busy." He huffed, sounding more irritated than anything.
"Yeah, you're always busy now." She swallowed back the lump forming in her throat. "Too busy to come and see your girlfriend anymore."
"Y/N, come on-" 
Before he could say anymore she cut the call off, not ready to hear it. Once her phone was back in her pocket she covered her mouth with her hands as she started crying, her chest heaving with each choked sob that passed her lips. Soon it hurt, though nothing hurt as bad as the sadness consuming her from realising he didn't love her like he used to.
~
Holding my breath, won't lose you again
Something's made your eyes go cold
~
It was almost midnight when Y/N heard the rumble of a motorbike turning into her street corner, before she heard the noise cut off right outside her house. It wasn't unusual for Jughead to come and see her after a fight, though it was unusual for them to fight so often. The most they had ever argued before the move was when his father had first been arrested, but she understood that he was just so stressed with everything that he was lashing out at people. Though this was different.
Y/N hadn't moved from her bed since she had gotten home. She hadn't even changed out of her clothes, she had just gotten into her bed and cried. She was still crying by the time she heard her window being pushed open further and someone stepping into her room. Y/N had the covers over her head so she couldn't see him approaching, though she felt the bed dip when he sat down beside her, and felt his hand rubbing her back through the covers. She sat up just enough to turn and move her arms around him, pressing her face into his chest as she started crying again, holding onto him tightly.
"I'm sorry." She heard him whisper into her hair as he wrapped his arms around her shaking body, which only made her cry harder. Did he really mean that? She couldn't be sure.
"Do- do you still love me?" Y/N couldn't help but ask through the tears, needing to know. It felt like he didn't, or that he was loving her less and less every day.
"Of course I still love you." Jughead sighed, his hand lifting to gently run his fingers through her hair. "I'm sorry I've been so distant lately, I've been busy sorting out stuff at South Side High and with the Serpents. I really didn't mean to forget about meeting up with you, okay?"
Y/N sniffled a little as she nodded, just holding onto him a little tighter. Whether she completely forgave him or not was a different question, though she was willing to give him another chance to prove that he really did mean what he said. 
"Hey." He said softly, moving his hand underneath her chin to tilt her head upwards. Her red-rimmed eyes locked with his and she watched his expression soften somewhat when he took in her features, though there was something about his eyes that made her stomach swirl with uneasiness. They were just so cold and unlike him. Maybe he didn't really mean what he had said.
~
Come on, come on don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Something's gone terribly wrong, you're all I wanted
Come on, come on don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Can't breathe whenever you're gone
Can't turn back, now I'm haunted
~
After that night, Jughead had promised to make it up to her and come and see her the following weekend at Pop's. And to be honest, she really needed it. Her week had gone absolutely horribly, with Betty suddenly becoming cold and distant towards her. Y/N couldn't fathom why Betty had become so cruel to her; she just knew that the last time herself and the Cooper girl had spoken, it had ended in a long string of insults from Betty then her walking off. So she could really do with her boyfriend's comfort, after her best friend clearly didn't want to be around her anymore.
Y/N sipped on her milkshake at Pop's as she waited for Jughead to show up, his drink sat untouched opposite her on the other side of the table. Once she had hit the ten minute mark she began to grow worried that he wasn't going to show, but thankfully she spotted him pulling into the parking lot of Pop's after she had heard the rumble of his motorcycle outside. A smile was painted over her lips as she waited for him to walk inside, though it quickly faded once she had caught sight of him.
His face was full of cuts and bruises, most of them looking extremely painful. At first she had been worried that he had been in a fight with somebody at his school, though her stomach sank when seeing the leather jacket he was wearing. The leather Serpents jacket.
He had clearly caught sight of her expression, as Jughead sighed as he slipped into the seat opposite her own. "Y/N, I meant to tell you-"
"That you'd joined the gang you told me you wouldn't?" She whispered, her eyebrows furrowed with disbelief. "Why would you do that? They're dangerous, Jug, they're a biker gang. Are you kidding me?"
"They aren't dangerous." He frowned. "They're like family."
"They're like family?" She scoffed. "Oh, and I'm not anymore?"
"Hey, I didn't say that." Jughead frowned a little more.
"Maybe you didn't say it, but you've been meaning it for weeks!" She practically exploded, sitting up in her seat as her waterline burned with the build up of tears again. "When was the last time we both properly hung out together, hm? Or ate dinner together? Or even spoke to each other without arguing?"
"I told you I've been busy, with-"
"With the Serpents, yeah I know." Y/N scoffed. "You never have time for me anymore, and that's all I'm asking for. I miss you, Jug. You could have at least told me that the reason you were too busy to spare a few hours for me is because you were joining a fucking gang."
"What is your issue with the Serpents?" He snapped defensively, making her flinch at the harshness of his voice.
"You said you wouldn't join them, you promised me, remember that?" She asked. "Oh, but maybe you don't, since you seem to be forgetting a lot recently." She huffed, lifting a hand to wipe away the tears that had started falling. "They are dangerous, Jughead, have you even looked in the mirror recently? If you had to do that to join then what else might you have to do now that you're involved?"
"Will you give it a rest?" Jughead snapped, causing her to flinch once more. "Like it or not, I'm a Serpent now, okay? And I'm sorry that since I have this thing called responsibilities now that I can't spend every minute of the day with you." 
"I didn't say that, Jug." She whispered, more tears falling. "I just miss you, we never see each other anymore and when we do it's... it's like you're a different person."
"Yeah? Well if I'm so different then why don't you just find yourself a new boyfriend, then. One that fits the criteria." Jughead scowled as he got out of his seat, shaking his head as he looked at her.
"Hey, wait." Y/N whispered, also getting out of her seat. "Don't go, Jug, I'm sorry." She whispered, reaching out to touch his arm.
Jughead was still frowning as he pulled away from her touch immediately, shaking his head as he just turned away and walked out of the diner, leaving her stood crying as she watched him leave.
~
Stood there and watched you walk away
From everything we had
But I still mean every word I said to you
~
Despite everything Jughead had said, they didn't break up. A few days later Jughead had stopped by her house to apologise, and for once it looked like he meant it. He had been close to tears himself as he ranted to her about everything, but mostly about how sorry he was and how he couldn't stand to lose her. By the end of the conversation she was crying too, and she had agreed to give him another chance. Maybe by this point she should have noticed just how many chances she had given him recently, and saved herself from any future hurt by breaking up with him, though she couldn't do it. She physically couldn't be without him, it pained her to even think about it.
Everything was good for a while. Betty had given her an explanation as to why she had been acting so funny, and definitely one she hadn't been expecting at that - as she had been getting phone calls from the Black Hood - the infamous serial killer who had taken up occupation in Riverdale over the past however many weeks. Whilst it was a complete and utter shock, she had immediately forgiven Betty, as she understood that she had become distant from Y/N so that the Black Hood wouldn't kill her. And things with Jughead had gotten better. Whilst he was still different to the soft and loving boy she had known before the move, he was clearly making an effort, and that mattered a lot to her.
Jughead had been especially better once his father was out of jail. It was a huge relief for everybody to have FP out, and whilst his return meant Jughead having to step up as Serpent King, Y/N was making an effort to try and understand the Serpents more, so she had been helping Jughead plan FP's retirement party in the Whyte Worm.
Though she had also been meeting up with Toni Topaz there, who was helping her learn the Serpent dance for her own initiation. 
Whilst she still wasn't too fond of the Serpents, she wanted to be there for Jughead to make sure he didn't end up getting hurt or imprisoned like his father, so she had agreed to do the extremely sexist 'Serpent dance' and partially join the gang to keep an eye on her boyfriend.
Even though she wanted to keep him safe, on the night of the party she felt horrible. On her way to the bar she felt nauseated at even just the thought of stripping into lingerie and dancing in front of a whole bar of gang members, but once she was there she felt even worse. The smell of alcohol once she had walked into the building was sickening, and it only made her worse. She was almost convinced enough to leave altogether, though once she saw her boyfriend approaching she knew there was no way of getting out of it now.
"Hey." He smiled once he had reached her, planting his hands at her waist as he leaned down to give her a kiss - thankfully the action helped calm her a little. "You look amazing."
The compliment made her blush a little, as she was only wearing a peach skirt and white blouse, though she couldn't help but wonder what he would be thinking later once she had revealed what she was dressed in underneath the good-girl outfit.
Soon the party was in full swing, and somehow she had managed to lose Jughead in the crowd, though she had managed to find Toni sat at the bar instead. Whilst she wasn't extremely fond of the Topaz girl, she was grateful that she had wanted to help her out with the dance.
"Hey north-sider." Toni greeted once she had sat at the bar, stood on the other side of it. "How're you feeling?"
"Like I'm about to throw up or pass out." Y/N told her, scanning the room for a moment before looking back at the pink-haired girl. "Give me something." She tapped the bar, hoping a drink would help. She didn't even drink - but Y/N was hoping that some alcohol would help calm her nerves.
"Are you sure?" Toni asked as she started pouring a liquor into a shot glass for her. "You don't exactly look like you can hold your drink."
"Please, I need some confidence right now, and if that means drinking to get some then so be it." She sighed.
"Alright then." Toni placed the glass on the bar in front of her, looking a little concerned.
Y/N lifted the glass and eyed the liquid for a moment before lifting it to her lips and knocking back the whole drink in one. It burned it's way down her throat and made her start to cough at the horrible feeling, though despite that she put the glass back on the bar and tapped it, signalling that she wanted another.
"Another?" Toni asked. "Are you sure? Maybe that's not the best idea."
"Please, Toni. I won't be able to do this completely sober." She sighed.
Toni just nodded and started to pour her another one, though as she did Y/N's attention was soon locked on the stage a little away from the bar, seeing Veronica and Archie stood there with the Karaoke machine that Y/N had managed to hire for the party earlier in the week. Tearing her gaze away she took the second shot pretty quickly. It still burned horribly on the way down, though she didn't start coughing again. By the time she had taken her third shot, Veronica and Archie had ran off of the stage mid-song, and Y/N had left the bar to quickly move onto the stage, once Toni had said that it was now or never.
Once she was up on the stage she had managed to meet Jughead's confused eyes in the sea of people, and somehow she didn't tear her gaze as she started singing the rest of the song as she unbuttoned her blouse. Y/N tried her best to look seductive and confident as she stripped herself of her clothes and started dancing, and the alcohol did help a lot with that. She was able to focus solely on the dancing as she moved over to the pole on the middle of the stage and spun around it twice, before lowering herself down onto the floor in front of it. The mass amount of people watching her didn't even phase her as she had moved back to the microphone to sing the last few notes of the song, though once she met Jughead's eyes again she felt her stomach sink with nausea. He had that same cold look in his eye again, the one that looked like he had lost all of his love for her.
After the dance was over Y/N had left with her clothes to change in the bathroom of the Wyrm, missing the speech that FP had started as afterwards she went to stand outside by Jughead's motorbike to cool off. It wasn't long before she spotted Jughead walking out of the back entrance of the bar to come and join her, his expression one she couldn't even read. She could just see that he was not happy, not at all.
"Hey," She said softly as he approached, though was met with no reply once he was stood in front of her. "What's wrong? Was it the dance?"
"It's everything." His voice broke as he shook his head. "And yeah. Why would you do that?"
"I wanted to be a part of this." She told him. "The Serpents, your world."
"Why?" He asked, his eyebrows furrowing as he frowned at her. The expression made her uneasy, as it was one she was all too familiar with recently. "Archie knew to cut bait. Now I'm dragging you down. I'm dragging my dad down."
"He's still figuring it out." She told him softly, trying to muster up a genuine sympathetic smile. "And it's gonna be okay, we'll figure out whatever we have to do together." Y/N reached out to place her hands on his chest, though frowned when he had immediately stepped backwards.
"No, Y/N. Mm-Mm." He shook his head. "Not together."
The words struck her like he had just slapped her around the face. Her head tilted a little as a sudden coldness rushed over her body, nausea swirling around her stomach once again. Was he really about to break up with her?
"Y/N, if you stay, I don't know if I can protect you anymore. You might get-" Jughead paused as he ran a hand over his mouth, before planting both of them on her shoulders. "You probably will get hurt. I can't let that happen to you."
Y/N felt her waterline burning with a build up of tears as she stared back at him, starting to shake her head. "That's not your decision to make." She practically whispered.
"Actually, yeah it is." He stepped backwards as he spoke, the painful cold gaze returning to his eyes. 
"How many times, Jug?" Y/N asked as the tears started falling down her cheeks, her voice becoming wobbly with emotion. "How many times are we going to push each other away?" She gave a light push to his chest as she spoke, taking in a light breath as she tried to stop the tears. 
"Until it sticks." The harshness in his voice just made more tears fall as her expression crumpled. "This was my dad's one chance at going straight, and I wrecked it. I'm not going to destroy you, too." He moved to turn and walk away, though Y/N started following instead.
"Just tell me what happened, Jug." Her voice broke as she moved to grab his jacket and turn him around, tears cascading down her face faster as she reached up to cup his face in her hands. "Tell me."
"Please," His voice was weak, and she could see that he was holding back tears, too. "Go home."
Jughead stared at her for another moment before pulling away from her hold, and turning away to walk back into the bar. Y/N couldn't stop the oncoming wave of sobs as she watched him walk away and head back into the bar, her heart aching as she covered her face with her hands. She felt like somebody had just ripped out her chest. He wasn't her's anymore, and she wasn't his.
~
He will try to take away my pain
And he just might make me smile
But the whole time I'm wishin' he was you instead
~
The next day, Y/N had found out on the same night that Veronica had broken up with Archie too. She had been at Pop's trying to fight back a fresh wave of tears, when Archie had taken a seat beside her and started up a conversation with her. She eventually just broke into a fresh wave of tears as she tried explaining to Archie what had happened, and he had moved his arms around her to hug her, trying to comfort her in the best way he could. Though it felt wrong - his arms felt different to Jughead's, they were more muscular and harder. That fact alone just made her cry harder as she held onto Archie, as she wished it was Jughead sat with her instead. But she couldn't seem to let go of Archie - needing the reassuring contact even if it wasn't from the right person. So she just held onto him tightly as she cried, silently wishing it was Jughead instead.
~
Oh, oh, holding my breath, won't see you again
Something keeps me holding on to nothing
~
Y/N returned to Pop's the day after, hoping to catch Archie there again. Though as she had walked though the doors of the diner, instead of seeing her red-haired friend, she saw Toni sat at the table beside her usual one instead. She frowned as she looked at her, knowing she probably knew about what her gone down between herself and Jughead at FP’s retirement party. She had tried to walk part Toni without being noticed, though just sighed when she heard her call her name.
“Y/N?” She asked, causing the girl to force a smile as she turned to face her. “Listen, I’m sorry about what happened between you and Jug at the party.”
“It’s fine.” Y/N shook her head. It wasn’t fine, far from it, but she wasn’t about to stand and talk to Toni Topaz about her feelings, of all people. “It’s probably been a long-time coming.” She sighed.
“Listen, I-“
“Y/N?” Another voice came from behind her, an all too familiar voice, causing Y/N to frown as she turned around and saw Jughead stood there. She hadn’t seen him since the night he’d broken up with her, and hadn’t planned on seeing him for a long while, knowing she wouldn’t be able to handle it. Though instead of tears of sadness filling her eyes like she thought would happen, angry tears filled them together as she put two and two together. She glanced between him and Toni, and just shook her head as the tears started falling. He was meeting up with her, not even three days after they had broken up.
“Nice.” She whispered. “Rub salt in the wound, why don’t you?”
“What?” Jughead asked, before his eyes widened as he looked at Toni before back at her. “Y/N-“
“I don’t want to hear it, Jughead.” Y/N shook her head as the tears fell faster, quickly stepping past him and towards the exit of the diner to head outside. Her vision quickly became blurred with tears as she walked, breathing becoming a difficult task as she pushed back any verbal cries trying to escape.
“Y/N wait!” Jughead called after her. “It’s not what you think, please.”
Y/N turned around to face him as she started full-on crying, despite trying not to. “No, Jughead, I don’t care!” She shouted through her tears, her whole body starting to shake. “Just leave me alone, okay? I can’t be around you right now.”
Whilst Jughead stumbled over his words trying to say something, Y/N just turned around and walked away as she started sobbing freely.
~
Come on, come on don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Something's gone terribly wrong, you're all I wanted
Come on, come on don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Can't breathe whenever you're gone
Can't turn back, now I'm haunted
~
By the time Y/N had gotten home, she was a mess. Her chest hurt with each rough cry that passed her lips but she couldn’t stop. Weeks of emotional torture she’d endured, watching Jughead fall out of love with her, and just as things had started to seem okay he’d broken up with her. He had said it was to protect her, because he couldn’t let her get hurt, but was that really the reason? Or was he really just not in love with her? And wanted to be with Toni instead?
Once she had managed to get to her room she just slammed the door and fell to her floor, her hands covering her face as she hunched over. Everywhere hurt; her chest, her throat, her eyes, her heart. She felt like screaming, screaming for hours until her throat was raw and she couldn’t make anymore noise. Though she couldn’t physically stop the sobs long enough to even try to scream.
Her hands were shaking once she’d moved them from her face to plant them on her bedroom floor to stable herself, the shakes travelling up her arms and through her body until her entire frame was quivering with the agonising pain she felt. The tears couldn’t seem to stop, either. It felt like she had been crying ever since the break up, and for the most part she had.
“You’re not gone.“ She sobbed, hitting the floor with her palms before hunching over again as she continued crying. “You can’t be gone!“ The words mixed in with her crying to the point where she sounded like a wounded animal, begging for death. And in a way, she felt like it. Y/N didn’t think she could survive without Jughead by her side.
~
You and I walk a fragile line
I have known it all this time
Never ever thought I'd see it break
Never thought I'd see it
~
Another week passed before she saw Jughead again. The first time she had seen him after the break up it had been an accident, though this time he had asked to meet up with her, and for some reason said yes. Y/N tried telling herself that she had agreed to go simply because she was curious about what he had to say, though the real reason was because she was hoping he wanted to meet up with her to get back together.
For once, Jughead was there before her, though the scene looked so odd. For a start, he wasn’t even wearing his signature beanie - just the Serpent jacket that looked so foreign to her. And there was nothing on the table. Usually when they met up, whoever got there first would get each other’s favourite milkshakes. Though the only thing there was an untouched Pop’s menu.
“Hey.” Jughead said softly once she had sat in the seat opposite him, not beside him as usual. “I’m glad you came. I wouldn’t have put it past you if you didn’t.”
“What did you want to talk about?” She asked, just wanting to get it over and done with. Whilst she wasn’t crying herself to sleep every night anymore or tearing up at the mention of his name, she still didn’t trust herself to be with him for too long, in fear of setting off her uncontrollable flow of emotions.
“I just...” Jughead sighed. “I wanted to say I was sorry, okay? I shouldn’t have been so harsh with you about it. I probably could have done it all in a nicer way to make it easier for the both of us. And, I just wanted to say that I wasn’t meeting up with Toni last week in the way that you thought. Really, Y/N, she just wanted to make sure I was okay.”
Y/N scoffed quietly as she shook her head, a sad smile making it’s way to her face. “And I was thinking you wanted to get back together.” She whispered, though he heard her.
Seeing his eyebrows furrow and the shake of his head was enough to make her eyes brim with tears again as a lump formed in her throat.
“Y/N, I can’t do that.” He whispered, reaching across the table to take her hands in his. “You’re in too much danger with me, I can’t let anything happen to you.”
“I can handle it, Jug.” She tried telling him, though her throat was clogged up with tears and it made talking an extremely difficult task. “I can handle it, please can we just try.” Tears starter falling as her voice broke, her hands tearing from his as they flew to cover her face. After a moment she felt the seat dip beside her as he sat down, his arms winding around her and pulling her into him as she started crying.
“Please don’t leave me.” She started crying, the sound of her heart breaking almost louder than her cries. Almost. “Please, Jug, this can’t be over, I never thought I’d see this break, please.”
Jughead was stiff as he rubbed her arm gently, letting his lips linger on her forehead as a way of trying to comfort her. “I’m sorry.” He whispered, his own voice thick. “I have to. Y/N.”
At that she just started crying harder as she held onto him, trying to soak up his hold, his touch, everything, as she knew once he left she wouldn’t ever get it again. She turned to be completely pressed into him as she sobbed into the cold uncomfortable leather of his jacket, trying to hold onto him for as long as possible. Though she knew everything was over, and she couldn’t even take the thought. She couldn’t stand to live without Jughead in her life, she just didn’t want to.
She was haunted.
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gladerwolfstarkimagines · 4 years ago
Text
Zuko x female reader series: Part Four
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You wake up to the aftermath of your actions and have some decisions to make but it turns out you don’t know Zuko as well as you thought you did.
Part One here
Part Two here
Part Three here
Part Five here
Part Six here
Tagged: @creation-magician​ @kaylove12​ @taeeemin​
Your POV
You woke up in the middle of the night darkness covering your room and what had happened came rushing back vividly. How your talk with Zuko progressed to a kiss, to several kisses to him now lying asleep on the pillow beside you, his bare skin glowing in the dim fire light. He had an arm draped around your waist still and you felt happy at how it felt but also scared. What had you done? You and Zuko had broken past any friendship barriers, there was no going back to normal after this. That thought hurt more than anything, losing Zuko’s friendship scared you to the core and made you think back on how you’d first become friends. 
You were six years old and had been brought into the palace to see if you had potential to be one of Princess Azula’s friends. You were older than Azula by two years but all noble born girls around her age were being brought in and as your parents were friends with Ozai you were one of the first. Ursa and Ozai were actually present too not that you noticed or cared. You were too busy playing in the gardens, Azula already had Ty lee by then and they played together nearby but you didn’t seem to care, the instructions your parents had drilled into you gone from your mind the minute you’d seen toys. So you were crouched playing in the grass when someone crashed into you sending your toy flying. You turned around furious and pushed the culprit hard "you knocked my toy!" you shouted. The boy, Zuko, glared at you for pushing him and went to push you back “did not!” he argued. You fought briefly shoving and hitting each other before you barreled Zuko onto the floor with a hard push and brief kick. Zuko gasped from the floor, it had hurt when you pushed him over and he was in shock. Ursa and Ozai had also gasped when you pushed Zuko over and both were not pleased. Ursa was furious someone had dared touch her precious son and Ozai was embarassed how easy you’d beaten Zuko in a fight. Both were angry watching how this would progress and you parents swallowed hoping somehow you’d turn this around, that you’d realise your mistake, apologise to Zuko and help him up. Instead you  glared down at him in the dirt, daring him to make the next move. "It’s not like I meant to!" Zuko muttered but his expression didn’t change. "Well you still did so you should say sorry" you replied matter-of-factly. Zuko stood up dusting mud off his arms "sorry" he said sarcastically and you rolled your eyes "stupid boy" and turned away. Zuko went to walk away but stopped watching how unbothered by him you were. Part of him was angry, none of the other kids had ever yelled at him, they all treated him like...well a prince but you’d pushed him over and embarassed him in front of all his family without a second thought. That part intrigued Zuko, who were you to not care who he was? Zuko claimed that was the reason he asked to play with you that day, because you’d dared to treat him like a normal kid and not a royal. "What are you playing?" Zuko asked edging closer and you looked at him over your shoulder "ball". "Can i play?" Zuko asked carefully as if you’d hit him again. You shrugged unbothered, back then your temper was shortlived, and Zuko joined you. Your parents watched confused as you bonded with the wrong sibling but soon you and Zuko were lost in your own world together, screaming and shrieking as you chased one another, both laughing and smiling, something fire nation children didn’t do often. When you had to go home Zuko ran to his parents to ask if you could come and play again and that was it. Ozai wasn’t too keen you being a girl but Ursa would do anything if Zuko wanted it and so you were brought back the very next day and from then the two of you were inseparable.
You smiled at the memory but it was a sad smile. Not only may you have wrecked everything with Zuko you’d also done something horrible to Mai, just the thought of her you made you feel guilty. Zuko had cheated on her with you. All the times you’d told Mai you weren’t a threat, all the effort you’d gone into befriending her was wasted as you’d gone and slept with Zuko. She didn’t deserve that and your and Zuko’s discovery of mutual affection didn’t justify what you’d done. Zuko shifted in his sleep and his arm around you tightened. "Y/n?" he asked noticing you were awake "you okay?". You nodded staying silent and felt Zuko tense. "Are you sure?" he asked retracting his arm "you’re not regretting this are you?". You heard the worry in Zuko’s voice and shook your head "no...yes...i don’t know" you sighed. Zuko was silent before touching your arm softly "then tell me". You sighed flopping onto your back "we cheated zuko! You cheated of Mai with me! We did that! Mai doesn’t deserve that but we did it to her!". "I know" Zuko said frowning and you carried on "and i know that but still i’m glad it happened" you sighed "and that makes me so angry at myself! How many times did i deny i liked you, told Azula there was nothing wrong with our closeness, acted as if i would never do this and i just did". Zuko frowned "y/n you didn’t know how you felt when you told her all that, you couldn’t have known this would happen, we just got lost in the moment that’s all, we didn’t mean to hurt Mai and i’ll talk to her about it". "You will?" you asked and Zuko nodded "I will, i’ll do the right thing and call it off with her I promise, but last night...y/n last night was the greatest night of my life" he blushed "being with you felt..." he trailed off and you blushed too. You felt that way too. "I know" you told him resting a hand against his face and stroking his burnt cheek. Zuko leant into your hand and kissed it. "I want this" he sighed "i want this with you" he told you "i want you" he told you and you felt the hairs on your arms stand up. "I want you too" you agreed and Zuko leant back in to kiss you. You let him but when it moved onto something more you stopped him. "Zuko" you breathed pushing his chest "no, not until you’ve told Mai, otherwise this isn’t okay". Zuko frowned but nodded "you're right, I have to do the right thing by her and you". You nodded as Zuko moved away from you "i should go then" Zuko told you "so i’m not tempted". You blushed and Zuko smirked "i’ll tell Mai today y/n". You smiled "that’s the right thing to do". "And aften i have?" Zuko asked looking at you suggestively and you smirked knowing what was on his mind. "Not straight after but maybe a week or so after, you know a respecful amount of time and even then we’ll keep it just between us at first but yeah...we'll carry on what we started here" you smiled. Zuko sighed as he finished getting dressed but nodded "okay". He lingered just looking at you before he turned away with great force “I’ll find you once i’ve done it”. You nodded “good luck?”. Zuko smiled staring at you, taking every detail of you in once more before leaving.
You couldn’t sleep after Zuko left. You tried but every time you closed your eyes you’d picture last night with Zuko...everything he did, everything you did, everything you both did and you couldn’t relax. So you decided to just get up and were grateful when finally the morning came. You got on with your day managing to not give away what you’d just done with Zuko and got ready for an evening ball, some show of Ozai’s force before the upcoming eclipse. Zuko hadn’t come to find you all day so you assumed he hadn’t got a chance to tell Mai, or so you thought. On your way into the ballroom someone grabbed your arm and tugged you into side room. When you saw it was Zuko you looked at him expectantly "did you tell her?". Zuko shook his head "actually...my father spoke to me first". You’d almost completely forgotten about Ozai’s announcement to you. You tensed figuring he’d told Zuko you were engaged and waited for Zuko to ask why you didn’t tell him but he didn’t. "Don’t get mad!" he cried and you frowned "what?". "My dad’s asked me to stick with Mai for a while longer". You frowned still confused "what?". "He somehow knew I wanted to break up with her because he came to me this morning and told me I needed to stay with her for now until he closes a deal with her uncle, so not to make any announcements until then". You swallowed at how close Zuko had come to the real meaning behind Ozai’s words. You were so shocked at how you’d managed not to get exposed you just nodded “okay”. "Okay?" Zuko asked shocked and you shook your head "well obviously it’s not okay, using Mai like that, but we'll talk about it later". Zuko nodded and watched you leave the room.
All through the ball Zuko stood beside Mai making you tense and jealous which you knew was ridiculous. You believed Zuko when he said he wanted you, plus you knew Ozai wanted you two to marry, that was a lot of security for any new relationship. Plus Mai and Zuko were the ones actually dating! You were literally the one invading their relationship but still it made you wary, just watching them interact. You wanted Zuko to tell Mai so you and him could start being you, you hated this feeling, it felt so underhanded. Ty lee appeared beside you "what you looking at?" she asked and you snatched your eyes away from Zuko and Mai but she saw. "Ow.." she trailed off "are you okay?". "I’m fine" you snapped and Ty lee raised an eyebrow "really because you looked jealous". You glared and Ty lee shrugged "what i’m just being honest, i’ve never seen you like that especially at Zuko and Mai but that’s what you looked like...y/n you’ve been off all night has something developed?". You looked around and Ty lee noticed "y/n i won’t tell anyone". You raised an eyebrow "why not? If i was you i’d be loyal to Mai and Azula". Ty lee shrugged "i am loyal to them but i’m also my own person...plus you know we’re friends too right?". You frowned in response and Ty lee laughed "ouch!". "No i’m sorry" you sighed "i just always figured you were Azula’s and Mai’s friend never mine, you’re closer to them". Ty lee shrugged "so, i can have more than two friends". You nodded "i suppose" and Ty lee smiled "good, so what’s up with you and Zuko". "Nothing" you swallowed "just him and Mai seem closer". Ty lee nodded "yeah the trip helped...atleast i think". "What do you mean?". "Well they argued...a lot but then Mai disappeared to his room on the final night and in the morning they seemed fine". "Wait, wait, did Mai and Zuko...Mai was gone the whole night?". Ty lee looked down awkwardly but nodded "yeah...i couldn’t help but notice because we shared a room". You bit your lip, not even 24 hours later you and Zuko....
"Was it the first time she and him...do you know?" you asked and Ty lee frowned "why do you want to know?". You debated telling her for a split second before realising that would be a stupid thing to do. "I just had no idea their relationship was so...serious Zuko never gives the impression it is so i’d be suprised if it wasn’t a new development". Ty lee frowned "well that’s not good to hear but i promise i won’t tell Mai" she assured you and you glanced away awkwardly. "But no it’s not new" Ty lee told you suddenly "it happened a few days after Zuko got back to the fire nation". You felt like someone had thrown water over you as you nodded "ow wow that is a shock". Ty lee narrowed her eyes "y/n does that make you...". "It doesn’t make me anything, well maybe angry at Zuko for not telling me, i mean best friends share that stuff!" you said putting on a fake smirk. "Thanks Ty lee for listening" you smiled even though she had done most of the talking. "Any time" Ty lee smiled and she squeezed your shoulder before walking away. Ty lee gone your eyes fell to where Zuko stood with Mai. Zuko had been busier than you’d thought...
Zuko’s POV
Zuko had made a point of trying not to look at you but he couldn’t help seeming to find you. First it when you entered looking amazing in that dress, then it was when you spoke to some old navy general, then when Ty lee chatted to you and now Zuko was watching as some guy stood beside you. He recognised the boy as some highborn man’s son, Zuko couldn’t remeber whose specifically, and watched anxiously as the boy seemed keen to stick beside you. Zuko couldn’t tell if the guy was bothering you but he was certainly bothering Zuko. “What’s got your face all weird like that?” Mai asked and Zuko jumped not realising she was beside him. “Nothing I was just wondering where my sister got to, when you can’t see her is usually when you’re in the most danger” Zuko bluffed. Mai raised an eyebrow “she’s right there Zuko” gesturing to where Azula stood with Ty lee nearby “where she’s been for the past hour”. “Ow” Zuko commented and Mai narrowed her eyes looking at where you stood in full view on the ballroom floor below. “Y/n and Ikem seem to be hitting it off” she commented. “Who?” Zuko asked like he didn’t know exactly who Mai was talking about. “Ikem” Mai replied “you know son of Liang, your families have been allies for years?”. “Ow yeah” Zuko nodded frowning openly at the boy “he’s wasting his time with her, she won’t be interested in someone like him”. “Who is she interested in then?” Mai asked and Zuko avoided Mai’s eye but managed not to blush “i’m not sure, I never met her past partners they were all soldiers in the navy”. “How do you even know that I didn’t and I was right here in the capital all this time”. “I...she...I asked Ty lee” Zuko admitted and Mai frowned “why not just ask y/n herself?”. Zuko felt his face redden dangerously “I did but she wouldn’t tell me” Zuko lied, in reality he’d been too embarassed to ask you, part of him was scared you’d found many people to be with in his banishment, when he’d never thought of any other girl but you. He’d asked Ty lee out of curiosity and got ridiculously jealous just to hear you’d been with two other people before him. The memory made Zuko’s jaw tense and Mai frowned “weird I thought there were no secrets between the two of you”. “Maybe just the one” Zuko replied and felt Mai stiffen. If he was going to keep this a secret he should probably stop staring at you while Mai was next to him. “We should probably circulate the room” Zuko said awkwardly turning away from you and holding an arm out stiffly for Mai. She took it and Zuko lead her purposefully in the opposite direction to you. He’d find a way to get that boy to leave you alone but first he had to play prince.
Your POV
You were saved from some boring fire nation boy who was intent on never leaving your side by a note from Zuko asking you to meet him after the party. You were still angry at him but keen for an escape complied, arriving at his room moments after him. He let you in glancing around in a bad show of pretending not to be paranoid and smiled at you. You ignored his smile and walked over to the window wondering how to bring up what Ty lee had told you. Zuko couldn’t seem to tell anything was wrong, he came up behind you and wrapped his arms around you “what you thinking about?”. “This and that” you said coldly not relaxing into his touch no matter how much you wanted to. Zuko frowned seeing your expression in the reflection of the window. "What’s wrong?" Zuko asked his hands falling away from your shoulders. “Y/n” Zuko said tugging your arm to make you face him when you didn’t reply. You sighed and just decided to come out with it. "I didn’t know you and Mai had been intimate" you said slowly and Zuko tensed letting his arms drop from you fully. "How did you find out?". "I heard" you shrugged "it doesn’t matter how". "Okay i get you feel betrayed that i didn’t tell you before we...but y/n with Mai it was very different and we only did it a couple of times". "When was the last time?" You asked and Zuko swallowed "two weeks ago". You struggled not to smile in disbelief as Zuko told a massive lie right to your face. "So not on the last night of your holiday?" you asked. Zuko paled and you sighed shaking your head. "I only didn’t tell you because of how soon we got together aftwewards! I didn’t want to make you angry". "Well that worked" you retorted and Zuko sighed. "Plus it didn’t matter! By then i was very aware I liked you, you weren’t with us...I was missing you, i knew it wasn’t working with Mai but she offered it as an olive branch so i took it but i didn’t experience it properly, I wasn’t there with Mai...in my head it was with you, I wanted it to be you but i had no idea you liked me, if i did i’d never have touched her". "Why didn’t you tell me though?" You asked "Zuko that makes you and Mai way more serious, especially given how recent it was for you both". "I didn’t want to ruin this" Zuko sighed "this, us..we’re still so new but i don’t want anything to mess it up so i didn’t mention it". You shook your head and Zuko sighed "i didn’t know if you’d mind i mean i know you’ve been with people before me". You heard the tone in Zuko’s voice and spun on him "what? What does that have to do with anything?". "Well I just meant...I knew other people have been with you...I heard about it somehow...but anyway I knew it wasn’t a first time for either of us, if it had been i’d have told you". "Zuko i don’t care about the fact we’ve both had experiences and partners before! I care because less than 24 hours earlier you were with Mai intimately! If i’d have known..". "You’d have stopped it?" Zuko asked and you sighed "i don’t know! Maybe? It would’ve changed things". "Hence why i didn’t tell you" Zuko cried and you sighed "just because you’ve made something easier doesn’t mean you made it better" you snapped "you didn’t tell me about Mai and i don’t feel good about what we did and she still doesn’t know!" you cried. Zuko nodded "i know but my father said now isn’t a good time to break up with her". You rolled your eyes at how Ozai was using you and Mai while Zuko had no idea. "I promise as soon as i can i will tell her" Zuko said "and if my father drags it on i’ll tell her anyway". "How long before you do that?" You asked and Zuko frowned "i don’t know maybe a couple of weeks or months?". When your eyes flared Zuko backed down "okay not that long! Only a few weeks? 2 at most I promise". You still didn’t relax "and in the mean time what buisness as usual?". "Well no more sex" Zuko told you "you’re right i shouldn’t use Mai like that and i don’t want it so i will stop anything she tries, that goes for kisses too". You frowned "i just feel awful still using Mai for whatever deal your dad needs". Zuko nodded "i know but i have to do as he says". Zuko’s tone when he said that was so flat and expresionless it made you look up at him. Zuko was staring at the floor eyes fixed on one spot, he looked so defeated and lost, he almost looked scared and you realised why. The reminder of what happened the last time Zuko disobeyed his father was right there on his face. You felt a wave of sympathy for him, you didn’t want to but you’d always cared for Zuko and how that was hightenned. You sighed and hugged him "i know". Zuko seemed shocked and looked down at you "you’re not mad at me anymore?". "Ow i’m still pissed" you nodded "but i understand...kind of, but if you keep something like this from me again...". "I swear i will not" Zuko promised "i will tell you whatever you want to know...wherever you want to know...however you want to be told..." Zuko smirked and you pushed his incoming face away from you. "Hey none or that, not while you’re still dating Mai, you’re going celebate from her and me". Zuko frowned but saw your face and sighed "yes because it’s the right thing to do y/n". You grinned and ruffled his hair "so you can be trained! Good to know, maybe i can make a boyfriend out of you yet". Zuko blushed but smiled "that’s the goal". You smirked but stopped yourself "don’t get ahead of yourself we’ve got a mess to clean up!". Zuko nodded but smirked “I promise I’ll sort this and in the mean time, best behaviour” he winked and you blushed. “Unless you ask me not to...” Zuko said and you hit his arm away “I’m leaving...”. “Y/n I was joking I only meant this might be just as hard for you as it is for me, it won’t just be me resisting you”. “You sure about that? I have pretty good control” you smirked confidently but Zuko just raised an eyebrow. “I liked you for years and never did anything, you liked me for a mere week before you told me you liked me, kissed me and then had sex with me...and all in the same night”. You swallowed at the bluntness of the facts and Zuko smirked. “That was a one time coincidence” you glared and Zuko laughed “sure...all i’m saying is don’t make your rules too tight”. You rolled your eyes but felt heat rise to your cheeks “i’ll be fine without you”. “Sure” Zuko said eyebrows raised and he flopped onto his bed “I bet you will be”. You watched as he laid back, posture so relaxed and smug...so inviting, he knew this was working. “You’re an ass” you called walking to the door but you were supressing a smile. “I’m here if you need me” Zuko called after you and you slammed the door shut before leaning against it on the other side. Although sneaking around with Zuko wasn’t right it sure was going to be fun.      
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